Trying again.

No need to apologise my friend. I really appreciate the support.

I am predominately an online gambler. But I was just saying how easy it would be to pop into a shop if tempted. However when I bet in a shop, I never do anywhere near the amounts I do online because when I'm handing over real money it's clear how crazy it is. When it's just a number on a computer screen I lose my grip on reality.

the debt is going yo take me years to pay off but I should still be able to do it and have enough to get by on. It makes me so angry to think Im going to be paying out thousands per month for the next few years. I could do so much with that money. I could buy myself the brand new porsche I've always wanted! Lol. But I have to accept that it's my fault and get on with it. I could probably have bought myself a nice house with the money I've lost over the years. Can't believe how stupid I've been.

You & me both (the Porsche & a house with a swimming pool) but it's water under the bridge for all of us now if we want to keep on winning!

It's crazy how many nights I've sat & worked things out to the penny, figuring exactly how much interest will be & how much money I could have left over on payday to survive & then going straight out & blowing the lot & more! I scrimped & saved on shopping yet, as if it wasn't bad enough shovelling notes into a machine, towards the end, I thought nothing of handing my card over & pressing in my PIN! I knew very much that it was, but it just didn't feel real...Until I did my tax return that is & saw all the hundreds of transactions! Because of the hundreds of bookies, I thought most addicts would struggle with machines, never in a million years did I realise how huge the online industry is! I think I tried it once, got up to huge numbers & assumed I was playing some sort of demo so carried in til I had nothing & left hearing no more from them. I know realise how incredibly lucky I am! Had I caught the bug, having it at my fingers 24/7 would literally have finished me off!

I get what you are saying now & I this is your journey so it doesn't matter what I think, I am here, walking alongside you in recovery - ODAAT

I do the same every month. I think it's going to be ok because I will have £800 quid after everything's paid and then I just end up blowing every penny and leaving myself with nothing for a month. If it wasn't for my girlfriends wage then I wouldn't be able to buy food or travel to work because I've prioritised gambling over these things.

not anymore though hopefully! Day 4 was pretty easily navigated. Not many gambling thoughts at all today. I'm sure the next few days will be more difficult though, with all the darts, golf and football that I'd normally bet on.

hope all is going well! Have just read your story so far. Hope you managed to stay strong and get back on track i have just lost a small amount compared to you .. however in context to me that is alot of money as i am in education still and with out a job!

its the feeling of being on top of the world its so easy winning money then bang with in 5 or 6 spins £200 blown straight away!

iv come here to hopefully get motivation from people like you to be able to finally stay away from spinning online and just stick to a few pound a week on football bets that i enjoy! I shall start my journey tonight! day 1 here we go ..

All the best! Matt

Rock, only you can place the bets & doing recovery your way you have to replace hope with determination! I know you can do it, people on here know you can do it, now all you have to do is believe you can & you will! Take it from me, the rewards are worth everything you put into this...Don't be the fool I was leaving it so long!

Stay strong - ODAAT

Hi Matt

When I started gambling I was only betting 10 quid here, 10 quid there. But the stakes kept increasing because winning 100 quid became meaningless, I wanted to win a grand. Then as I earnt more money, winning a grand became meaningless, I wanted to win ten grand. I hope you don't go down the same path buddy. if you can gamble for gun, then that's fine bug I don't think I have ever been able to do that. I was trying to win life changing amounts and in the end, the effect has been life-changing. But not in the positive way I had hoped! Not only have I lost the money but I lost friends and I lost time that I should have been enjoying my life, instead I was sat glued to a computer screen for hours on end. I feel like 11 years of my life has been wasted. If I could go back in time and stop at the stage you are at now, my life would be Infinetely better. I would be reasonably wealthy, probably own my eon house by now etc. but instead I'm scraping around for change to get the train to work and scrounging off my girlfriend so that I can get something to eat.

Day 5 done easily enough. No temptation at all today.

Hi RB,

Well done on getting through those first 5 days.

Keep strong through tomorrow and then when that's done, get through the weekend..

All the best

Ade

Cheers Ade. Like most gamblers, the weekend is where I usually do most damage. I'm sure I'm not going to gamble this time though.

Hi Rick,

Thanks for your post.

No probs at all mate. It is a pleasure to help you on your recovery journey. When I read your first post, I knew that you needed help. I could tell how sincere your post was, and that you just need help to get your life back.

I was there too many times, don't forget that.

Your strength will grow each day, and hopefully you will keep going and just don't let complacency drift in. It can happen, so just be aware mate.

One day at a time.....

Ade

One week gamble free.

not feeling anywhere near as low as I was this time last week. hopeful that I can keep it up this time.

Thanks NT.

8 days now. Managed to get through the weekend Ok. Can't wait for these days to rack up so I can start to get myself out of the mess that I've got myself in.

9 days gamble free. Not really tempted at the moment but I've felt like this before and then placed one little bet that ends up being non stop gambling until all my money disappears so I'm not getting complacent, Just taking it one day at a time. Feel like I'm going to do it this time. I have to do it this time. I want my life back.

Brilliant on the 9 now 10 days gamble free rb

Welcome to double figures 🙂

Complacency won't catch you out if you stay on guard! Stay strong - ODAAT