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Oh Gem I'm so sorry. I was really hoping he had turned a corner. You have tried so hard and don't deserve his threats. What are you going to do? I've been wondering how you've been doing and hoped that all was well.

Stay strong.

I don't know what to do. He keeps coming back and threatening me through the letterbox saying he's going to show me what a psychopath is. It's horrible. He's a complete monster when he's like this and he's desperate for his bank card. Thankyou for your kind wishes xx

Oh golly, I don't know what to suggest. Do you have anyone who could come over and be with you? If he knew you weren't alone then maybe he would give up?

He's gone for the moment and the calls and texts have stopped for now. This makes me feel sick because I know he hasn't got any money, im always scared he's going to do something stupid to punish me. There isn't anyone to come and stay but I think I'd rather be alone anyway, I wouldn't be good company for anyone. I just wish it would all stop, I always think I haven't got any tears left but here they are again! I'm sick of my children seeing me cry xx

Oh I really feel for you. It's good he has stopped. Will he spend the night elsewhere?

Hopefully if he doesn't become desperate for his bank card. I might just give it him but then I think, if I do he's gonna go to the casino and also get drunk then ill have the same performance but worse like last time. He makes me sick with worry yet at the same time I hate his behaviour, he is so selfish. I'm at a loss with it all at the moment xx

I know that feeling. Last weekend my husband didn't come home till 2 in the morning. I couldn't sleep for fear I would have the police at my door. They just don't think about anyone but themselves when they are in that mode.

I am so sorry you are going through this because of this disgusting and cruel addiction. It makes me so sad to see how bad it can make someone become. My thoughts are with you and i really hope it gets better one way or another whether it is him going and leaving you to mend yourself or him realising what he's doing. Try and stay strong.

Bex x

If it was me, or i was advising xomeone i know, i would say call the non emergency number, 111 i think it is, and tell them what he's said about coming back to show you what a psycopath is, tell them you are extremely concerned about his mental health recently and particularly right now, that you believe he will do something awful.

ring the gam care helpline too, keep talking things through

keep posting so we know how are you are, will be thinking about you often ( and probably up all night watching the cricket, so i will be looking in fairly often)

if a friend or family member can come and stay thats a really good idea

Thankyou everyone,

I think im going to ring gamcare when the kids go to bed. I feel so low. He's got what he wanted, his bank card, so he's gone and said he'll be back later. How can the man you love see what a mess you are and reply with "just kill yourself because you're a coward and you're weak". It's horrible and this whole situation is horrible. I'm back to the point where I don't even want to talk to my family because they get angry and I hate the conflict. I'm just going to put the kids to bed and have a cuppa and calm down.

Well for one thing the only one who is a coward and weak is him for ccontinuing ghe way he is. You are the strong one here even if you don't feel like it at the moment , as despite everything you are still getting up every day, doing everything for your kids and facing reality, one which you don't want to.you are and you will get through this.stay strong.

Bex

Thankyou so much Bex. He came back kicking off again so I had to call the police. They have taken him to his mum's house and advised if he comes back he will be arrested. All I asked was for him to stay at his mum's for the night and we'd speak tomorrow when he was calm but instead he wanted to try and bully his way into staying here. I wouldn't have got a wink of sleep with his unpredictable moods and he'd have wanted to argue all night. I'm exhausted.

It sounds like you need to split up for the kids sakes. It's not healthy for you or them. I'd also inform the police about what he said and all the threats he makes towards you.

I told them everything, when she asked I answered honestly. I know in my heart it's not healthy and i've tried and tried to help him but he needs to help himself now, it's beyond anything I can help with.