The last few days have been misery. Instead of being happy I have a newborn I’ve been hit by this shocking habit / illness. My partner of 5 years has just opened up to me about this after I literally squeezed it out of him . He said he was sucidal and had hit rock bottom and found out he used all our savings amounting up to 20k and is in debt by 8k in his account . I wasn’t exposed to financial issues as in our joint account everything appeared fine . Now that I’ve lookrd into it deeper it hasn’t all along . I feel so stupid !!! What do I do !!!
Hi new mum. Safeguard your finances. Don't pay his debts. Look after yourself. I remember my second child was 6 weeks old and we were remortgaging to pay my husbands massive debts. He continued for 15 years. So doing that just allowed him to continue, get more credit. If he can't pay his debts he should call stepchange. Living expenses come first. I handle all finances, I give my husband cash for necessities, he gives me a receipt and change. GA for him, Gamanon meetings for me. You can get free counselling from gamcare for both of you. It's addiction, will never be cured only arrested. If he's concerned for his mental health he should see his gp. As if you are, you should get to a gp as well. Your wellbeing is important. Let him worry about the debts, they are his alone. Credit reports will show extent of debts. Tell family so that no one continues to fund his habit. Get help and support, don't think you can go it alone. He may try and persuade you to keep it a secret. He needs to address this problem and take action. If he's an online gambler he can sign up to gamstop, he should show you the email, he can do it for 5 years. You need to see his steps to get help, words mean nothing. Enjoy your baby, try not to let it ruin this precious time. Get some help.
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