Reddy to Quit for Good!

307 Days.

Hope everyone had a good Christmas. I did and am boosted after sense.

Its good to know I cant get into any of the casino's I see.

Almost at 365. Does anyone have an opinion on personal treats after meeting a milestone? Like buying yourself something nice you can afford? Obviously still steering clear of anything gamble related.

R

Hi Reddy

Congrats on the 307 and wish you loads of luck for 2017 and 365 is not that far away is it?. Maybe plan a holiday/short break for a treat, which you deserve - always a good target to save for and aim for or just treat yourself to you favourite food or film at the cinema. It will be interesting to see what other suggestions people come up with! Take care.

Gam.

Thanks Gamparent,

A short break sounds good, use some of the money I've been able to save for something enjoyable.

Everything seems to come back to the approx 3 months I had when I was miserable after loosing money. I guess I had a right to be a misery guts but wish I didn't. Maybe if you read my earlier posts around April you will see what I'm getting at. Yep the whole thing bothers me. Maybe I'm writing on the wrong forum....my instinct has been saying one thing but my head another the whole time, I can't seem to make a definitive decision about what I want or what would be best.

This post is probably best to be ignored as I'm pretty much talking to myself to make things hopefully clearer.

Back to gambling talk and yeah gamble free still. 11 days or so till my nightmare night of Jan 20.

R

neTo be more specific what I was saying at some point through that is don't be miserable even after money lost. I in some respects was 'lucky' to only have lost what I have financially but the worse bits are are the way I made people feel when I was not considering others.

Once the money's gone it's done, you can't do anything so don't get down about it.

Easier said that done of course. And it still niggles at me because I wish I'd put money towards a holiday , flash watch or house deposit account instead. But not worth being a grump.

Happy New Year Reddy!

Just responded to a post on new members forum "Where Now" by Jack and Jill. Was trying to say that even though recovery can go well the feeling of exhaustion and prospect of relapse can put quite a cloud over everything for a long time after, and I have witnessed this happening, and I think it will be a while before we see the original bright and smiley person completely return to us. But there are now positive glimmers of that happening. Must be difficult to see that bright light for your future and you may have fonund it all exhausting as well but hopefully the more positive thoughts in your last post will help you along and once that 365 has passed you can move on a bit more. That 3 months has been and gone, you have actioned it and progressed - easier said than done - but now is the time to concentrate on the good months ahead and write that off as a bad experience in your life and one you have learned from.

Take care.

Thanks Gamparent,

Agreed the 3 months have gone and that's a part of my life to learn from.

So here it is I have made it 1 year on since loosing what I consider a fair amount of money in just the one evening. I marked the occasion (20/1/2017) by having some improptu drinks with some mates in a local town. Unfortunately it appears that the 20th is my stupid day where I do stupid things. A girl I know ended up kissing me and I didn't exactly stop her, she's going through a tough time personally and I didn't want to make things worse by rejecting her so I didn't do anything. Just let her kiss me...(terrible kiss)

I have 0 feelings in that way for her and have hurt my girlfriend in a stupid attempt of helping somebody else not feel s**t! It's not even logical. Why ensure you don't hurt someone that is no where near as important to you but hurt the special person in the process??have told the truth as I am a too honest person to lie.

I didn't actually realise until the day after the event that it was the same date as my stupid mistake the year previously.

Probably on the wrong forum saying this but ultimatley as like the gambling I wish I just grew a pair and said no.... I didn't do this either when loosing money as I couldn't except I was in a mess until it had gone too far....

Looking onto 365 days GFree now. Hope everyone else is making it through this horrendous month that is January. You need to keep your wits about you because the terrible weather and no events going on really isn't good for keeping your mind occupied....

Oh dear Reddy - talk about the 20th for getting yourself into some pickles!! Think you should make that day a duvet day in front of the tele from now on!! Your main priority is not to gamble and when you started your story I was relieved it was not a gambling problem!! You have made it to the year and that is the very most important thing, much more important than one kiss that you obviously know was a big mistake. So, just learn from it, move on and concentrate of the next 365 days. We ve all done stupid things in our lives. We older generation were young once you know!! Take care.

Logged on and it's 367 days without gambling. Guess that's pretty good.

Planning on keeping it free.

R

Yes, that definitely is pretty good!

Good luck for many more gfree days. Take care.

Think I must have made a typo in my last post as my counter is at 369 days now. I probably was 357.

Thanks for the last couple of posts in support Gamparent. I really am grateful for all the posts that's been on here, especially the early ones in my other thread when I felt like a dear in the headlights.....

I guess I don't think about gambling too much these days and even my mistake of losing a fair bit in a single session as that's now less than £100 a month spent. I can genuinely think positive and say it's a life lesson learned.

Coming on here helps make me feel how terrrible everything was over 1yr ago and keeps me grounded when I see a healthy bank balance that shocks me.

My trick now is not to go in self destruct mode. Weather that's gambling or some other drink related idiocy! Who knows what's round the corner......hopefully 2yrs g free will be on the agenda.

R