unsure if this is the place to post this or not.
I'm the compulsive gambler with the problem. Iv admitted it I'm seeking help and I am on here all the time looking and trying to stop gambling, so far Iv done really well and haven't gambled at all since the day it all came out 8 days ago.
My partner gambles and has had big losses in the past but it's me that really did wrong lately, we are having a tight month this month due to a really expensive stag do he went on. We are going to have to use credit card to get through the month.
So I check his bank account and see this month he's spent £200 he put £50 on the other day and has been betting with it for the past two days, he has nearly £200 worth of bets he could of cashed out with earlier but he didn't. It's all going to go, and we have nothing at the moment. I wanted to go to he cinema with him and my best friend Sunday but he is saying we don't have enough money to go I'm gutted. And FURIOUS however am in no position to have a go at him at the moment after my losses on his credit card of 8k.. He has just signed up to a new site and is now sat on the sofa slotting away while I'm sat here typing an essay on gamcare!
I feel this isn't fair but cannot be arsed with the argument if I was to say anything and am feeling so bloody crappy about it. I just needed to get it out really but I'm so mad.
Hi bex... it is a hard one to be honest, I know how u feel and the fact u feel guilty because u can't stop ur partner from doing the same as u is a bad predicament to be in, he will know deep down he is doing wrong but the only way to talk him around will be when he's not playing and at a quiet time when he's not in the zone, there will be no talking to him when he's in the zone trust me... please let us all know how how things are and keep strong hun u are doing so well being gamble free for 8 days, trust me it would be a lot worse financially if u were both gambling xx
We can't win because we can't stop! Xx
It is tough especially when your skint because all you want to do is win 🙁 if I can hold back he should and he should have more respect that to sit in front of me and do it 'on the sly' I hid it for long enough to know exactly what to look for
I'm so hurt and angry right now..
I have tried talking to him when he's not gambling but he's still so angry with me 🙁
Sorry, Bexsta, not what you want to hear but some hard choices ahead, same as for the rest of the f&f.
And possibly hard choices ahead for him, he's been on the receiving end of the consequences of your gambling.
At the moment, you and he are dragging each other down, treating each other as f&f are treated, lying to each other, blaming each other, possibly chasing each other's losses?
Do you want to stop gambling to the extent of actually doing what it takes to stop and does he? If so, you could try recovery together, ask his parents to help you manage your money, go to meetings together, install blocking software, downgrade your smartphones, use cash cards and not Visa. In short, turn this around together?
If you're not going to agree to do recovery together, would you do what it takes to achieve recovery for you? Which would mean all of the above plus setting boundaries as to what you will and won't tolerate from him?
It's a hard position to be in but your destiny lies in your own hands. You are responsible for the choices you make.
CW
Just give him a little while to cool down, trust me I know where your coming from, been there got the t-shirt, he will call down and he will forgive u, in the.mean time u just have to keep trying to talk to him while he's not gambling and he will come to his senses eventually trust me keep trying don't give up it will be worth it in the end hun xxx
Above post is fine, providing you do want the same cycle to continue. Nothing changes if nothing changes.
CW
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