Do you have a healthy relationship with money? lets discuss

Hi

I now understaand that before my taking recovery program seriously I did not value money my self or realtionships.

Money was just the fuel for my addictioons.

Once I took my recovery seriously I got to understand that money represented days weeks months and years of me working for money.

I am like many other people that did not respect money or respect my self.

Yet my addiction was like working for years with out pay and have nothing to show for it but pains fears and frustrations.

Once in my recovery I got to write down what my needs were, write down what my wants were, and write down what my goals were,

How much time and effort was I willing to invest in to learning to respect my self.

How much time and effort was I willing to invest in to learning to love my self.

How much time and effort was I willing to invest in to exhcanging my unhealthy habits in to healthy habits.

While gambling I had very little to show for it but pains fears and frustration.

For me the word recovery means healing.

Once I started to abstain from gambling I had not changed how much I valued my self.

Once I started to abstain from gambling I then handed over all of our finances to my life and she gave me money each day for food or coffee.

Sadly in my mind I use to think that money represented control.

In time I got to value money and I was able to trust my self with money.

I think at this time I started to value my self and what m,oney represented to me.

Me in engaging in very risky situations also told me that I did not value my self my health or my life.

In time I got to understand that by me wasting money was me working in effect for nothing.

How would I respond if my boss asked me to work a whole month with out pay.

What would be my reaction to that suggestion.

Being in the recovery program I gave up being aloner who lived in many fears.

Love peace and sernity 

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham

Hi

Once in to my recovery I got to understand that I was very hard and unhealthy on to my self.

So as I got more productive I would ask my self have I done a good job.

Then made the decision to reward my self and to also encourage my healthy habits.

This rewarding our self is a form of encouragement and nurturing on our self.

I gave up the wording I have to.

I then wrote down what were my needs and what were my wants.

Money would not heal my pains.

Money would not reduce my fears.

Money would give me more material choices.

Thank you

Dave L

Hi Every one.

Money would not heal my pains.

Money would not reduce my fears.

Money would not help me to learn to love my self.

Money would not help me to learn to respect my self.

Money represented time it took me to earn that money.

I was in effect working for nothing and at the same time causing my self self abuse pains and fears.

The recovery program helped to learn to abstain from my unhealthy habits.

The recovery program helped to exchange each of my unhealthy habits in to healthy habits. 

Money gave me more choices to travel and material things.

I did not value money and I did not value my self.

The recovery program helped me to heal the hurt inner child trapped in the pains and fears of my past.

Love peace and healing to every one.

Dave L

AKA dave of Beckenham

Hi

Sadly money represented how much time that I worked to get it.

Because of the fear and arenaline rush I use to think that gambling was some thing I loved.

For me gambling was an arenaline rush and it was not possible to have a relationship with money.

For me the money weould give me more choices once I abstained from the unhealthy habit of gambling.

I use to think that money was a control issue for me.

I did not value money or my self.

For me in time I started to trust my self with more money and did not waste it.

For me also in time money did not burn a hole in my pocket.

Only once I started to love myself could I start to love other people.

Only once I started to respect myself could I start to respect other people.

In time I understood that because of the pains earlier in my life that pains caused fears in me that I did not understand. 

For me gambling was a very unhealthy habit.

For me gambling was a form of self abuse.

I was not dumb stupid or bad I was just a very emotionally vulnerable person.

In time my war stories stopped about money lost.

In time my war stories turned in to some deep therapies where I would see and feel my self in other people.

For me deep therapies led to less fears, more understanding, more able to articulate my feelings and my emotions.

I was able to exchange my unhealthy reactions in to healthy intereactions with my self and with other people. 

The more wise I got about my self the more I would see and feel my self in other people.

I got to go to meetings because I both wanted and needed them for me to become a much healthier person.

Some might think that money will make you feel more successful.

For me being successful is about my healthy actions and my healthy words.

Today I do not want or need to hurt my self or hurt other people.

Today I do not want or need to gamble.

Love healing and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham