Round 2

Been a week since my last post as I've been busy working.

Feel as if I've had no time to think about gambling but Starting to feel the pinch with it being a 5 week month and still a week to pay day.
Confident I can continue being gamble free as I feel im in a good place at the moment

So I've made an a**e of it again
Found myself in a bookies tonight for the first time in almost 9 years.
Same old story on the fobts.
You can never win, but why couldn't I have realised that a few hours ago.
Gonna phone the counselling number tomorrow to speak to someone as my head is all over the place and I need to get my life back on track big time 🙁

Killie,

I feel for you. I hope your doing okay. Don't be too hard on yourself matey, it doesn't help. This is a terrible addiction and you need to fight it everyday. Tomorrow is a new day.

Keep your chin up.

Julie x

Thanks Julie.
I just feel so silly but I'm determined I'm gonna do this again.
Phoned the counselling folk as soon as I got home from work just waiting on then getting back to me.
Told my Mrs what I was doing and she's fully supporting me too.
Hopefully I hear back from them tonight so we can get the ball rolling

Going to meet the lady from the counselling service next Tuesday night.
Feeling kinda positive about It as after speaking on the phone I feel as if they "get me" so to speak.
Working extra shifts this weekend too, better to make money than squander it all with nothing to show for it.

Lying in bed wide awake, my mind running wild.
I hate feeling like this, I thought these days were behind me 🙁

Been working overtime today now home watching match of the day.
Still haven't heard from the counselling service for my initial "chat" which I'm worried about but I'm sure they'll contact me in time.
The sooner they do the sooner I can get my head sorted out

Got my first meeting tonight with the counselling folk.
Looking forward to going and getting things of my chest.
I'm more determined that ever to beat this horrible illness

Just home from my first counselling session.

Feel as though a massive weight has been lifted off my shoulders and it was worth while. It was good to talk to someone that knows how I feel.
Just wish I had contacted them sooner.

Got a telephone call coming next Tuesday then another face to face meeting the Tuesday after that.

If anyone is reading this and is unsure about contacted the counselling service my advise would be go.
Even if it's just to talk to someone these folk do a great job and will help you on the right path!

So day 9 since my last bet and day 2 since my last counselling session.

Feeling good about things, had a family day today in Glasgow watching a show then stopped for dinner on our way home.
It's situations like this when I realise how good my life is and spurs me on to be GF

Haven't really been on much these past few weeks as I had a small lapse then was on holiday.

Can't remember how many days i am GF but I'm in a much better frame of mind and I am able to say I'm GF today as thats the most important thing.

Heading to my 3rd counselling session shortly and I'm looking forward to it 🙂

3 days since my last update and still free from gambling.
Got paid on Wednesday and still have it all in the bank too.
Tonight's the first little urge I've had in a while but keeping myself occupied reading diaries on here.

Another 3 days gamble free.

Managed to overcome my urges on Friday night and haven't had any since then.
Got another counselling session tomorrow night, i feel as though by knowing I'm going to these every week that ihave something to set my sights on.
I also feel more content in my family life as I have nothing to hide or sneak around to gamble on my phone.

I know it's not all gonna be plain sailing and i am prepared for the hard times but this is the best ive felt in a while and long may it continue

10 days since my last post and I'm.pleased to say I'm still gamble free.

There's been some really hard times and some really crazy urges but by having blocks in place I've managed to overcome them and feel as if I'm in a stronger position now because I managed it.

I hope everyone is doing well.

Hi Killerboy.

Just wanted to say a huge well done for overcoming those strong urges - where there's a will, there's a way!

Continue to stride forward and enjoy remaining g.f.

Take care.

Our Lady