Mornin volcano
Good to see ur making full use of ur diary and getting it all out I hope it makes u feel better when I look back and think of all the stuff I wrote on mine but it does help and that's all that matters
Keep posting
Castle2
Well did ya take the foooking money? Guess ya wouldn't have to twist me arm twice on that one. Lol im just hoping to keep my fricken money. Pay day today with everything to loose is always a dangerous combination for me. Lol hell seems everything has got issues lately and of course with them a price tag. Yup never enough of them green backs. So did ya take the foooking money?
Thanks for the song, I will be going to see the man himself in hyde park in september at partyyyyyyyyy in the park.
Lets see how you london monkeys do it lol.
Hope today was a better day
take care
blondie
Enjoy the gig Blond one. But no such thing as London monkeys, myself and the other 10million sheep are immigrants in the great Londonium. A view point my 'cockney' buddys dont like hearing....
Took the money today and pretty much played. Did lose £700, not by gambling but by the who gives the f***k about anybody but his fat foooking stomach pm. But hai ho, will take double back....
Interstingly decent day. A left and right hanshake with Sean Bean in the colourful Camden. A conversation with a ex gas sniffer and apprentice compulsive gambler/ alcoholic and a conversation with a chap touching retirement whos scared shiteless of not working 7 days a week. I listen, yet never advise and try to quietly express my random views.
No work this weekend, hence a lal bit scared as my one day at a time has been extended to 2440 minutes. A challenge im wary off. But f***k, does a break ever come or am i foooking blind to it?
Confused.
Confused.
f*****g confused.....
One wish for now AND it goes like this Zzzzzzzzz
Paul,
Great post on the debate thread, which I enjoyed reading so much that I decided to read your diary, which I also enjoyed reading. I like your ideas and thoughts.
Well done on breaking your three week cycle. I have struggled all year with my very own four week cycle. Extremely soul destroying. Even if I could get to five weeks I would at least experience one full month of not throwing my money away.
Anyway, thought I would say hello and well done for your recent progress.
Tomso.
Ty Tomso..
A complete exhausted mind and body. Have finally put a face to my gambling demon and not surprisingly he's someone who eats all the pies and carrys 2 of the deadly sins. Richest man in the grave yard comes to mind when i see the 3d image of the Demon. Sometimes peeps are transparent and its worrying for me that i tap into the fat b******s brain level waves like flukes on adolphin. I see his little evel mind tick over and his attempt at lies to get over his slipperyness as he gets controlled by money. I respect the food chain, always have! I see his little fat greedy face in fear as he realises i sit at the same table as him. I know one day his temper will blow out my way, but i also know, thats when i win. I keep it simple and factual. I am tired of this S***e but i know i need to face the truth. Im honestly beyond caring as i carry my shield of honesty and integrity. My choice is to carry them or bow to the pie eatings sins. I refuse myself the latter. I have dark thoughts, not about my welfare but how i'll pi-ss on the burning flames of hell as the demon burns. Am i wrong, i dont think so!!!!!!!!!!!
Anyway bored of that now, need to think of my self and my aching body and exhausted mind as the bath runs slowly ( f*****g plumbers ) Ive not really watched any tv for past three weeks as my attentoon span has become like a gold fish. 2 gold fish swimming round a bowl, as they pass each other every few seconds they think they've met a new best friend!! Thats my mind!!
Buried deep in my mind i think of the tax and my vanishing future. Like in back to the future movie i see my name appearing on a grave stone and i try to will it to dissapear, yet i cant as i slowly get strngled by the juggernaught of our govts tax department. Seem to fighting the good fight all around me. I watch my back, my front, from a plan view and from every elevation, but when do i ineviatebly fall? Some thing has to give, it just has too.
Shepherds never really liked my fleece as its not suitable for dying but what they dont realise i bring all the good luck...
I dream of the french foriegn legion and love the romance of it. I did meet one, once upon the time. No drama or hassle and seems to me like the ultimate 12 stepper. 2 friends ticked off my xmas card list this week as my move my radar around and see who's next.
Is this self sabotage or is it my process, i dont know. But what i do know is im a dormant volcano happily isolated as i blow out my harmless humes of smoke...
A very tired and puttering out vr o o o o m
Hey there, checking by to say hi! Thanks for your post on my diary, been rubbish this week at coming on here, and feeling the dreaded disease brewing so gonna have to keep strong. Read your last few posts and would like to say you do bring a lot to this forum, for me each time I think about gambling I then think I will have to come on here and confess - and I will be letting you down given the wise words you have given me - and I couldn't have that happen :-). Anyways get some rest - keep strong! Moving on x
Hai TY MovingOn, bought a much need smile. TY.
And 1 big TY to Capital Gold and a long soak. Clean, shaven and mind slowly unwinding to an acceptable pace..
Blinded by the light. Madmen drummers, b*****s and indian summers with a teanage diplomat. Cut loose like a deuce, another runner in the light.
Have made them lyrics my own to get me through as i turn this real hard chapter....
Im the mad dog drummer by the way, lol
Paul
thanks for embracing the new thread I hope it gifts us all some more light.
Any hoo enough of that
Tube station at midnight is the tune I request number two in my all time favourate song list.
We are the mods!!!!!
my favourate is 5.15 by the Who.
Cant link them I am a techno phobe lol
I do have them on vynl !!!
Enjoy the weekend my friend.Mr DJ.
Duncs stepping forward never back.
Hope you're enjoying the day off and never enough of them. Lol football about 4 hours away and priming myself for the event by marinating in spirits along with marinating the food.
Dont worry abot them fat pm's and just be one.
Queens Hall..Leeds....19 ** I care not to remember , green parkers ,lamberettas and only 2 massive electric fans on stage ...
"Hanging out their old love letters on the line to dry...it's enough to make you stop believing ...." Lol
" Town called Malice "and That's Entertainment my faves..
Saw the Style Council too! ...
keep on keeping on my friend ..and as always ty for your support..
R and D xx
Ps ..
Proud of you for you going to your meeting ..I fought it..still do but then had a chat with a German Professor who comes in to our place who is from the Ukraine .
We were on about linguists and this whole concept of "positive and negative" thinking ...you know ,,my bug bear!!
He said ..historically you know where all that came from? .....I didn't of course ....
The Christian Scientists !!!..lol
Felt kinda glad in one way but felt like Keanu Reeves at the end of that film Devils Advocate...just when you think you have beaten the system ...you have never been more prone to being fleeced..but the fact is as the song goes :
We all know , that people are the same whereever you go..there is good and bad In everyone ....
I just remember take what you like and leave the rest and to not throw the baby out with the bath water...there's a lot of good..and a lot of GOD ..good orderly direction in those places and about 80% of folks in my meets are aethiests
Keep on posting...and btw you were right about the south ...if I had property there I would be made up as the boom has begun again.!! In your job you are the man to know on that score.
In the meantime I shall keep my pigeons and eat my Hovis sandwiches and keep my eye on that cardboard box on the M1...lol lol lol
R and D xx
No sign of ya for a bit. Hope all is good with ya.
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