My first diary!

hi flagg, wow nearly at the 400 fella, you are going great guns, and remember anything is achievable if you put your mind to it

Flagg.

i know how you feel after reaching the 1 year mark, i had similar feelings. They didn't last.

Just keep doing what you are doing.

gazza

hey flagg,

You have done one thing consistently for over a year now, no gambling, attending ga, and updating your diary every day without fail, I would say thats pretty consistant wouldnt you ?

I know you crave that consistent postive mood , it will come my friend, like always appreciate the good days and dont beat yourself up to much if you have a flat day, it happens to us all, its natural.

Enjoy your weekend .

Take care

Blondie x

Evening Diary,

Day 397 - Feeling fine nothing to report.

Hello Diary,

Day 398 - 2 days to go until that front number changes to a 4. Numbers have been good to me in my recovery and certain ones really do look great when written down. Day 400 will not be anything special as such but I would rather celebrate another mini milestone than return to where I was just over a year ago.

Day 398 - 2 to go!

Hey Mr f

Thanks for your support- you are right (again!!!!) time has passed so quickly. I will never forget the welcome I got from folks on chat which gave me the confidence to start a diary.

Enjoy your 400th celebration tomorrow!

Take care

Irene

x

Evening World,

Day 399 - Another weekend absolutely flown by. Early Monday morning start to look forward to.

This week sees one of those events that seems to happen more than once a year but actually only occurs once a year. Eurovision and Pancake day are 2 events that I always think come around more often than annually but actually don't. Strange train of thought! Anyway, following on from the good fun of last year I am going to host another Eurovision party. Let the countdown commence.

Day 399 - Eurovision Week!

Morning Diary,

Day 400 - A day for me which again hits home at how far I have come. As with anyone I remain just one bet away from disaster but I now feel comfortable day to day and not concerned that I may get tempted back into my vice.

Over the last few days I have also noticed myself picking up and finding that consistency I have been longing for lately. The lighter mornings are certainly playing their part. I have been out running again and feel like I want to continue.

Today I understand recovery is very much a long drawn out battle and doesn't end with just stopping having a bet but today I know it is a battle I continue to take part in and more importantly continue to have the upper hand.

Day 400 - Mr Consistent!

The honourable mr. Flagg.

Fella it is with great pride I read your post this morning, it is so forefilling to see what prolonged abstinence can gift us.

The rewards of your efforts to better your life and that of many others I applaud today.

Keep up the great work my friend, I will enjoy the journey too.

Great to see the 2013 gamble free thread is still running, I am a great believer in target making helps us stay focussed.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

You certainly have the upper hand. The battle is still being fought but you are winning. Everyday bet free you are winning. 400 days is something very special and its great to have seen you on this journey and to get to where you are. It's something you should be very proud of and keep enjoying this new way of life, never go back because trust me ain't worth it. I know you won't tho. Your an inspiration to me and to many on here. Keep ticking off those days. Well done again on the big 400.

Yo,

400 is great , but 401 even better .lol

Good to see you've got your mojo back long may it continue .

Yes it is a battle , but as our resolve builds it becomes just that tad easier , me thinks .

Excuse me being so presumptuous but next goal 500 ?

And have you started a new tin , heard there's a event in Japan early 2015 , something to do with table tennis that should not be missed 🙂

Shiny xxxxxx

Hi Diary,

Day 401 - Thanks for the messages everyone will re-post in the coming days.

Well today I have self diagnosed. Today I have felt very flat this has been up and down recently with some good days and some really low days. This is on the back of what has been in general a pretty low period right from about xmas onwards.

Recently a couple of people have suggested I could have Seasonal Affective Disorder. Now I am very cynical and to me that sounds a bit made up. Yes I have heard of it but I often think well actually I don't really think much about it at all. Anyway, on the back of my low day I decided to take a peek and blow me do I fit the bill.

Infact after reading for about 45 minutes just on different sites I am so convinced I suffer that I will immediately look at trying to sort it. For the last 3 years I have been absolutely brilliant during the summer and absolutely woeful in Winter. This coincides with my current job where I receive very little daylight being in the office. In previous jobs I went out a lot meeting clients etc.

Anyway, bit of waffle there but it's kinda nice to know these things. Moving on and hopefully up.

Day 401 - Interesting Day!

Morning Diary,

Day 402 - Well what a thoroughly miserable day it is again outside. Following on from yesterday I don't feel particularly sad or down on life just a bit flat. I left work yesterday very lethargic and tired despite not having a very busy day. Can almost see the same pattern for the day ahead. It is rubbish and I almost feel ridiculous that it could be linked to the outside conditions.

On a brighter note have a little presentation at work today well at least I think that's what it is for a piece of work I did last year. Nice to have a bit of recognition. Bit presumptuous but I'm sure it's not my p45 waiting for me 🙂 I will know by lunchtime.

Day 402 - Come back Sun!

Hi Diary,

Day 403 - Sun is shining today 🙂 how long will it last probably until about 10am!

Will enjoy it whilst it lasts even if I can't really see it in the office. No thoughts of gambling but on the days where I don't feel great I do wonder how different my life actually is without it. That is a stupid thought really but I guess it's how the mind works and how the addiction tries anything to get back in. Always guarded and never complacent that has to be the way.

Day 403 - Sun!

Hey Mr Flagg,

Day 403 Eh....

I suppose one thing to be eternally thankfull and proud of is that number there ^^^^^ my friend.

We have sunny days and rainy days dont beat yourself up to much about it.... s**t happens.I try and retain my sense of humour and gratitude at all times and that rain can turn into puddles that are great for spalshing in....

Keep your P****r up... hmm is that rude lol...

take care

Blondie x