The Start of my recovery

Just a quick check in!

Still doing well. Living in a rural area really seems to be paying off for me.

I have been working hard and planning a well deserved holiday to thailand. I really can't believe that i have come this far.... there is no way that i would be going on holiday to thailand if i was still gambling!

Managing to slowly pay off some debts and finances are looking much healthier.

can't be too far from the 100 day mark!

Great work mate, keep it up . . . : ) Jam

Well pleased to say i have smashed through the 100 day mark we have just entered day 104!

That is the longest i have been without a bet in 8 years.

I cant begin to describe how much better my life is currently. over christmas and new years i hit rock bottom, I had approx $50-$100 to my name to last me until pay day, and even then all i could think about was my next bet, i even googled " Loan sharks in Melbourne" i was that desperate for cash to gamble with, wanting to win it all back.

It was then i took a long hard look at myself and realised this has to stop, 27 years old with not a lot to show for the past 8 years of my life. Many friends buying houses and cars... things i could and should be affording.

I immediately fell out with gambling, i decided to forget about my losses, forget about the big wins ( as they always turned into big losses). I started to hate gambling, despise gambling. I made that decision with the thoughts and feelings of the acute loss of $$$ behind me.

I made gambling my enemy, I made a list of the things i wanted in my life, some material things, some emotional and physical. Looking down the list i asked myself why i didn't have them ..... the answer to all of them was gambling.

since that day, i have hardly had an urge to gamble, not thought a lot about it. and my life has taken a turn for the better. I think that is reflected in my diary. Looking back over the past 100 days there wasn't 1 day that stands out as a real struggle.

Onwards and upwards - lets hope it continues

just a quick check in.... 107 days now. Feeling good.

No big urges or temptations. I have been working hard and keeping on track with my goals.

i am heading back to melbourne next week which will be potentially dangerous and tempting, however feeling ok about this and think i will be pretty strong on my return.

Hi TALBS.

Thank you for your words of encouragement on my diary. Your post on 21st April really has resonated with me. I will be using your diary as a source of motivation. Keep up the great work mate.

Jam

Hi TALBS ...i just wanted to let you know your diary has really motivated me today is day 1 for me and hearing you speak of how your days are going by and how your life is getting back on track is inspiring im also in my 20's and also want to be enjoying my life like people our age should be.

Keep strong and welldone

Hi TALBS,

great job mate keep counting and I'm looking forward to read here how your holidays in Thailand have been 😉

Respect

Wolfgang

thank you for the words of encouragement,

I am pleased to say that i am still doing well. i think today is day 112.

i have been very busy this week, by the end of tomorrow i will have done a 72 hour week at work and i can really feel it.

on the plus side working so hard has kept my body and mind busy. i havent had chance to think about gambling, maybe that reflects how busy i have been or maybe where i am up to in my recovery. It will certainly help pay off some of those debts!!!

i am returning to Melbourne on thursday.... i cant wait to catch up with my friends. There will always be the pull of the casino, but i think i will be strong - my life is travelling in a positive direction and i think that alone will keep me away from temptation.

i have found using a rewards type system really helpful, i set myself targets and if i meet them treat myself with a present.

Often these are things i would have wished for in the past and gambled to try and pay for them .... it sounds stupid now.

i have the big treat of a trip to thailand which is nearly paid for, i have my birthdy around the corner and i think if i stay gamble free by then a new watch could be on the cards.

I remember wanting to get a new watch a few years ago, its value was approx. $500, i must have lost $4000 in the casino that night trying to win $500 and then chasing my losses.

Craziness!

Thanks again for the encouragement

finally finished work for 12 days. What a relief.

I have worked so hard over the past 3 months i have surprised myself.

I am so excited to move back to melbourne. for 12 days.

i will try to keep my diary up to date and i hope i can stay strong in the temptation of the big city.

TALBS i just want to say stay strong while going back to melbourne, enjoy the city for what it is and enjoy the company of your friends fill your time with all the things you should have for all that time you wasted in the casinos, good luck and stay in touch 🙂

Thanks again Jess for the messages of support. I am pleased to say that so far so good!

I have managed to fill my time with activities and haven't once felt the pull of the casino!!

Not checked in for a while. But I am doing well.

I will post something with more detail in the near future

Hey guys it has been a while since i checked into the site.

pleased to say i am still gamble free and havent had a single urge to gamble.

My main concern was returning to the temptations of the big city and those flashing lights of the casino... well i am pleased to say that i didnt feel tempted at all.

i was even strong enough to say no to my friends when they suggested a trip to the casino at the end of a night out!!!

I went to bed ... they went and lost alot of money by all accounts!

well i am back in my little rural town in NSW Australia. I am here for a week.

My trip back to Melbourne was fantastic and i had an amazing birthday weekend away.

as you may have read i managed to survive my return to melbourne with out having a bet which i am very pleased about.

I have just added up and that makes today ... day 126 without a bet!

pleased to have smashed through the 100 barrier, bring on 150.

I am in NSW for 1 week and then head back to melbourne for 2 weeks again!.

well just a brief note here from me. will check in again soon.

DAY 130!

Well what can i say, pretty pleased with how things are progressing currently, i have made it to 130 days, which is by far the longest i have been without a bet in 10 years. From now onwards every day is a reward, every day is the longest i have been without a bet since i was an kid.

So i feel in a good place, i feel like i am living a normal life if that makes sense? i work, eat, drink, live, buy things buy food, go out for meals, cinema, concerts, ..... the list goes on. I am living again.

My life used to be ... get paid, gamble, gamble, work, gamble, gamble, work, think about gambling, think about eating, but spend that money in a bookies..... no money get a pay day loan to gamble.

The contrast is unbelievable. my mood is amazing, i am happy!!!!

I havent struggled with urges for a long time, i rarely think about gambling, i still have debts to pay off, however since i have stopped gambling these have become a regular expenditure that i work into my budget and i am chipping away at slowly.

I finish my work in the rural town today, heading back to melbourne. feeling pretty confident i can stay away from temptations.

that is all for now!

Talbs

Hi,

well done TALBS. Im trying to learn from your posts and am trying to give it a go from the ground up like you have.

Keep it up people are interested in your recovery .

I could relate how you have spoke about not having a partner, nausea, social isolation, chasing losses etc definetly been there. Also I have self excluded from TAB's and still played. Im from Melbourne too

Day 5 for me