Hi Tomso and others, just read your last post mate and to let you know all is fine with me and am on day 12. No urges or problems and certainly not being hard on myself, just getting a little tired of the site TBH, I don't think of gambling when I am not visiting the site.
Car needed £300 worth of work to get it through it's MOT yesterday so am well and truly skint but at least I don't have any money to gamble.
I will reply back to you all when I am not at work.
DAY 14
All is fine, not sure how I feel really though, been thinking about the future and how long I can abstain from gambling for this time, before relapsing again.
Had my appointment with the Doctor last night to get my next two months of pills and mentioned to him how I had relapsed twice. He just said in reply I know now how many days I have to aim for, to pass where I got to last time. It is going to be like that from now on, I don't have confidence I will never gamble again but I will try my best not to, for however long.
Money is very tight, I am doing to my last few pounds.
Still staying as positive as I can.
Hi Wilsy,
You never came off recovery you may have slipped but your mindset never changed. I would see you as still recovering stop thinking about getting more days as I think you never failed in the first place. Everyone makes a mistake it's just ours are so detrimental. Keep it up your flying.
Michael
DAY 18
Thanks Michael mate, you are right pal, I will just keep up the good work as I have come so far.
Been to Bournemouth today so it has been a long day and I'm out the next two days also, so being out of the office for a change is healthy.
Am really struggling for money now and with an expensive month next month, I really do need to be careful. At least in February my loan finishes so that should be good.
No urges, no money, probably best 🙂
Stick with it Wilsy. Christmas is often a difficult time for many, with financial pressures and other expectations. Your doing mighty fine. Regards... S.A 🙂
DAY 24
All is good with me, rarely come on anymore and it is helping me not think of gambling, a break away from this site or less regular visits is worth a go, I haven't tried this before.
Counting down to pay day on Thursday, parents took me for a nice Harvester lunch today and Palace won a game, so very happy at the moment.
God bless you all, hope all is well with everyone
Andy
Fella great to see you pick up a win my friend.
The football may not be pretty under your new manager but needs must??
As for recovery
It's yours to do with what works for you.
Abstain and maintain my friend.
duncs stepping forward never back.
DAY 35
Thanks Duncan and Everyone else. Quick update as I rarely post anymore or read as it helps keep my mind off gambling. All going swimmingly, my determination now is to continue being gamble free through Christmas and the New Year which I have never done before. For the first time in Years I am actually looking forward to Christmas this year.
Andy
Fella great to read that gambling has stopped waging destruction upon your life.
A huge well done my friend, keep doing what works for you.
And good to see the palace picking up some points to boot.
Duncs stepping forward never back.
DAY 40
Cheers Duncan, yeah the team seem to be gelling now and getting to grips with the Premier league. Chelsea away on Saturday though, just want us to keep fighting like I do.
DAY 48 Gamble free
Just checking in.
Sad to hear the news with Tomso, I will post you soon my friend but I don't know what words to use at the moment or what to say as you have heard it all before, I just trust you'll take control of everything again soon.
I am doing fine, two days away from my mini target of 50 days. To say I am not having thoughts of gambling would be a lie, I am having them every day at the moment but due to being skint I can't act upon them which is a good thing, I won't get paid until the 31st so fingers crossed a gamble free Christmas this year.
Work have been tremendous this year I was awarded a 'Silver Award' for going that extra mile this year, and was given a Kindle Fire HD. I was also given an expensive bottle of port and a £200 bonus which really shows for the first time in my life I am actually appreciated. I think the bonuses were for only selected individuals so I am chuffed. When I get paid I'll be able to pay a massive chunk of my card off, since my last blip over 50 days ago.
Looking forward to works do Friday, Palace on Sat then 10 days off.
2013 has been a good year for me, I want to have years like this more often, I like them. 🙂
Hi Andy
It has been a great year for you, lets hope next year brings the same esp in may with the palace staying up got a fighting chance, have a great xmas, thanks for all your support this year
Castle2
HAPPY NEW YEAR WILSY!
How about a blast from the past!? I can't apologize enough for disappearing like I did, I felt bad that people might be concerned. (all explained in my diary) I was so pleased to see that you are still active in the forum and wanted to read through your diary before getting back you. I'm pretty tired but I feel I should post this to you now.
About 1 year and 11 months ago you came here as you had conceded that you had a problem and wanted help. You were continuously gambling away all of your hard earned available cash, had little balance and everything seemed up in the air (Jobs / living / Girlfriend). We were in very similar positions. I noticed your recent posts showed around 40 days gamble free, (which is good, don't get me wrong) but, I was concerned about what I might read looking back through your year. I was pleasantly surprised : ) 200+ days, 3 months+, just a few blips! Thats excellent buddy and you should be incredibly proud. Real progress! It was a great read, you have been so very honest and I feel that underlying ambition in you is just waiting to be set free.
I have taken lots of good advice from your writings and it gives me pleasure knowing that you are feeling more at ease in your own skin as things are heading in the right direction. Great stuff on the Job, I know this was a big part of your life that needed ironing out, and to get more cash and recognition is just the icing on the cake!
One thing I want to debate with you is your opinion on where gambling lies in your life moving forward. You have distanced yourself from it this year but I still get the feeling that you can't let go. This is what I am struggling with! We both know it doesn't work for us, yet making a pact to give it up forever IS a tough choice, after all you have had it in your life for a long time. I know you can't promise that you will never gamble again but I get the hunch that you have to let that last little fibre go... have complete clarity that you don't want it, EVER! Sure we will have blips, but we don't want any and definitely don't want to concede to them before they have even happened. Clear away that last bit of doubt, remain armed with everything you have learnt and achieved this year, beat him down when he shows up. We can make this a gamble free 2014 and take that next step to pure abstinence. I may be barking up the wrong tree here as I know you have set high goals such as beating 227 ish, I just don't want you to fall back mentally in anyway!
I know you've taken steps back from GC in recent months but I'd love to hear from you soon. We sound like we are in similar places still and your support and friendship meant a lot, I am sure we could help each other out. (When I am not spamming your diary with Duncs home made Jams)! I hope this rings a bell. Lmao!
I hope you had a fulfilling Xmas and new year, but most importantly, a gamble free one. Duncs is the nominated driver (by me) of the 2014 gamble free bus, I'm onboard, its a long journey and I could do with a bit of company along the way. Hope to hear from you soon.
All the best! Your proud old friend!
Alexis
Hey Wilsy
Lovely to read your last post and well done for channelling your energy in your work and getting the rewards for it. I hope you managed to pay off the extra on your cards when you were last paid, especially as you mentioned that you had been that you had been experiencing gambling thoughts.
It would be lovely to hear from you soon and see you continuing to post.
Take care and remain strong.
Feb.
DAY 71 Gamble Free,
Just about to go to work but just wanted to say thanks to Castle, Alexis (My old mucker) and Feb for your recent posts and support. I don't have any time now to post you back but I will check your diaries and say hi back to you soon.
All been okay my end just haven't spent much time on here due to feeling comfortable and wanting to prise myself away from here a little to see how it effects me.
Had a great Christmas and New Year once I got over the shock of a tree falling on top of my car on the 23/12 and writing it off, which I have lost money on but what can you do but move on.
I would say I have gambling thoughts every 2-3 days but haven't acted upon my urges.
Alexis good to have you back and you are write I will always struggle to let gambling go completely but will continue to do my up most to resist to going back to it.
Have a good weekend everyone. xx
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