My diary

340 days free of gambling today.

I feel completely different from last year when everything was unravelling in front of my eyes. I had used up all decent money streams and wanted to get off the train.

Confessing to my husband was one of the most difficult things i have ever had to do. It was totally worth it. I am soo relieved to no longer have the urges to press the spin button and waste hours/money. No more having the fear/anxiety of how i am going to pay off this mess without anyone fnding out.

Not just the wasted money but all that wasted time...

It is a good diary for me to read. May you never ride the train again.

369 days today.

I have hit the 1 year mark and am so so pleased.

I am so so thankful to gamcare and the counselling sessions I had. Don't think I would of reached this stage without those sessions.

They got me to work out the underlying reasons for gambling.

I am thankful to my husband for sticking with me.

I have more to say but not sure how to phrase it at present, will come back when I have more time to write.

Well done, keep going!

Congratulations on your first year gamble free , that's a wonderful achievement and one you should be so proud of :)) 

Dear @whatsmyname ,

so pleased to hear that you have reached 369 days gf, that is a fantastic achievement. It sounds like life has turned a corner and you are experiencing the benefits of a gamble free life.

Wishing you all the very best for your continued journey and please keep sharing and posting.

All the very best,

Eva

Forum Admin

Happy to report that I am over 920 days gamble free. 

Time does make a great deal of difference. The self hatred has gone, the debts are going down and no real urges to gamble.  Life is much more calmer and happier.

I do have a fleeting thought once in a blue moon but recognise it's the excitement that I miss and I know that that doesn't last because you just lose your money and more and then the self loathing starts.

1. I don't want to lose more money and get swept back into gambling

2. I don't want that emotional ups and downs.

A nice quiet stable life is most definitely for me. Won't be getting complacent though.

My child is awesome, doing well at school and I am enjoying being the parent I am supposed to be.

Things aren't great with hubby still. Our issues there never got resolved and we are really just house mates though we do get on. He doesn't throw the gambling and financial stuff in my face any more. 

The financial side has been a bit hard but going to stepchange did help loads. In a year's time a few things will be paid off so that will make things a bit easier.

Work still going great, studying as well. Got myself a few exam certifications.

Due to covid I have got into losing weight and improving my fitness. I am really enjoying it. None of this would have happened if I was still gambling.

On the whole life is much much better.

Hi Whats

Fantastic success story & an inspiration to us all. Stand tall, be proud & be happy.

Best Wishes

AL

1166 days clear.

I do pop by every now and then to read my diary. I feel it helps keep me on the straight and narrow.

Everything is the same as above really. Work going well, git offered a new job but my existing place gave me a nice payrise to keep me. 

Wouldn't if happened if I was still gambling as I was doing it slot at work so would probably be sacked if I was.

Can't thank gamcare enough as without the counselling I don't think I would recognise my triggers and find ways of dealing with them.

If you have the chance of counselling please engage fully.

Dear @whatsmyname,

huge congratulations on being 3 and a bit years gamble free, very inspirational!

Thank you so much for your feedback and encouragement of others to take up treatment support. I agree, understanding your triggers is definitely a game-changer in recovery.

Keep up the brilliant work and keep us updated from time to time.

All the very best,

Eva

Forum Admin