Gambling- the sure way of getting nothing from something! 11th May 2014

Sorry to hear that you got involved again Robby. Try self-excluding, using Gamblock for on-line etc. Do whatever necessary to keep you away short term.

In the long term I have learned that the blocks dont work, you find a way to gamble if you want to, you have to retrain the brain that you can live without it, not easy. But blocks to money and blocks to be able to participate are useful short term tools.

Best wishes, I know you want to do this. But you have to stop thinking like a gambler day to day. Your previous posts indicate you are still doing this. I was the same for years, knew I needed to stop but was still thinking like a gambler. That doesnt work.

Thanks for the post captain,- yeah your right i have been still thinking like a gambler.

I have to start a fresh,a new approach-(name of a horse! not intended) .

Abstaining and recovery dont have to be hard work,depressing sad times,i should embrace it as a fun,happy time-gambling is the 1 thing that has made my life sad,stressful and hard work.

Gambling is the cause,it brings me down to a level that i dont like,why put myself through that cr**.

Whilst not gambling im happy,stress free,ive proved that to myself.

Captain i must be self excluded from every bookie on the net,ive gone through the top 100 and there is not 1 im not excluded from.

One thing my latest episode has taught me,i would never join a foriegn bookie again.do not trust them.

I used my work computer to gamble on,wouldnt want to put gamblock or anything on that.

And im barred from my 2 local bookies,have been for 7 years plus,still the same staff work there,wouldnt dream of going in,so thats not a problem,would have to travel an 1 hour for out of town bookies,have no means or time.

So the barriers are up,considering getting rid of my debit card,but ive done that before,soon joined another bank.

Ive gota believe again,im gona read that allen carr book,maybe get some inspiration,but as for today i have not gambled,hopefully i will get my funds back from the s***k bookie 2mo,only then will i self exclude for life,dont wana risk it yet.

Day 2/7- woke up in a better frame of mind today,money has gone bk to my card,I've self excluded,bills will be paid this month.

My new approach is to enjoy recovery,my failures in the past have taught this.

In previuos attempts I've thought I'm missing something,but all I was missing was the stress,pain,misery of gambling.

Gambling caused every thing. The money has gone,winning make things worse- these are all key points I have to keep telling myself.

Money avaliable options are going to be de creased,limit the tempatation.

Just for today I shall not gamble

Feels like you are making progress in your head Robby, I can feel the determination despite your setback.

Best wishes, I'm with you.

Thanks for the post Robby, yes you are right I am looking at the times spent in the bookies with rose tinted glasses, I am choosing not to remember all the bad times of losing all my money and as you describe, Yes, behaving like a lunatic at times, good point well made.

Interesting difference to you though, I havent ever taken an interest in internet or phone betting, I always needed to be 'in the heart of the action' and losing / winning in cash and doing the emotional human side of things in conjunction with shop staff i.e. they sympathise with you when you are unlucky and are (apparently) delighted for you when paying you out. (only because they know the money is coming back or because its not their money anyway!) Strange that being a loner I preferred the bookies though - liked the atmosphere and interaction with staff and some punters, boosted my confidence to be classed as some big shot.

Hi Robby,

I completely get the urges to bet on Under/Over on a basketball game with teams I've never heard in countries I wouldn't be able to point out on the map. I also agree with how stupid it is you can't block gambling transactions, but I feel he powers that be are quiet happy with the revolving door of gambling addiction, payday loans and debt. Whilst we are lacking self esteem, suffering with debt and desperate for help we are powerless to question the powers at the top as they continue to live a life of luxury as they tell us we are skint.

BUT THOSE OPINIONS ARE FOR ANOTHER TIME.

Time to move on though Robby.

You are strong, you've proved that...not because you went x days without gambling but because you are still here.

Enjoy recovery my friend, is the best thing in the world.

Onwards and upwards mate,

Hanz

Thanks for the post Hans,- great to get support.

You would think its pretty straight forward for banks to block gambling sites,they always seem to know when you do a transaction on your c/card-thus slapping a £10 cash fee.

Apparently citibank block transactions,why can't all banks?

Anyway Day 3,I'm getting the right mindset back after my couple of blips,I've accepted what I lost,dealt with it,adjusted my financial plan and moving on.

Good thing last nite,watched a bit of the footy,didn't ave a clue of the odds and honestly didn't care,watched without even thinking what I would of backed.

Watching footy is not gona be a problem for me.

Financially I'm also beginning to accept its gona be a struggle for the next few months,holiday to finish paying for,overdraft etc.

What do I need money for? As long as I can get by,ave the odd day out to the zoo,swimming with the kids,I shall be fine. May even get bk into the black by the years end.

Day 3/7 and just for today I shall not gamble

Have a positive day mate.

Things to do with the kids, walks in the woods/seafront/fields (where ever you live) FREE and also a good opportunity for you to unwind.

Onwards and upwards,

Hanz

Day 4/7- day off today,don't feel too clever,but hopefully I will come round.

Been thinking about gambling,but in a good way,i had been following a tipsters horse tips oin the net,he always seem to pick winners,but you delve a little deeper and add up all his tips over the year and he still loses,even after picking big price winners.

If he loses by being selective,what chance have I got.

Even if I did win say 2 grand in a year,where would it end? Stakes would be raised after ,a bad run,I would eventually bet on other sports and races.

