A good couple of pist over the last few days urges will come and go but you're not acting on them. Your beginning to start recovery rather than just abstaining, I can be painful looking for the reasons why we gambled but that's what we do for long term success. In not saying you wil know all the answer soon but you are making a start.
Keep sharing it inspirational to read.
KTF
Hi there Rapunzel, congratulations on your 80 day milestone 🙂
Can I chuck another one into the mix & suggest 90...If you were @ GA you'd get a pen (Oldhamktf, you think you could muster up a cyber one?)! Keep digging out those cracks Rosie, the more work you put into the preparation, the better the finish!
Keep making those right choices - ODAAT
Rapunzel.
I like that.
Congratulations on yet another milestone and the successful mortgage application.
Learn from last weekend, wishing this to be a better one for you.
You're doing great and narrating the plucky spirit you battle the lows with brilliantly.
Well done.
Day 83 gf!
Thanks Loxxie, ktf, odaat and glint for your kind posts! The reference to rapunzel put a nice little smile on my face!
90 will be my next milestone, I take on these words of advice and can always do with another pen!
Had a good weekend, starting to get to work on some of my cracks and although it's hard that's what has to be done! I agree with ktf that this needs to be done in order to stop gambling long term which is the aim!
Have ensure the triangle is broken this weekend, this is essential because when things slow down over the weekend I would usually gamble so to not have access means I have barriers in place!
One day at a time I am committed to making my life better by not gambling!
Today I will not gamble bacause I want that 90 day pen!
Day 84 gf!
Nothing much to report, had a lovely weekend and no urges to gamble - back at work and therapy is booked in this week. Will be good to cover off my little wobble last week and continue to make progress.
Today I will not gamble because I wont have my laptop with me!
Day 87gf!
Have obviously lost count somewhere because I thougt it was 86 days, profile says 87 so will go with that! Had a very good session at therapy last night, continue to pick at what is going on underneath the surface in the battle to beat this addiction. Will try and post more about this later in the week, for the time being rushing around like a headless chicken at work.
Today I will not gamble because I have some new tools I picked up at therapy!
Day 90 gf
Latest milestone achieved of 90 days! Had a lovely weekend in the sunshine and with a day off tomorrow to sort house stuff will be enjoying another short week at work!
Next milestone 100 days!
Today I will not gamble because there is no going back!
Day 92 - gf
Marching on to my next milestone - had a lovely long weekend and got some stuff for the house sorted. Used the content of this diary to talk over my wobbles with the therapist and got some good suggestions for how to deal with the times I can feel myself being sucked into negative places. Looking back to where I was nearly a year ago when I first started going there I feel like I have made some great progress. Im tarting to look forward to little things in life rather than get so far ahead of myself I miss everything.
Today I will not gamble because I am enjoying the little things in life!
Day 94 gf!
Things are going along very nicely, have had very little thoughts of gambling and with being so busy in and out of work I have kept myself occupied. Even though I havent been posting regularly i still read diaries each night and feel like at the moment that is a good balance for me. The sun is shining and Rose is happy today!
Today I will not gamble because I am happy!
Hi Rose,
Thanks for your message. I really appreciate the support. Great to read how well you are doing. Enjoy the sunshine!
Dave X
Day 98 gf!
Creeping up on the 100 day milestone - feel like i am starting to make some really good progress as I have been speaking a lot about this illness to close relations and it feels good to share! Makes me understand why I am battling this and trying to stay gamble free! Feel like I will always have the association of gambling with being a coping mechanism but its getting weaker and so are the urges. They are still there lurking, but I really dont fee like I will gamble. I have had my laptop in my possession for the weekend due to needing to study and had no urges at all - maybe tempting fate but I am getting more used to having it in my company due to travelling. If i dont need it, I will still lock it away but starting to find a balance of sorts as I do need it for my work / training etc.
Today I will not gamble because I am getting stronger!
Hi rose...thanks for post...wow..2days till the big one...great going...paintbrushes...jee. ..ever wished you'd never started ! amazes me how decorating one room trashes the whole home...lol.
But yes...it's great to be doing normal things again..take care..xx
Day 99 -gf!
Nearly there into 100 club, today has been a tough day so far at work but facing it head on, I will not gamble tonight! I always thought reading the diaries that when I reached 100 days that I would no longer think about gambling - for me it has been a journey lately accepting that I am going to have this for a long time, potentially forever. I have gambled for so long that to try and break it after 100 days I have realised is not just possible, and also gambling gives me that rush that is hard to replace. So for now it is learning to accept that this little devil will be on my shoulder for a while but at least I have been able to prove to myself that I can ignore him so he doesnt lead me down the wrong path or feel like I am being weighed down.
Today I will not gamble because I am starting to accept this journey!
So much like me goodluck with your recovery xxx
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