here we go on the roller coaster...to a new start..

morning Georgie girl..or at least it will be if I read your post again....

can I just say what luverly thought you put into your writing xxx....

well that told us ....now it's off your chest you can move on...perhaps focus on the future.....just hope you're sensible enuff to keep your demons at bay...can and is hard at times...in fact quite a lot of the time !!

think you have a great future ahead of you girl...just need to find your true goals in life xxx

Rodders

thankyou both for your replies...i do feel it helps to write in my diary..and being honest to myself....am sure i have loads more to type and to get off my chest....

Hi.. just been reading some of your diary.. I can see that it has helped to put it all down in writing.. cathartic dont you think. For me i find that when i am writing my thoughts I am also thinking about them and reflecting upon them. Helps me to make sense of the past and how lifes events led to my gambling etc etc. Often i prefer to write than to watch mind numbingly boring TV lol

By the way.. well done on your gambling free time.. your doing well 🙂

All the best to you and your on-going recovery.. S.A 🙂

Hi G was just wondering how your getting along?

Hi guys woo its been over 2 weeks now since i have depoisted and not gambled...feels wonderful...well a quick update have got man flu lol..anyway i have found a house which is cheaper to rent and 100% better in standard to what me and my daughter are living in...the new landlord has agreed for us to move in...i was very honest about my situation about my debt and getting help etc...so will hand my notice on the 10th oct for this house i'm in shall get new keys to my new place on the 1st of november...am so excited its the new start that i needed...hopefully sort my money out and hopefully go for iva....and get my life on track....thanks for the replys it does so help...many thanks george x

Dear Diary..

Well what a weird week it has been...just getting over of the flu...my sofa and tv has been a god send lol...anyway went to work today felt great as i can now say 3 weeks today gamble free...got home after work tonight to find a letter from the estate agent to confirm new house...so i went straight round to my landlord and gave 2 months notice...her face hit the floor nothing she could say really...it felt great not being trapped any more by them, threating every month putting the rent up and saying they have no money to do the place up...so it does feel great at the mo... o*g i have loads of packing to do..so at the mo everything looking postive...sorry for not writing in anyones diaries have been so busy and being ill...i will try this week to catch up with you all xx george xx

lol george i know what it feels like too move house... i did it after ten years at my old house moved here in april and o*g i had so much cr** lol dumped most of the stuff when i got here,,, too many old memories i held on too i guess... i bet you are busy with the move and stuff take care shell x

well ....where do i start lol....friday 10th oct 08 hmmmmmmmmm returned home from work and guess what i some how managed to fall down the stairs....doh! ended up at A&E for 3 hours have bruised my right leg badly and have damaged my right ankle so bad its so swollen and bruised. Have torn all my muscles etc and have a bad sprain they reckon at hospital would be easier if i had broken it...doh!...so have been resting all weekend...and to top it off its my birthday today...lol got to laugh or you would cry!...anyway today i manage to get out and had a good day...with a pair of crutches...wish you could of seen me...looked so silly trying to hop everywhere...am so tired...never been on so many drugs taking 6 tablets to easy the pain....and its every 4 hours....and do you know what i would of turned to gambling to forget it,i can say now i'm nearly 4 weeks gamble free...and it still feels good...i have managed to save ВЈ500 already which is going towards next week rent...and wednesday have saved another £300 to pay a bill off.it feels so good to be able to do it....just hope it continues this way... will catch up with diaries so sorry for missing for a couple of days....take care all x

george x

Hi george aww poor you hope you are feeling better happy birthday atleat you smile 🙂 about it glad things are going better for you take care and thanx for your comments 🙂

best wishes

jessy

ure doing so well really helped reading your diary keep going ure getting ure life back on track just remember to watch where ure walking and not to fall down the stairs lol take care xx

lol bless ya... and you werent even drunk what a bummer..... you might need glasses hahh only joking,,,hope the bairn is taking care of you 🙂 good too see that by stopping depositing you have saved enough money and can finally pay some bills off.. its a fantastic start and its only been a month ) dead proud of ya xx

Well i can say its 4 weeks now..phew has it been hard...***gamble free***

Thankyou guys for the support it so does help..

well an update...can say now have sometime on my hands i could write a book lol.. Just wanted to point out 2 weeks ago i told my best mate about my problems i.e gambling and reasons why i think i do it! we both agreed it was boredom,loniness, and not facing my problems. He was such a great help told him i wished i did it sooner but i was scared losing our relationship, i do believe now its made our relationship stronger. We have a deal if i feel a bit weak that i feel tempted to gamble to ring him, or go round there ( that will be difficult to go round due to my ankle ) ha ha. He has made me stronger in myself i do feel so good, i have started to work out how i'm going to re pay my bills...first one tomorrow got to go court and pay £380 had a final letter if i don't pay, they can get a warrant to enter my house to take stuff to pay off what i owe...hmmmm thats not gonna happens it is... thank god! one down 6 more to pay. Yesterday i contacted estate agent on new house everything going well shall get the keys on the 1st november, my landlord at mo not happy me moving out..well they should of updated the house when they said they were, leaving it like a sh** hole. I'm just thinking how on earth i'm gonna pack everything in time with a big swollen black ankle..not good is it..got to laugh or i would cry! has been very painful over the past couple of days...thank god for strong pain killers. right feel a bit tired going for a rest shall be back later to add more and read some more diaries..tc all geoge x

Well hello diary....i have so miss ya lol...

I can't believe i'm still gamble free yipee...i'm gonna say that again YIPEEEEEEEEE.....lol and i have moved into my lovely new place and had broadband which was fitted today...hence the diary having a big gap.... well i think hmmm one more month i can pay another bill off and saved over £700 i can't believe how much i gambled away...suppose i could have brought a house out right... but the damage has been done... i've got to move on and start a new life which i'm doing...sorry for not being around...hope you guys are doing well...oh by the way ankle is healing nicely...still swollen 🙁

george xx

Hi George

Your last post has given me such a lift. I read it and felt like I was floating up. The positive moves you have made and changes are fantastic. Stay positive and keep posting.

Regards

Steve E

Good morning my lovely diary...woo i have just worked out that I AM 52 days gamble free o*g o*g...thats just over 7 weeks!!!! Oh my i'm gonna have a nice bottle of wine tonight actually will have a takeaway aswell...lol.. might aswell live like a royalty for a night...

I have just sat here and worked out how much i wasted a month on gambling..i must say i always pay my household bills my daughter has never gone without nor my little puppy dog...still have holidays etc...but i just stopped paying credit cards etc and loans...got out of hand...i wasted over ВЈ800 on gambling...how scary is that...working 7 days a week not good is it...to feed my addiction. Well not any more since 16th sept i have paid one bill off ВЈ380.25 and my next one is for ВЈ1000.25 by the end of this month i should have £600 saved...so i reckon by xmas i can pay the bill off...now i hope peeps reading my entries to my diary you can change and fight this illmess...and you are not alone. I've still got loads of bills to pay...there are some i can't pay but for my own belief i will try...before i go down the route of iva or bankruty....there is hope out there...

george xx