Just think...
...146 days.
WOW!
BE PROUD!
GT
January and February can be funny months, Pat, you know, nothing much to celebrate after Christmas, it's still quite dark and cold, money's often tight...it can be a bit gloomy. That's not to trivialise how you feel, just that I think we all need a bit of sun and a change of scene around this time. Why not take the family away for a couple of days at half term? Hang the expense - or, use your £2 jar. It needn't be OTT. Perhaps a weekend break in centreparcs (there's one near Nottingham) / B&B break near to where you live (perhaps the seaside). Failing that, why not find a panto and take the family? No greater tonic than watching the kid/s enjoy themselves.
Soon be another biggie for you! Keep going, I'm right behind you.
21 weeks today.... failure is not an option.
Good strong post pat tick off 150days on Sunday
All the best Denis
Still not easy, is it? I have moments when I can feel the demon rising. Last night, for ex, I was in a pub and had an idle few moments and I examined what I thought was the quiz machine. Actually, it was one of those multi-function things and it had poker and roulette on it (£70 jackpot). The roulette, the on-screen instructions said, was genuinely random (so FOTB, basically). I wasn't going to bet at that moment, and roulette isn't my game, but a part of me thought 'it's a shame I don't gamble cos I'd have a pound on that...'
That's why I'm still here - need my will reinforcing on a regular basis.
you based in the North or South, if I might ask?
I'm in the south.
I feel the exact same. I had to go to a shop in town on the way home from work one evening this week, I parked where I parked every evening for such a long time while gambling. Every evening I used to rush in for a bet, as it was late evening it was a bet on anything dogs, virtual, american horses anything at all. But this week I felt like would it be the worst thing in the world if I went in and had a bet. I walked past the shop and seen dogs going into the traps back in the day I would be sprinting in and writing out 50 win on Fav without even looking at a form card. I did not go in but I'm questioning when will that pass, if ever.... What can I do to replace that way of thinking. I don't want to gamble , I know I won't but I feel something is missing and I don't know what iit is.
I read what you posted on Keiths diary and agree, I find it harder to come on here and post, I do read but the will to post is almost gone. I would not have made it this far without this site and your posts in particular so I know I must keep coming on here. I just wish I could feel better about it all. Think the debts are still playing on my mind a lot. Feb 2015 is a long way off, I feel like I'm looking for that magic quick fix I was always after.
I'm rambling again so I will wish you a good night and a safe weekend. Hope your OH is feeling well.
You're dead right about control (as you posted on my diary). Dead right. You put it better than I would have. Sick sick sick. But i miss it too. i Have to train myself to get over THAT, and then I've cracked it, i think, although that's prob not possibe, so I need to learn to live with it.
Sorry to read about your recent struggles pat,you gota remind yourself your changing a habit of a lifetime,it was never gona be easy. I struggle the same as you to replace that buzz from betting,but I struggle more to accept my debts,they are constantly on my mind. But if I would of gave this time last year, I would probably be in the position to offer my creditors a settlement payment by now,gambling is the root cause of all our problems,we know life would b ten times worse if gambling is in our life. We can't win cos we can't stop,you gota keep that in your head.
As for replacing the buzz,I don't think you can,but I'm willing to sacrifice that,for peace of mind,knowing that every penny I get goes on my family
Keep strong pat,150 days tomorrow well done.
I still walk past my previous gambling haunts and usually have a mixture of emotions...
...regret
...relief
...what if?
...happiness
They won't go away, I'm afraid. At the end of the day, it is up to us to make the right choices for ourselves and you did this week.
Well done!
GT
151 days today. Did not get to post yeaterday as i spent most of the day nursing a hangover.
Was out Saturday night with a few mates, one of them got engaged so there was a bit of a party, have not being out since christmas so was great to have a bit of a blowout, it really lifted my mood (with the exception of the hangover).
So here i am 151 days into this journey, i know i am in an much better place than where i was when i started, the mood has risen and fallen a number of times over this 151 days but on the whole all is very good, the debts have not reduced much but they have not increased, all bills are up to date and my 2 quid a day jar now has 302 euro in it.
I also had 4 assignments from my collage course due in for last friday which i completed on time (just), looking back to last week i think that added pressure did not help my state of mind, next year they will certainly be tackeled earlier.
I think i convince my mates on saturday night that we should all do a 10k in april, it was under the influence of beer but i think they might go for it. I am signing up for it this morning.
Heres to the next big target for me, the 8th March, 6 months without a bet.
Keep strong everyone, slowly but surly we are getting to where we all want to be in our lives.
Thanks for the message, Pat.
Good luck with the 10k. I get lots of exercise, it's part of the job, but jogging is something ~I would never do for pleasure!
Six months is a truly awesome amount of time, and I look forward to celebrating it with you.
A
Day 153,..... got a metaphorical kick in the nuts this morning from my 12 year old. We were eating breakfast together when he looked out the window at a deck that we had started about 3 years ago and never got it finished or painted. It is a very big deck, I borrowed money at the time to complete it but guess where it went.... he asked me when did it think we would get it finished, I responded by saying maybe next year. He looked at me for a second as he ate his weetabix and said “dad you always say next year”..........
I must say that I felt like sh#@ driving to work this morning, the amount of things my family have missed out on over the years because I was gambling is ridiculous. It is not going to get me down, I’m way past that but I know I have a lot of things to put right going forward from here.
So here is to looking forward and being positive.
Hello Pat its hard not to feel some regrets but each day we stay away hopefully the furthur away those bad memories will be im reminded of my past each time i walk out of our office and past the bookies on the corner but at the moment my only thought is to carry on walking
good luck
Just bumping you up, hope all's well.
no baby as yet!
We have all missed out on an awful lot because of this stupid thing called gambling.
But no more!
Life changes now!
GT
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
