I was really hoping that I wouldn't need to come back to this site again. My son had a problem about 8 years ago, we thought he'd sorted himself out and with my help he eventually paid 20k off. Recently we've noticed signs that he's gambling again, money disappearing and we've now found out he's applied for a PO number (I guess so no letters come to the house). He's 28 and keeps saying he wants to move out. He spends 90% of his time in his room only going to the gym. We are not sure how to approach this - he is an adult now with a really good job but we are so worried about how to deal with it this time. Last time he eventually came to me and asked for help but I don't think that will happen this time
Hi I have the same issue, 2nd time son been gambling. He has come to us and said he needs help and support as gambled thousands his savings. As his mother I wanted to shout and scream but I was in such shock again. We made him call gamcare where he has had some therapy sessions. We have taken control of his finances this time. He has admitted he is an addict and wants the help, I can only hope and pray this time it works but I was nieve before, I won’t be nieve again, I am on his heels. Has your son contacted gamcare? We also made him do self exclusion for 5 years. It is early days for us and I pray and hope. I have had dreadful anxiety over this sleepless nights, probably like you, it is so hard as parents seeing this happen.
@85uq9omisy I truly feel for you both I am a recovering addict of 12 years and put my parents and partner through very similar things and often I can imagine you feel helpless to this dreadful disease. For the gambler you are in your own little bubble and you don’t want anymore to burst that bubble, it can be hard to approach the topic with your son as when my parents did that or partner I got very defensive but go gentle with it and he might let you in.
The best things I can suggest which put me into true recovery are below, I know everyone is different but I personally feel to stay gamble free you have got to leave no stone unturned because this doesn’t just go away.
Self excluding from all local shop bookmakers by calling Moses
self excluding online for 5 years
number 1 ( handing over finances to someone you trust, this one was what put me into true recovery )
replacing your addiction with a healthy hobby as your addiction leave a big hole in your life
gamblers anonymous meetings - these can be quite daunting for people however they are not what people think and they really do help and you will be shocked that how many normal people who have the same struggles as you are just talking about there problems.
hope your son gets some help soon I know how hard it was for me it can be very lonely at times as you feel like it has such a grip on your life.
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