It really is sinking in again what a waste of time gambling is,there's never gonna be an end point where I can say,yep I've won 2 grand and that's that. It will never end,I would never consitantly win.

Is that high of winning worth the desperation,stress,risk of losing everything worth it?

Well just for today I can see things clearly and I will not gamble,I have to remind my self of this daily for the rest of my life.

Robby

Fella today you reminded the world of compulsive gamblers of a factual truth

'gambling is a waste of time'

for us there is no end game is there??

I have asked this question to quite a few gamblers now, all have no answer.

My question

So what for you is the end game?? the win that would see you hang up those boots??

For me the answer is whilst at it, there is no answer, if you win you want more, when you lose, you chase, the stigma of losing weighs heavy on our minds does it not??

But we have no end game!!

So we go round and round in circles.

Gambling- glamorous? exciting?entertaining?

For me the misery outweighs the lot.

Fella you did win because you did stop.

For me the answer is there in black and white.

That for us the compulsive gambler is our end game.

With irony those lucky enough to see it stick with it.

Keep making the right choice, keep winning, and enjoying the football, the meat and potatoes end of the season as I like to call it.

Makes men do and say the funniest things dont you think!!

Duncs stepping forward never back.

Day 5/7,-Thanks for the post Duncs,much appreciated,it all makes sense,there is no point to it,got to get that through my thick skull,but its not that easy at times.

Yesterday being one of those times,i didnt ***,but came close.

Had a disastrous day,took the kids out for a swim,pool was closed,went to get my phone fixed,phone shop closed,got ripped off at a restaurant(long story),and come 2 o`clock i was completley P***** off.

Watched a bit of racing,which wasnt wise.but i didnt gamble.

It was just 1 of them days!

Off out tomorrow,an exspense i could do without,but im sure i will survive.

Hi Robby

I have been watching a bit of racing recently too, no chance of gambling on it though, found it to be the final test the other day when I could go into 4 different bookies at a time of day I'd normalyl be at home but I couldnt have gambled even if I wanted to, I have put so much distance between myself and random gambling now it just wont happen. Hope you can get to that point too, took me years, hope you get there sooner.

re your quote about gambling being a waste of time - I reckon the point there is it is a waste of time only for problem and compulsive gamblers.

For those who can bet for fun it can be a great harmless hobby full of excitement and a relief from stress, boredom, something to take a great interest in etc.

Those who think it may be a waste of time because you will never win, you wont make a fortune etc are missing the point - the average gambler just wants to be involved, be in the action, the winning, losing, near misses etc. are all part of that. But for the problem or compulsive gambler like us we cant be part of it as we cannot control and become different people.

Hope the weekend goes smoothly.

Thanks for the post captain,point taken,yep agree it can be fun for some,the fun stops when you think you can make money out of it.

Glad you've proved yourself you have control,time to move on captain,random gambling is in the past,- what do they say- don't keep looking back because you will crash!

Day 6/7- a rare day out for me today on my own,drinking mailnly,intend to enjoy myself.

Have a good one mate.

Keep things ticking on.

Onwards and upwards,

Hanz

I apologies in advance if any one is reading this, I'm gona mention odds and bets etc,I'm doing to remind me of the last time I ever gambled,and what brought me to this pinnacle point.

Another couple of hours were my life was in turmoil,my head felt it was gona explode,my anger was beyond anything I'd experienced,I've calmed down now,the red mist has cleared a bit.

I'm beyond help,really don't know what to do. - well I do,that is to stop gambling,if it was that easy I would of done it 20 years ago!

I've struggled since the end of jan,things have got on top of me this week,mounting c'card,hol to finish paying for etc,losing money on sunday when I was hungover started it.

Come monday I'd figured out a tipster I'd been following could make a profit over the year-just follow his 3 star tips.

Dunno why I bother explaining,we all know I could never just follow his tips.

I lose more money last nite,under 2.5 goals,2 goals in 7 mins- that bet was doomed,just the 6 gaols.

Chased that with another loss,90th min equaliser

.

Woke up in a foul mood,one thing on my mind to chase my recent losses to put me back to the end of jan.

Whack a wedge on a banker horse the tipsters 3 star bet at 5/4,comes last,his other two tips win at 25/1 and 9/1 which puts salt in the wound,chase again in total dissarray now,managed to get a little back.

Shove it on a treble,2 winners,need the last horse for 1200,horse comes 2nd,odds on,jockey error.

I'm now at the point where I've hit a couple of walls,so angry,all I wana do is get my money back,get another bet on,give myself some hope,in a total mess.

My only bit of luck is I'd left my card at work,couldn't log in to transfer funds,I was helpless,nothing else I could do,I phone the bank,try to transfer over the phone,extend my overdraft,anything,desperation,but to no avail.

Briefly think about a won-ga loan

I was on hold for 10 mins,at least it gave me time to think.

Sense resumes,I self exclude from yet another bookie,think about what life has been like for the past few days,and realise the only way I'm ever gona win is to stop.

If I carry on I fear for myself,my mental health,really don't know what I'm capable of when I'm in that mode.

Need to make changes,I've gota quit this cr**,its so un healthy for me.

Day 1 is February 27th,I'm never gona get back to october 13th,its gone.

I'm out of faith in myself,I think I need more than just here,I hold onto a little ray of hope that I managed a 100 odd days not so long ago. I've gota try.