No problems today. Was out this morning and have been busy at home this afternoon: cleaning, tidying and generally getting things in order. No time to even contemplate gambling. Back to work tomorrow and going out for lunch with a friend. Looking forward to payday at the end of the week; it should just about take me back into the black until the start of November. Aiming to remove my overdraft facility as soon as possible. Need to investigate Virgin credit cards this coming week in an attempt to stooze my NatWest loan and reduce the interest I am paying. Looking to have my debts reduced to 10k by 31st December 2011 and reduced to zero by 31st December 2012.
No gambling today. I was busy at work and went out for lunch with a friend, which was very nice indeed.
Fortunately, UK evening racing has now stopped until next spring. That means there is no temptation to gamble after work as, by the time I finish work, racing has already finished for the day. Still, Saturday and Sunday are still danger days so I will be on my guard. It is especially important this weekend as I will be receiving my salary on Saturday. Most of that will be used to hammer my debts so I will leave myself with the bare minimum on which to survive.
On another note, there is absolutely no point in self-excluding from bookmakers in London; I can understand it in a small town or village but there are literally hundreds of bookmakers around where I work and live - it would cost hundreds of pounds just to buy passport photographs and that would a worthless investment. Besides, I need to beat this addiction through will power alone otherwise it is achieving nothing: a preventative is not what is needed; a cure is required and that can only be achieved through self-discipline and indulging in the finer pleasures in life (filling the void not blocking the void). If one wants to gamble, one will gamble regardless of what blocks are in place: software can be easily overridden through the computer task manager or the registry and self-exclusion in a city of 7 million is futile - no one remembers a face and the turnover of staff is very high in the bookmakers. Furthermore, the staff are generally fairly dense, incompetent and pre-occupied on mobile phones or doing their nail varnish to notice the face of someone placing a bet. I wouldn't trust the bookmakers with anything; they are too mercenary and their claims to promote responsible gambling are a disgrace. Furthermore, many of the ********* betting terminals are nowhere near the staff so are completely unregulated in terms of exclusions. The best solution is to avoid the bookmakers altogether and never give them any of your details - they cannot be trusted with anything. I will beat these b******s through self-discipline and a total lack of respect for what they stand. I simply will not grace their foul little premises with my presence any longer.
I don't really understand why the names of bookmakers are starred out (***) on this site - it is unhelpful. It's actually quite important to realise that Laddbrookes are rubbish at self-exclusion and regulation, which is why they place betting terminals (no, not FOBT) near the door and a mile from the cashier. One can slip in, place a bet on the 6pm at Wolverhampton and slip out without being seen. Not that the staff care. Responsible gambling is a smoke screen - the only bets they don't let you place are bets where you may make a profit (each-way bets on a long-odd market). They don't care about you losing money and never will do. They are a mercenary business and are only there to make money from mug punters.
No gambling today.
Busy at work and had a language class this evening which kept my mind off betting; having said that there is very limited horse racing at the moment and none in the evenings so things are easier than they were during the summer months when there was evening racing every day.
I did some financial management at lunchtime and clamped down on my available credit: NatWest overdraft limit reduced from £5k to £2k and RBS credit card limit reduced from £5k to £4k. I have enough money to see me through the rest of this week. When I hit payday later this week, I will transfer £250 to my credit card and the rest will be absorbed into my overdraft, which I hope to reduce to zero in November. I want to be running my current account in the black as soon as possible. Further enquiries to be made this week about Virgin Money as I look to pay-off my NatWest personal loan through a £8k money transfer. Interest payments must be relentlessly reduced and I will shred the credit card if and when I receive it so that it will simply function as an interest-free loan, thus saving at least £50 a month on interest payments to NatWest.
The cold weather has arrived and cycling is becoming harder. Still, it is a good money-saver and I will cycle as much as I can from now on, weather-permitting. Looking to get my teeth into a good book and make some trips to the cinema this week. The key for me is filling the void and not allowing room for gambling opportunities. If I am busy, I won't gamble, it's as simple as that: one must cut off the oxygen supply and the addiction will gradually fade away one day at a time.
No gambling today.
Too busy. Work, work...
I need to start counting days again.
No gambling today.
A friend came down to London from Birmingham. We chilled out and had a good time together.
Still worried about my level of debt but at least it is manageable to some extent although closure isn't until 31st December 2012. It sickens me to think how much money I have thrown away on horse racing this year and what I could have used it for. At the very least, I could have saved 10k for my future child. Oh well. At least I am not ploughing more money into gambling at the moment so in reality I am probably saving money every day through not gambling. Spending 50 quid on dinner last night followed be 30 quid on dinner tonight felt like a massive expense. In reality, however, 80 quid spent on two evening meals for me and a good friend is a much better use of money than chucking away 1,000 quid on a 2-minute horse race. Enough said.
