fresh start

@s-687 I have mate. I can’t take it, it’s killing me

I be honest not been in a betting shop since that awful day. But my partner and mam have put me a couple of lucky 15 on the horses during Cheltenham and on a Saturday. That’s how I’m dealing with my addiction 

Fobt why do I do it to myself winning x amount then go on and lose a hell of a lot more 

Hi Boro,

Not an expert opinion, but simply a point of view, because we can't stop.  That's why we do it to ourselves. A million wouldn't make us think I've had enough, it's time to stop & I've no longer got money worries. Compulsive gamblers are a unique breed, we're never content. Accepting what's gone is gone & we're never gonna get it back is a bitter pill to swallow. Admit it Boro no matter how painful, the bookies, gambling dens are smarter than you & I. Special bets, free offers & that deposit £10 & we'll give you £50 in bets is what creates the next generation of Boros & Slowlearners. 

Best 

Al

Your totally right slowlearner the heartache after the realisation at what I have done again is unbelievable. I’m getting married in 4 weeks and this time I can’t tell her because she be so annoyed. I’m so annoyed with myself can’t take her having a go. I took the gambling block off me card while my partner wasn’t looking because she has all me pins so I can’t get on my online banking this will make her further upset. The money gone I have excepted that again. One day I might live in peace 

I suppose a question we all have to ask ourselves is: What is it that we are trying to escape from?.... cos its certainly the case, that gambling on those machines in the bookies isn't gonna bring us untold riches.

Congratulations on your upcoming marriage! 

Now is the time to live in peace and harmony.

It’s the lies that hurt me I want to tell her about this episode but this time I know I can’t. The whole thing on Wednesday was just stupid and ridiculous. 20 years I have been like this. Thanks for your comment SA

I have told her Dave I couldn’t live with the guilt. She said dont tell your mam because she be really hurt. She loves me don’t think she truly understands how bad gambling is 

Still feel bad about what I did last week. But I have put it to the back of my mind. Surely I must realise now I can never play a fobt again. 

Well blown £870 on fobt roulette. I just never learn 

The more I think about it the fobt are as dodgy as hell. Why do I play them? How can I keep this episode from my wife it will make her very upset if I tell her she going to find out eventually because she goes on my online banking. I got a loan yesterday for the money I have lost even though I don’t need to just to make me feel better. How stupid that 

How quiet is this forum now. Told the wife Saturday she took it quite well but she won’t always be so forgiving. I saw the disappointment in her eyes. The one thing I have learned through this addiction is always tell the truth you can’t live a lie 

Hi Boro,

Sorry you relapsed again but I think you've done the right thing telling the truth. You should nevertheless remember there's always the straw that breaks the camels back & there'll come a time she won't take it well. Have you considered handing the finances over to your wife ?, limiting your access to cash. 

The coming months are going to be tough for all working class people with food & energy prices. You think the gambling den owners are lying in bed at night wondering how they're gonna pay their gas & electric bills or how they're going to put food on the table. I doubt it Boro, here's the truth as long as they have addicts like u.s swelling their profits they'll never have those worries. Wise up mate, see them for what they are.

I'll be 4 years GF on the 9th August & I'm happier now than I've been in my whole adult life. I'm all too familiar with that sinking gut wrenching feeling when you've done your last penny gambling & don't miss it at all. I still get urges like Cheltenham & Royal Ascot time but but because I'm limited to how much cash I have access to I feel protected. Don't give up Boro it's never too late to stop.

Best Wishes

AL

Cheers al and nearly 4 years is a fantastic achievement. 20 odd years I have been doing this. The betting shops I went in I’m banned from but these are betting shops I never went in so probably didn’t recognise me. But when I’m going to counter and saying put £200 on a machine should send out red flags to the cashier. My wife did have control of my finances but I managed to take the code off my online banking and allowed gambling transactions. So I could use Apple Pay 

Fobt what more can I say ?