Hi Everyone,
Today is day 20 gambling free.
Payday was always going to be difficult but I
did not gamble at all.
I gave up online bingo at Xmas but went mad on
scratch cards and horse racing.
I now know that I should not gamble at all as I definitely can not stop.
My eyes would be bloodshot from staring at the computer screen playing online bingo. It was the same when I played the slot machines in the amusement arcades. I could go in at 11,00am in the morning and not come out until it closed... at 1,00am.
It is nearly easier to accept that I cannot gamble at all than to try to limit it.... just doesn't happen.
I feel so much happier these last 20 days.
It was all secret gambling and I never told anyone.
My only fear is that I will come up with a new gambling craze that appears innocent enough but will spiral out of control. I went mad on e-bay after giving up online bingo!!
It is nearly easier to accept that I cannot gamble at all than to try to limit it or stop. I just cannot stop after a certain length of time or money level.
I live in the west of Ireland and have started counselling by phone.
Thanks for reading and best wishes.
Hi SuzyLemon
20 days is brilliant. I agree it is probably best to abstain instead of limiting it. It's trying to just smoke one cigarette a day instead of 20. You're right, it just doesn't happen. I too tried to limit time and / or money spent but always exceeded them. I can identify with the online gambling as that is the only gambling I did apart from the odd lottery ticket. Sometimes I would stay up all night and then had to go to work the next day, tired, miserable and full of shame and guilt. Not much of a life.
I hope the phone counselling helps you to continue with the good work.
Best wishes
Elfie
Day 22 now.... would normally spend hours on online bingo on weekend nights. What a waste!!
Now I read the recovery diaries instead. They really make so much sense.
Keep on posting everyone because your words do make such a difference to the new members.
I read the forum for a quite a while before I decided to quit... it gave me such hope.
Have a great weekend all.
Hey Suze....Your the 3rd Suze on here tonight...Come and join our gamble free gang!
Wishing you all the best my love...Together we can *** it eh!
Gambling is such a fools game, stick with this site and can guarantee you will make it. Just look at some of the diarys. Keep going girlie... we can do it!
Womble xxxx
Day 25 gamble free today and it feels so good!
Told a good friend today about my gambling problems and she was so helpful.
She was quite surprised as she thought it was only men who gambled!! She says I can call anytime I get an itch to gamble...
Zero gambling for now and always.... not even a lottery ticket for me now.
I cannot win because I cannot STOP.
I kept saying "but I might win".... sometimes I did win but could not cash in.
Never heard the phrase "I cannot win because I cannot stop" until I read it on here.
Its so simple yet it is doing the trick for me now.
Have a lovely evening and be good to yourselves.
Don't beat yourself up about the past, if you're on this site you're on the path to a very happy future.
Congratulations on been gamble free for 25 days think I need the same mindset as yourself in that zero gambling not even a lottery ticket . Day 6 for me and I hope I am as positive when I get to day 25 as you are the last 3 or 4 lines on your post made me smile and made me think how without gambling we can all be so much more positive and happy .
Hey Suze,
It's really good to talk (sounds like an ad..lol)
Keep going, each day it gets easier.
Keeping the diary updated daily really helps.
Womble xx
Today is Day 29 gambling free. Not a penny spent & no new bad habits formed.
It seems you can over-exercise or start mad shopping sprees as a replacement for the gambling. Best to do everything in moderation works best in the long run.
I have to learn to do things in moderation as I usually fling myself into things & overdo them.
If I learn a new recipe the kids end up being served it for a few weeks! Ha-ha
Gotta learn to keep the menu varied from now on.
Have a great weekend everyone and be good to yourselves.
Hi Suze,
You made me laugh...I am just the same, Heck who cares...fancy mushroom pasta 7 days in a row...lol
You are doing really well. Keep writing your diary....Really helps!
Womble x
I think that what you say at the start of your posts about replacing one craze with another is so true. I used to gamble quite heavy online and then went onto betting on virtual horses and now in betting up to 100 a time on virtual horses or dogs. I mean how ridiculous does this sound... IM taking action and am going to self exclude from all bookies i go to because i think i have had a wake up call before it was too late and in not going to take this opportunity with both hands!
Hi All,
Day 35... feels great!
Don't miss the gambling at all. Filling my free time doing regular stuff.
Started counselling.
It is working out really well ...I need to learn as much as I can about myself to understand why I gambled.
I am going all-out to kick gambling right out of my life!
Have a lovely weekend and be kind to yourselves!!
Hi Suzy,
A belated welcome from me to the diaries...glad to see that the first month has gone well, it sounds like you're really getting to the root of the problem, and also doing really well fighting off the urges to even think about gambling.
Recovery grants many things, and more time to do other stuff is certainly one of those gifts. Have a great weekend, hope you can be kind to yourself too.
Ryan
Hi Suzy
You are doing great and your post is so positive
Very well done on your days
Suzanne x
Day 39.
I have started to tell my immediate family members that I have given up all forms of gambling.
The local horse racing festival starts here next week and all the locals go along.
I will be going one of the days but have made it clear that I will be keeping my money in my pocket. There is more to the festival than betting and I will enjoy the other aspects.
This year I will be the winner because I have stopped all forms of gambling. I wish to live "within my means" and no longer dream of a big win. I have learned so much in the last 39 days and am loving it!!
Thanks to all who post your kind words on my diary.... it means so much to know I am not alone.
Hi Suzy
You are doing so well. I have been really busy so thought I had better catch up with all the recent posts.
I always felt that I was alone and longed to be 'normal' but now I realise that we here are all normal but have lost our way a bit.
Coming on this site feels like coming home - to people who understand.
You are not alone anymore, we are all here, routing for you.
Elfie
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