Easy does it!

Looked in another bookies today that I used to go to. Found it hard to imagine myself gambling in there. I got the feeling it was someone else that I knew that used to gamble - very strange. Could not relate to it at all. Long may this feeling last as I know if I put some cash into a FOBT I will be back to square one again and back on the downward spiral. Not for me thank you very much. New people on here are just the tonic for me as I hear and feel their pain. The dark clouds have lifted again for me. Slowly, slowly I'm getting there.

Hey smiler, hoping that things at your end are improving? Stay strong and things will get better-you can only control your actions. Just checking in really to see how you are! 🙂

Keep it going. Blocks are brilliant, associating bad feelings with the bookies is even better. Make is so that you'd never want to gamble again.

Take care.

just checking in to say no gambling thoughts today. Been working hard today and finished the week on a high. Hopefully weekend will be a good one both weather wise and mentally for all of us concerned. Take care

Just sat and thought about why did I used to gamble? I, honestly, cannot answer that! With the help of counselling I have managed to get some answers but my life is about moving forward in recovery so no good looking back. I am very happy with being a non gambler and have a future to look forward to. Today I am liking life and even if it does get tough as long as I don't gamble I have a chance. Thanks

I read some goos stuff on here that keeps me going. I also read some stuff and think to myself !This person willgamble again". I know I shouldn't judge people but I do. This says more about me that the person I'm judging and I know I have to stop it. Everyone's recovery and path to recovery is different. There is no right or wrong especially mine!!

Just wanted to share that with my diary to remind myself.

Thanks

Been here so many times before. I have that feeling that I am safe from gambling demons and have it under control. I have to watch my guard as this is where I get caught out. I know I cannot gamble safely. To be frank I really don't understand what gambling brings to my life by way of enjoyment. If I wanted extra £20 or so I could get it from the bank. There s no such thing as easy money. It's only taken me 30 years or so to work this out. However I have the rest of my life to enjoy and perfect the art of recovery and I'm not rushing to do it all correct. Take care

Ups and downs of recovery are still with me although getting better. I need to maintain an even keel but not sure how to. Maybe it is modern day life. I have to look after myself and help others if and when I can witout interfering too much. All in all not in a bad space. Take care

Days are passing by and doing lots of reading on forum. Might be overdoing it but it is keeping the demons at bay so not a bad thing all in all. Just have to beware that the demons are waiting if I drop my guard. Life has become a more pleasant place for me although the bills keep coming in. I am absolutely dumbfounded as to how I managed to hide such a big secret from everyone including myself. Now I'm looking back and can clearly see that I cannot afford to gamble. I was throwing money away to get a quick adrenalin rush. Complete madness. Good news is, it's never too late. Don't want to dwell on loses as I'll never get them back and to be totally honest I don't want them back. I'll look at it as an investment into my future. I now realise I cannot gamble safely so I will not gamble at all. Thanks

Hey Smiler... easy does it! :-)... but seriously don't worry about how much you post or how long you spend reading the forums. When i was gambling I didn't think or use my brain at all I was just a zoned out vegetable infront of a machine. When i am on here I am using my brain and learning about myself through my own and others experinces... its all positive stuff! Thanks for your support... S.A 🙂

Thanks SA

Most bizarre thinking today. My wife took £20 from the drawer for a legitimate reason and I lectured her on where the money is going. This is rich coming from someone who would spend x amount on pointless FOBTs. It took me most of the day to get over it. Just another day in recovery I guess. What a fruitcake!!!

Thanks for the post smiler, and the words of encouragement. Guess by your last post that the value of money has returned! Keep up the good work. M

Working this morning, thend riving home I had a crazy thought about just having a quick £20 in the bookies bercause you are now strong enough to walk away!! (WHERE THE HECK DID IT COME FROM). I don't know and I don't care. Didn't act on it. Instead I went and bought a John Denver CD for £8 and listening to it right now! I was never going to act on the words whispering into my mind but it has to be a warning to me and it was scarey for a few seconds. Safe again!!

Hi Smiler, thanks for your posting,i can see from reading your diary you have had this happen to you,i guess if it was easy to stop we wouldnt need to be on here.I am feeling possitive, i know i can do it,proved that,just need to take it 1 step at a time,and next time i have a feeling of gambling i need to think about it 1st and not just act on it.all the best mate

Just completed 10K run in Glasgow and feeling it in my legs right now. Other than that no problems on gambling front. See a few new members on the site. I do hope they stick around to give themselves a chance. I feel thier pain when they post but that is hopefully the lesson one needs to not go back. This is a safe place for me and it works. I used to think that I needed to break away from Gamcare but to be honest it has saved me so many times and if I have to post om here every day I'm going to do it. It takes 5 minutes max. A little more if you read other posts. My gambling mind loves me to give this site up as it leads to only one thing. So for now easy does it and I'll not look too far forward.