tomorrow is a new day

Today is day 1, day one of my gamble free journey. Each day at a time, I have lots to focus on to keep busy, and I feel this forum will help a great deal. Having people I can talk to, people who understand.

Welcome to the diaries Emel. Great to have you here amongst us and ready to do battle. We are stronger going forward together. Here you can find support and friendly advice.

This is a war. The compulsion to gamble is very hard to overcome but many do succeed. Courage is needed and we have to be brave and strong. The addiction will throw everything at us, it will try to frighten and confuse by feeding us doubts and delusions. Every day though is only 24 hours and every day is another battle won.

Wishing you well...stephen

Thanks Stephen.

Hi Emel, thank you for posting and sharing. We are all in the same position, but we all want to help each other. It is great seeing each morning and afternoon that people who are suffering as i am, are able to stop the gambling. It gives me great strength. I use my diary as a creative outlet for me, but I also put on there what my counsellor has been telling me and what we have been workign through. I am aware that not everyone has the ability to go to one to one counselling.

Take care, get through today in small steps. Get to lunch, get to mid afternoon, get to the end of the working day. We can beat this.

Hi burko, yes we can beat it. Its amazing (if thats the right word) that so many people are in the same situation. I would never gamble £100’s or £1000’s of hard physical cash but when online its like its not real money, the only way I can describe it. I did so well for a long time possibly over a year, but a friend won £10k online and i thought wow maybe i can win that too, and redeem previous losses. What a clown, then another friend won about £3000, and yep i had those same thoughts again. I think what i could have done with the money I have gambled over the years. What I could have treated the family too. However those days are gone!! My husband knows nothing of my gambling, or my debt. I cannot tell him due to previous circumstances. It would destroy him, and possibly us. I was doing really well and all debt was 0% but ive since used a credit card (as always) and its got a few thousand on it. I think I can be debt free in about 18 months. If it takes longer I really dont mind. I truly believe having this forum and the support of you lovely folks will help. Its crazy how this is an addiction that cannot be seen, and is so very easy to hide. And I dont think it is as understood.

Onwards and upwards!

Good luck on your journey, you will feel very up and down like the rest of us but I have full faith and confidence that you can do this and change your life for the better.

Will check in when I can

Wilsy

Take it one day at a time, Emel.

By not gambling today, you’re winning the battle.

It can be hard at times, like Wilsy says, but you’re not damaging yourself further by not gambling.

Every morning you wake up without gambling the previous day, should be celebrated.

It is celebrated, by each and every one of us on here.

I raise a glass to myself both at the start and at the end of the day.

Keep fighting those urges and keep posting on your diary. You’re sure to get plenty of support.

Dan x

Thanks for everyones messages of support. I am ashamed to admit I have fell off the horse, already, feel so down and dissapointed in myself. I feel like i will be trapped forever. feeling very low just now. however I did stop, and didnt feed the account any more money. I have now self excluded, and asked for it to be indefinite. Theres not many sites I can play on having previously self excluded. how stupid can i be.

I feel better for having admitted it here, than pretending it hasnt happened. I guess tomorrow really is a new day.

New day Emel.im 14 days free but have a very similar story.i hope to be debt free in 3 years.we can and will do this.i plan to come on to site each day to remind me that there is a good life waiting for me .

Keep your chin up, Emel.

Let’s try an make this your last day 1. You can do this. Set yourself small manageable targets. Hour by hour if you have to. Make it your mission to get through to the end of the day.

Keep updating your diary with your thoughts and whenever you do get any urges, take 30 seconds out to rethink those urges.

A gamble free life is there for the taking. It’s up to you now, Emel.

You can do this! Make yourself a success story 🙂

Cookie12 wrote: New day Emel.im 14 days free but have a very similar story.i hope to be debt free in 3 years.we can and will do this.i plan to come on to site each day to remind me that there is a good life waiting for me .

Well done on getting to 14 days Cookie! fantastic acheivement. Like yourself, if I can stay on track in 3 years I too will be debt free, hopefully before if I can. Yes i can feel this site is going to be a big help. I have been thinking about buying a new dyson hairdryer, but at £300 its not cheap, but thats what i have just thrown away. I could have bought it and had something for my money, hey ho...thats a gamblers life isnt it.

DeterminedDan wrote: Keep your chin up, Emel.

thanks Dan, it really is much appreciated. Hopefully now that I have actually made the step to self exclude, thats a big step in the right direction.

I so wanted to tell my husband my troubles tonight, but i know i just can't. He obviously seen something was bothering me as he asked what was wrong. What I really want is for him to tell me its going to be ok, he will deal with the finances and we will get there.

Hi Emel, I can feel what you're going through. I myself am a compulsive gambler and been off gambling for 27 days. I was too hesitant and scared to come clean to my girlfriend. In the end I decided to do it because I wanted to kill this horrible illness and I knew that I couldn't do it alone. Best decision ever I made now I feel so relived that I told her about all my problems and the debt owed. She keeps my cards and has access to my finances including my credit report.

I understand that you are waiting for the right moment to tell your husband and I'd advise you that you do sooner rather than later. As the saying goes honesty is the best policy. I wish you all the best. I hope you will find the strength to kill this illness.