lost the plot..

Hi Londonbloke,

Well done on your 27 days. Pay day approaches. Be pre-pared. Pay priority bills and debts straight away but make sure you leave enough money so that your "living on something" rather than "living on nothing"... It helps to see benefits of not gambling... treat yourself to something (just not gambling! ).

Expect urges to gamble they will come, but they will also pass. Don't carry lots of cash on you or cash card if you can help it. Play the tape forward in your mind.. the money always goes whether winning or losing.

Remember that if you always do what you always did you will always get what you always got. Have a good day and keep safe... S.A 🙂

londonbloke, excellent advice from s.a..i managed to pass a pay day similar to yourself and got through it..if i can do it anyone can..congratulations on 27 days..we can do this mate we all can...

Well done on reaching 27 days, keep it going!

Hi

Thanks S.A, Winningpost and dazzler for your support.

Well i'm off for 3 days now ..(thank god)..Had a very busy week at work , lots of stress and hassle but can now chill and relax and do NOTHING which is just what i intend to do. (Well apart from a trip to the post office to pay a few things off if my moneys cleared, and a little bit of food shopping)

Payday is imminent, but my banks website is unavailable, maintence or something and i can't check to see if its in or not and if anyones taken out there share of it yet.

Probably all racing in there to get paid what is due to them but until i know for sure, i'm just gonna enjoy this moment with the thought that i have money in the bank again (feels good, really does, "he saids as he cracks open a can")

Thanks S.A for that advice in your last post.

I've got all the priority bills covered, and the rents top of the list, also think i'm gonna take your advice and treat myself to something..won't be a lot but as you said it helps to see benefits of some kind. (Made a few quid in tips these past few days as well, so got a bit more than i budgeted for)

I have everything all written down ..to the last pound, all added up, i worked it all out a week after i lost everything back on Dec 24/25th...Crazy really but thats what i did.

Anyway 29 days for me when 4pm hits. One month has passed and i'm a tenth of the way to achieving my goal of no debt.

Tomorrow i'm not going to gamble. Tomorrow i'm going to wake up without the stress and grief.

Tomorrow i'm going to....just live and enjoy..

Thanks for listening

Takecare everyone

Hi Londonbloke

Tomorrow im not going to wake up without the stress and grief . How right you are m8 because your going to get up late with a hangover, still cracking cans open at 3-30 am lol.Hey Londonbloke its amazing how you have managed to really turn things around. You deserve a blue peter badge kid.Anyone who finds it hard to pack in gambling should read your diary.You really have worked hard and you will soon see the rewards for it .Keep going Londonbloke .All the best Jeff.

hello londonbloke, i've been following your diary quite closely and i'm sure someone mentions it somewhere but your last couple of paydays have sounded like they were accidents waiting to happen, no blocks in place or any short term goals. i have to say though this month sounds 100 times more positive with your money prioritised and blocks in place. yeah its gonna be a slog this year but you will only overcome that one payday at a time and you sound well prepared this month.

i liked this bit you wrote

"I have everything all written down ..to the last pound, all added up, i worked it all out a week after i lost everything back on Dec 24/25th...Crazy really but thats what i did."

thats not crazy man thats excellent, thats what most non gamlers do, they know how much needs to come out and when. i know its in the future but when you hit your 10 month goal you'll know exactly how much needs to come out in direct debits and how much you have for yourself for nice things. i'm getting there slowly myself and its a nice feeling knowing how much i need and how much i have left. basically its life, money is what we need to get by, its not the only thing we need but we do need it and we work too hard for it to boost bookies profits and keep their stock market value. i am not gonna work hard anymore for others to profit off me and i think you're gonna be the same. do it for yourself londonbloke.

Hi

Just got in from a rare night out round a friends, plenty to drink ,company, just some chilling time (well was supposed to be).

Was great to catch up but found most of the chat tonight involved gambling of some kind or another. Who lost what ,on what machine, Roulette is a killer etc, arsenal lost etc and on it went...Had a good drink ,watched a decent dvd (Taken, liam neeson) enjoyed it, but all the chat always came back to gambling..

This is a terrible thing to say but all my closest friends seem to gamble in some shape or form and i seem to be surrounded by gambling.

Its understandable as i've spent most of my life gambling, i stopped for almost 3 whole years built up some decent savings then blew the lot when i returned to it.

Its like i never really stopped at all really.

In them 3 odd years that i stopped i still went round or we went out, or they came round to mine it wasn't as often as before and it didn't bother me ,but tonight it did..it really did..

All these people i know i met through gambling at some place or other, these are my friends, some of them i've known for 8/9 years. They've bailed me out countless times as i have them, and here i am sitting in the middle of all these people going on about gambling.

I mentioned i'm finished with it, that i ain't gambled for 30 days, but deep down i got the impression of " yeah well done mate, but we'll see you in 2 months and you're be back at it"

7 of us there tonight and apart from me they are all gambling. I mentioned i've just been paid and even got sandbagged going to the toilet or for a refill on 2 occasions asking me for a sub as they had done there nut.

Of course i said i can't as i'm up to my eyes in debt and i really need to sort it out..

So what do i do?.. Stop mixing with these people, people i call my friends?.

I'm bored to death already, i go out for walks, i go to the library, i do this and do that all to take my mind off gambling but sometimes i want to pop round and see a mate

And they all b******* gamble..

My moneys in the bank, wages have been paid, no-ones taken out anything yet, probably cos its a Sunday but if i'm honest and i still had my on-line accounts or debit card i would be gambling now..Why...i don't know, cos i'm up to my eyes in it but i just would..Can't explain it...ARGHHH

This whole thing is a b******* nightmare

Cut out your friends to help your recovery..

sounds great ...NOT..

