Day 112,
Payday has just arrived again. Gladly sticking to my plan and have reduced my debt to £11800. Just about 4 months in and have payed off £3550 of my original £15350 in credit cards/overdraft/loan. Finally feeling like It's becoming more manageable and achieveable to sort out. Just a couple of months until I get this down to a 4 figure sum, so that is now my short term goal. Thereafter it'll be a couple more months until my debt will be half of what it originally was and hopefully this will be enough encouragement to see me through till the end.
Whilst my focus lately has been revolving around myself rather than my finances/debt It's good for me to write it all down here so that I can as well as others can see that paying off debts is very much achieveable if you choose not to gamble. If my diary can inspire at least one other person to start their own recovery that would be great!
Other than that, I'm still dancing, still trying to learn something on the guitar and still staying clear of gambling. Onwards and upwards from now. No going back!
Have a good day all,
Scambling
Day 113,
Not a lot of change since my last post. Trying to fill my weekend up with activities and it's not looking too bad so far 🙂
Stepping forward, never looking back.
Scambling
Hi Scrambling congrats on day 112 , your determination is shining through. Blimey you have been through a lot recently so massive kudos to you for making such positive changes to your life. Its inspiring to read about you adding another string to your bow so to speak by learning the guitar!! It is Important to keep mentally occupied in recovery I reckon. Keep going :))
Day 116,
Hi 4D, thankyou for your encouragement and all the best on your own journey 🙂
Had a good night on Friday. Stepped out of my comfort zone, so I am quite pleased with myself. Today however, I have done nothing productive. Just sat on my laptop all day playing games/watching videos. A lazy day, but very much needed. Got plans with an old friend tomorrow so should be nicely recharged.
No thoughts about gambling, I miss my own living space and having a place to call home though. One day at a time and I will get there sometime late next year. I will get there being an improved version of myself 🙂
Scambling
Day 117,
Had a nice day, met my friend for lunch and a cheeky beer in a bar I never even knew existed. There are so many places I have yet to discover!!
Really enjoying updating my diary on a regular basis. It's motivating to read back and see how far I have come. Not just financially but more so how my state of mind is changing. It is still early days I know, however I am so far away from any thoughts or temptation to gamble. Determined more than ever.
Have a good day all,
Scambling
Super post above scrambling.
Just goes to show, when the gambling haze lifts there is a world out there!!!
Makes me want to say . . . Looking forward to reading about 'the adventures of scrambling!' (Only the oldies will probably understand this, scrambling instead of tin tin!) Sorry if it's gibberish to you. It made me smile so's not all bad!
Keep counting up the days. It sounds like you're doing great! X
Day 118,
Hello Little miss lost, yes there is a whole world out there waiting to be discovered!
Long weekend is over and it was fairly relaxing. Starting to get this guitar thing down now, which is cool. Just need to keep practising! The run up to xmas is on and I still need to get the presents wrapped. Plenty of time yet, I just keep finding better things to do 🙂
As 2018 approaches I am looking forward to a fresh start in life, making the most of my mistakes by not forgetting, but learning from them.
Scambling
You're doing so well. Teaching yourself in your spare time is great. Motivation is something I am a little lacking in so really well done on it. Keep it up.
Day 120,
4 months in, a long way to go, but still determined!
Scambling
Day 123,
Had a horrible dream last night that I lost all the money I had managed to pay off land being back to where I was 4 months ago. I was so disappointed in myself. It felt very real, however it was not real and my march continues for a better life.
I have been enjoying my own time lately. Have been a bit lazy to be honest, but I think it was needed. Just as long as it doesn't become a habit! My goals remains still very much on developing and creating myself and that's not going to happen sitting in front of the laptop all day.
I keep up to date with my credit score and this month my score for the first time has changed from 'poor' to 'stable'. Another reminder that I am doing all things right. As its xmas soon, like most people I get paid early. It's going to be cool to pay off more of my debt as my xmas shopping is already done!
However positive I am I can't say I am enjoying life at the moment because of recent personal events, however I know with time and staying away from gambling I can one day find peace and happiness. One day I shall be content 🙂
Be careful during the holiday season everybody. I know the pressure of xmas, buying gifts and going out for parties can urge you to try and make more money. I've been there, done it many times. It never works. It really never does.
Take care,
SCAMbling
Day 126,
I read today that Broadway Gaming (operator of several online casinos) just received a fine of £100000 for breaching social responsibility regulations between June 16 - June 17. Funnily enough having done a bit of research this company operates one of the online casinos I used early this year losing rather a lot of money as my credit report shows a search by Broadway gaming for money laundering regulations. (Which they did not ask permission for). I thought about writing to the gambling commission with deposit history in an attempt to possibly claim back some money, however when I logged into the online casino to retrieve my transaction history I found that there were no transactions. My bank statements show otherwise. Bit fishy if you ask me. Not for a second was I tempted to browse any games or deposit so no worries there!
I started wrapping my xmas presents today. I forgot how long it takes. Yes I'm that guy who loses the end of the selotape everytime I put it down. Hahah...
Still dancing and picking up the guitar. Hit a bit of a wall with it, as I've learnt, but just need to constantly practice now.
Also caught a cold and it's bloody freezing!! Bring on spring!! Brrrr
Scambling
Hi Scambling
Just thought I would pop in and say well done on 126 days GF, it is a tremedous achievement.
Have fun with the Christmas preparations and keep up the fight against gambling. I hate selotape but not as much as giving money to online casinos.
Muststop123
Day 135,
Hi Muststop123, you too have a Merry Christmas and enjoy it without thr stress of gambling.
I have been very busy, hence it's been a while since my last post. That's no excuse though, I'm sure I could have found 5 minutes in the day to post here. Must try harder! Payday came early this month. After paying what I can my debt has kow reduced to £10800. Almost down to just 4 figures! A lot better off than the £15300 I started with 135 days ago 🙂
Christmas will be here soon, so going to try and enjoy it as much as I can.
Stay safe and Merry Christmas to you all!
SCAMbling
Day 137,
I keep a close on on my finances, in fact it's all on a spreadsheet. Today whilst looking at it I realised I am 1/3 of the way to a debt free life. 5 paydays out of 15 have already passed! I'm looking forward to getting over the halfway mark. That will bring me to a debt level that I haved lived with for many years and am comfortable with. Slowly but surely I will get there as long as I stay GF!
No shortage of gamblers in the casino this time of year. Looking at their miserable faces, I can sympathise. It's a difficult time of year going to go through a bad binge. I am happy I am not there anymore. Whilst I sympathise It's our responsibility to do something about it. We are typically known for blaming others for our actions. That's part of a gambling addict's nature, but unless we make the decision to stop or change or behaviour then continue down the same path of destruction we will.
Merry Christmas to one and who have had the courage to come here an admit your problem with the intention of doing something about it. Stay strong this time of year. It's hard financially on all of is, but remember February is a short month! 🙂
SCAMbling
Day 139,
Feeling very down and depressed again. Can't seem to shake it and be myself. Again all down to women and my feelings. I'm clearly still hurting inside. The pain is far greater than any gambling loss I've ever experienced. Just feel emotionless. Have no mood to do anything, go anywhere... Just lay in bed all day trying to find energy to get up and eat. My confidence is shattered, My heart broken...I'm trying so hard to remain positive, to do the right things. Just feel I'm being left behind... forgotten about... Unloved... I wish I had some friends :'(
I believe this is depression I am experiencing. My God do I feel alone...
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