Pellekanin,
What's gone is gone; it is galling to think about what could have been done with that money but there is no merit in feeling bad about it now. I feel much the same way as you do but have resolved to look forward to what I can do if I continue to keep my life on track; you have an awful lot to look forward to!
As for the 'extravangance' of spending £80 on food, it just goes to show how warped our values become! I think part of the problem with being a gambler is that you get so used to spending 'winnings' that you block out the times when small purchases end up costing you hundreds of pounds in gambling losses. To put it another way, I think that I've paid at least £300 for a can of coke out of a bookmaker's before!
Good luck and stay strong.
Ren
As Renaissance said, what's gone has gone. However, depressingly, I just totted up my losses and I've actually lost 20k this year: 8k lost from my savings (which I'd forgotten about) and 12k now spread across a loan and credit card. Utterly depressed.
Oh dear. I had a bit of a blow-out today on the horses and the football. I got home at 1pm from a busy morning. I didn't eat a proper lunch, just a load of junk: crisps and chocolate bars. I then fired up my laptop and, instead of coming onto this site, I went online and staked over a thousand pounds on the horse racing at Aintree and Wincanton. I also had a win double on Man Utd/Arsenal; what a bad bet that was. I watched the Man Utd match and saw them thrashed, literally. It was a good game but was depressing to see my money slipping away goal after goal.
I need to start my recovery again from here. I have locked-down my betting account so I cannot have another blow-out. It is so frightening how one bet turns into two bets and the mad loss-chasing begins. I felt sick, my head started hurting, my heart was racing and I felt hot and sweaty. All I could do was frantically try to win back money. I just craved closure and kept telling myself 'if this bet wins, I am going to stop'. Anyway, I will have to assess the financial situation tomorrow/Tuesday once the dust has settled.
I'm not going to jump into any rash financial decisions but I feel a restructuring of my current 8k personal loan is necessary. I probably need to increase it to 12k and absorb my 4k credit card. Even though the credit card is 0% interest, I would feel more comfortable with one regular monthly payment to my loan and no means of accessing further credit.
Tomorrow is a new dawn and a new day. Here we go again.
Day 1
No gambling today. I was busy at work and am now going out for drinks on the South Bank in celebration of a friend's birthday. The debt repayment is going to be a long, hard slog but I will get there as long as I do not gamble. My first target is one week without gambling. Slow and steady wins the race.
Days 2 and 3
No gambling. Cycled to and from work today thus saving 5 GBP. Rain forecast tomorrow so will take the tube to and from work whilst reading my book. Family staying until Sunday so going to be kept busy. Debt repayment plan worked out on Excel. Credit card to be paid off by the end of December 2012. Personal loan to be paid off around the same time if I make additional repayments during the course of next year although the b******s charge you a penalty each time you make an overpayment.
Crazy isn't it - you count the value of saved fares, I was doing the maths on different combinations of Andrex toilet rolls in Morrison's yesterday, trying to save a few pence. (Surprisingly, it was cheaper to buy the discounted 4 packs of standard rolls, rather than the buy-9-get-3-free 12 pack (subject to standard 400-sheet roll)).
I ended up saving 80p over 16 rolls. I nearly exploded with happiness.
I lost £3000 in 50 mins on my last gamble.
What has happened to us?
mm
Saving money by cycling and getting exercise at the same time can only be a very good thing for you.
Like you, I have an Excel file which details my 5 year plan. It is looking very good for the end of 2012 and Easter 2013.
Let's really aim towards those goals!
GT
Day 4
No gambling today. Thanks for your comments. The value of money is starting to return. How on earth I ever contemplated staking 1,000 GBP on a horse race is beyond me but this is what this addiction does to our minds.
It poured with rain today so I had to take the tube to work. Hopefully the weather will be better tomorrow. Today was a dreadful day at work with several things going wrong. Have a meeting tomorrow morning to try and solve some problems. Still, at least I wasn't throwing away money on the horses.
Realistically, my credit card will be paid off by Christmas 2012 and my personal loan at Easter 2013. However, I am going to try and pay the loan off earlier. Not quite sure as yet what effect a baby will have on my finances but I realise there are going to be additional expenses left, right and centre.
We have a 19-month old boy and another on the way (Feb).
Imagine getting bored of your clothes and buying new ones every 2 months (or sooner) - that's how expensive a baby is! And the rest...
mm
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