Epic Fail

Telling people you want to end your life is a desperate cry for help. You know as well as us that you won't do it, else you'd have done it (I speak from experience), but take today as a new start.

How do you get round the blocks? You need to start putting blocks in front of the blocks - even if it means telling someone to keep an eye on you on lunch breaks at work, or setting passwords on your devices, taking control of your money etc.
Your fiance doesn't understand? SEND HIM HERE! There is a friends and family section which will benefit both of you, and should make him realise just how serious this addiction is. If you were addicted to heroin, or a raging alcoholic, there would be external signs that would jolt him to worrying about you and taking action. There is none of that with CG's so all too often it's shrugged off, ignored, insinuated that it's all in our heads.

What do you gamble on? It sounds to me like you can't quite commit to quitting, there are obviously some gaps in your blocks - ask yourself if that was subconsciously intentional or are you just that bit more devious in getting around them? I know for an absolute fact that I can't gamble online (home, phone or work) and that's just fine with me, it's rock solid (password set by my other half) and it's a RELIEF, not a BURDEN knowing I can't do it.

Tell us a bit more and I'm sure we can help. The only thing we can't do is quit for you, you need to want your life back.

Kev

Well i am going to give this a go, i toldmyfiancee,he was't happy but understands that we have to go through everywhere block and stop me gambling,thanks Kev123 for stopping and taking the time to listern to me. I have relasped quite a few times ,it doesn't mean i ever going give up quiting. It has been harder to quit than i thought and all that money i have wasted. I am going to Gam anno meeting and anythingelse i can do to stop me gambling?

I know others talk of k9 to stop gambling websites...is that how you gamble. Get your fiancГ©e to sort it so you don't know the password. Get him to hold debit/credit cards. Be accountable to him or another family member/friend for how you spend your money. Come on here daily, get involved, there is so much support to be had, come on 'chat' on an evening. Believe you can give up, don't give the robbing gambling industry any more of your hard earned money. Come on liggypops, get some self respect and self belief back

Are you still living near me liggypops?

Well sticking to it so far,yes i am going to goto gam annon ( it'sok OFC i need to do this part on my own ) but thanks anyway . Blocks are properly i place now and my othere half isvin control of finances .

Hey,

I had my relapse after 67 days. Blocks were not tight enough so made them stronger. That got me through 250 days. Circumstances have changed and very little blocks. So used to them I don't even contemplate gambling. They aren't there, but I imagine they are. Never had to test them since relapse so sticking with that! Dangerous? Yes! But it's the recovery that works for me. Altered mind state. Knowing what I'd lose if I gambled again, not being that person! The psychological blocks are bigger than the physical ones now!

Take care!

Abet

Great, keep doing it.

Thank you for your kind words of encourage meant,i knew this was never going to be a easy thing to do but i WILL CONQUER THIS.

Hi Liggy,

That's the spirit! I see a relapse as a part of recovery and working out what is right for me! I used K9 but got around it as I knew the password. The second time I wrote loads of jibberish, copied it, put it as my password, set up k9 then deleted the gibberish. To this day I still use K9 on my laptop. I don't think I will ever stop on subsequent machines. I don't have router blocks but K9 does the job.

My credit card companies still won't authorise any gambling website transactions, which again I will always keep. It means I can have financial control but at the time if I had someone I could have given it to then I would have.

While some blocks have gone, I've learnt no matter if it is days, weeks, months or even down the line, the essential blocks never let up. They are engrained in my psyche now with the biggest fear being letting down my family and friends and becoming introverted. Money can always be repaid but relationships take a lot longer to fix and some are irreparable. I luckily caught it before any of that, the only one I was hurting was myself, but no now longer. As the time passes, the urges go and the need to rely on blocks do too. But it's nice to know the essential blocks are still there in case I have a moment of nostalgia! Keep posting, you'll get there!

Abet

Thank younfor your post,like you i am still at a point where i can still turn it around,yes i am a little debt but if i had kept going the way i was soon i wouldn't be so fortunate. Yes i know it's hard to give up gambling and i have relasped but i know i am going to dothis,all blocks are in place now and i am doing my best tp pre occupy myself,bloging eveyday helps

I havent gambled in two weeks yipppeeeeee (sorry it mightnot mean much to you but me it means EVERYTHING!!!*)

Hi Liggypops

Well done on 2weeks GF, I myself am currently on day 28 GF I have not gone this long for around 15 - 18 months. Ive got a lot of other stuff going on and not thought of gambling to be honest but know it will rear its ugly head at some point and I have to be strong enough to deal with it when this happens. My new moto is "it's good to talk" and take it one day at a time. I shall look forward to reading future post from yourself and keep strong we can beat this addiction/illness.

All the Best

Darren

well done liggy pops , REALLY WELL DONE , i can tell from your post ur were right down there in the grip of it all and not wanting to let go , ill love to be able to do 2 weeks , struggle with 2 days but you are a inspiration , keep posting sweety x

and well done darren mate , i can feel your strength and determination