There is hope for a better tomorrow

Hey Julie 🙂

The blocker I use on my tablet was blocking Gamcare too but there's a section where I can put in web addresses for exceptions...It still blocks me from the Gamcare chat but I can access the forums no problem.

Slow down girl, you'll run yourself into the ground....

Mari xx

Thanks for the information Mari, I will look at it tomorrow.

Today Dear Diary words will never cover what happened to me today. I chased another human being through four fields, and only stopped because she ran out of breath(that story I am going to have to leave up to your imagination, but it was work related), I had human excretment thrown at me.....I have had two showers since I got home.....and yeah today was one of those days that I will talk about when I am 90!! Tomorrow is a rest day, I need rest, I need to sleep, I need to physically sort my life out...my iorning pile has moved onto the landing....

I sat outside the bookies for ten minutes tonight....sat and looked and sat and looked.....and then drove home, and caught the last 8 minutes of chat...Bless Gamcare....

My last task of today is done.

Julie x

Oh Julie, I have had many shifts like that....Punched kicked, spat at, P**P thrown, groped, screamed at, nipped etc etc etc and it's not easy at the best of times but on a lighter note..It has given me some stonking stories to tell when I'm old & grey lol... actually I am old & grey (under the hair dye :)). And just one hug or 'thank you' makes it all worthwhile 🙂

It's ok to look....You didn't touch.

Hugs

Mari x

Mari, I agree when you know you have made a difference to one person then my job there is done.

I am finally ready to face the day. I need to sort my life out today. My laundry, my room, the excess c**P I am holding on to....all of it...Every night this week, I have come into this beautiful house and sighed because, it is not how I want it. Am off to buy some new bedding. I think it is time. Yesterday was a day to be got over. The sun is shinning, the kids on the street are screaming, the call to prayer church bells on the main street woke me this morning. All in all, my life is not that d**n bad....

Today I will be grateful for what I have in my life, and the courage to make the changes for the things that need to be returned...

Julie x

Dear diary,

Am getting into bed, my new bed linen is on the bed....my laundry is sorted, and my life is in some sort of order....I have a posh hair cut appointment on Tuesday. I am heading into the week ahead in a good place. I have realised today, that life can be very simple when you make it very simple. I think for a very long time, I was over complicating things and worrying about stuff that wasn't even a factor....If someone asked me tonight was I happy, I cannot say that I am un-happy. I still think there is more to come for me. I am looking forward though with anticipation of what is to come.....Tomorrow is a new week, a blank 7 days....I go home for Easter on the Wednesday of the week after, and to see my friend get married....I sat with her in a late night take away many years ago, her telling me that all she wanted was to be happy, on Easter Saturday after many years of her battling her mental health demons, she will marry her soul mate and the one she will spend the rest of her life with. It is important for me to see that...One day that will be me, and the people close to me, will come to see that....Here's hoping diary.

Julie xx

Sending positive thoughts into Monday

Hi Julie thanks for stopping by yes it's still me, just decided to move to an aka,

From your post above I can see you're in a better place hopefully the work situation has calmed down a bit?

If you're not happy or unhappy that's content that's where it's at imo.

Enjoy you're week Julie and don't forget to pack those purple bad boys when you go home .

Deano x

Dear diary,

Two things have happened to me since yesterday. One I have subscribed to the Sunday Times....and two I have opened a Post Office Savings account.....I am not sure if the two things are connected....but hey ho, that is what I have achieved today. I have a sinus infection (the story of my life), so a day of rest tomorrow, and counselling at 3...

Going to go to bed now, didn't sleep so well, due to my sinus roaring at me in the middle of the poxy night, so hoping for a better nights sleep tonight.

Julie x

Morning hope you're feeling a bit better this morning? A bowl of hot water and lemon and a towel usually does the trick for the sinus.

The error message is because someone has already taken the option of Julie so try different ways of spelling it like Julie35

Have a great one x

I feel rubbish Deano, but am plauged by sinus issues for my most of my life..part of the course really. Thanks for letting me know how to change my username, I finally got it now. 🙂

Going to try and sleep for a bit, see can I wake up feeling more human.

Julie x

Hi Julie, nice to meet you, good to be on this journey with you. Hope you are beginning to feel a little better. Helen

Helen, that sleep has done a lot of good. Am up now. Sent an email into work about a task that was outstanding, so that is one worry off my mind.

Going to be very gentle with myself today!

Julie x

Dear diary,

I am having trouble breathing. I think it is this chest infection/sinus infection thing. But it maybe a fight for control of the things that I do not feel control over right now. I will go to the GP and get the once over tomorrow, and then revert back to calming my mind down....

I just had a very interesting encounter with a lady in the chat room. She told me that because I told her that using capitols was getting on my wick, she said I made her feel stressed and felt like gambling, that I made her feel like gambling... I am trying to process that, but all that I can think of is, she is very stressed and looking around for blame.. Could I have been kinder probably, could I shown more tolerance, definately, did I, no! Does this make me a bad person, no. I just didn't get the whole situation.

Good night,

Julie x

Julie I've been around the forum and also chat for a long time and I know when someone isn't representing who the claim to be . Or what on that matter to so on that note you did nothing wrong other than say what we were all thinking and that's when said individuals see the advantage of causing an argument, I can't go in to what I believe because the forum is open to everyone to read but just thought I'd let you know and don't loose sleep over it , look after you and hopefully feel better tomorrow.

Deano x

Deano, I have gathered my thoughts and that is the conclusion I came to as well...maybe I shouldn't have used the word wick, but it was throbbing at me, so I did...I hope I feel better soon too,

Julie x

Julie,

Agree with Deano's comments above and for the record i thought you were very restrained.

Hope you feel better soon.

X