Thanks for your reply Struggler

Yep sure ain't easy when most of your friends gamble.. Just something about tonight has got to me..i dunno maybe this is all really "kicking in" for me now!!

I hear you when you say about the TV been bombarded with betting ads, they ought to be banned, but then the gov would lose countless 100's of millions so would never happen.

Its all well messed up really when you think about it, i mean they tell you to be careful and sensible, yet shove it down your throat 24/7..

If everyone stopped gambling in this country just like that, i wonder just how much it would effect things? Taxes, employment, etc..mind boggling really..

Anyway i was just venting earlier, just typing how i felt, its helping me to get things written down.

I just checked my bank balance on-line, seem to check it everytime i turn the b****** computer on. Maybe i'm checking that its still there..i dunno but i keep doing it..

Its still there checked it 5 mins ago, prob will again in 10 mins.. Maybe i'm going off my nut..

Day 31 at 4pm today. Feeling lost and empty if i'm honest. Can't sleep as usual but thats nothing new.

Roll on Tuesday when i'm back to work even though its full of stress.

I'm off for 1 more drink, then gonna try and sleep

Night

Hi lodonbloke. 31 days that has to be good. I understand what you mean about the problem with freinds who gamble. If they are true freinds they will respect the fact that you cant and dont wish to gamble. Dont feel guilt on this, its like quitting smoking. When I was doing that it was weird a few people would almost be jelouse of me , as if they still wanted me to go outside the pub for f*g etc. And I think maybe deep down it was becuase they also wanted to quit smoking as they know what it is doing health wise and even the financial cost but had not made their own choice to stop. Maybe its a similar thing with the gambling - maybe! Sorry your feeling low n lost but take heart in the fact that the low feeling is not down to blowing xxx amount of £ gambling. Keep in there mate. All the best thoughts Blocked.

Hi LondonBloke,

That sounds like a difficult situation with your friends. I dodn't have many friends that gamble, but we all like football. So maybe you can contribute to the conversations by saying who you think will win games etc, but just for the football chat and not inthe sense of giving/receiving 'tips'? Dunno if that is possible or not. You are feeling a bit down, but take positivity from the fact that you have stayed away from gambling for a month. You know you have it in you to do anotehr month - I'm sure of that. You have been feeling a bit down of late, but at least you have roadblocks in place which have stopped you betting online during a tough time - a trap which many of us fall into.

Stay positive. Alan.

hey londonbloke, just wondering how you've been doing, did you get paid ? did you manage to stay off ? Or did it all go down the drain again ? Please let us know, from another 'london bloke'.

Hi

Ain't been on for over a week so want to say thanks BlockedOut, Aberdeenlad and Davey for your kind replies since i last posted.

Reached Friday 29th Jan with all my wages still intact in the bank. None of the people i owed had touched any of it which seemed strange, i was expecting them all to be biting my hand off to get at it..but no.

So me being off for 3 days i thought i'd treat myself to a little something up at hammersmith as i had been doing so well (ment to buy a cheap kettle cos my old one broke a while back).

Well i won't bore you with all the details except to say, i never made it in to Argos i walked into an amusement arcade and bang...off i went like the devil possessed and over the course of Friday and all day sat and part of sunday i blew the bloody lot.

Blocked the internet and self excluded all the places close to me, replaced my debit card with a cashpoint only card yet bang still manage to gamble it all away over them 3 odd days..(except this time it wasn't on-line)

Felt very bad, got very drunk, wanted to bloody die.

So now i'm in even more s h i t cos they all want there payments now (after the event) and its too late, i've seen to that.

God why didn't they just take it while it was there or why didn't i take it out and go pay something off in person.

I sat Sunday afternoon in a complete P***** daze, totally lost, very, very angry asking myself so many questions...It was a very bad time,my head felt like it was going to explode, and in a way i was hoping it would..

I was digging myself out of this sorry mess albeit very slowly and have just fallen back in, head bloody first.

Have been back at work these past 3 days and today i feel better than i did Sunday, although i still feel bloody awful. I have tried to extend my overdraft again to cover some of the essential bills like my rent and was refused point blank so things are not good at all..Dunno really what i can do now except just string them all out till the 25th again..

Wish i was posting some good news

Don't know why i went in that arcade at all

All i know is whats done is done..

I don't know whats going to happen in the next 3 weeks and if i'm honest sometimes i couldn't give a b******* t***

But things go on and tomorrows another day.

I'm knackered cos the odd chestnut of not being able to sleep is back in a big way so i'm off to try and at least get 4/5 hours uninterupted sleep.

(reckon i've got more chance of winning the lottery)

Takecare everyone.

Nite...

Hi londonbloke

are we like 2 peas in a pod or what? read my latest post and you shall see. What's happened to us?

Hi Londonbloke,

I know exactly how you feel because its how i USED to feel.

After losing yet again you are asking yourself why,why,why and i USED to do exactly the same,its a horrible feeling,the amount of times i would be finished at work by lunch and think "I,ll just have an hour in bookies before going home" well that used to 99% of the time be a stupid decision and i would get home wishing i would have gone there a lot earlier.

Its the rollercoaster of gambling and although you can stay away from it for a while you are still very much in the queue to get back on (lack of funds puts you back in that queue).

Theres nothing really that i or anyone else can say on here that will stop you gambling,only offer constructive advice based upon experience BUT i,ll say it again nobody can or will stop you from gambling.

In the end whichever way you look at it,its down to YOU.

I wish you well,

"" A NEW LIFE ""

You have my complete empathy and understanding londonbloke,don't know if it's practical for you but i feel it's vital that you do not have access to money,that is something i have put in place for myself and it is a great help in getting this monkey off my back.

Best regards,

seanostars.