Hi everyone.

Hi Cai

Welcome to the forum and firstly admitting you have a problem and want help, that in itself is a massive step forward. I completely understand what you are going through although my addiction was online slots and for a much longer period. You are fortunate in that you are still very young by comparison to a lot of people on this site which means if you can stop now your future will be bright and have a much lower impact on future plans.

I probably started around your age now and am now 34 and still battling the addiction. I am on day 21 after having made some big changes recently which helped with recovery but didn't stop me from having a slip. What's important is getting back on track and using them as a learning curve to put in even more measures to stop it in the future.

Have you put in place any blocks? Or spoken to someone close to you as this often helps take a huge weight off, just being able to admit it and not keep it as your little secret. I have tried to stop on many occasions but each time slipped back into old habits. I feel this time it's slightly different, I have the support and understanding of my daughter which wasn't really there before and now I have told her everything including lies I've told in the past, types of behaviour I would show like saying I'm I'll so I could stay in bed all day and not face the world. I wanted to ignore everything around me, not take responsibility and live in a dream world, unfortunately that doesn't make anything easier.

My advice to you would be to try and work out the reason you gamble, what triggered you to start and try and understand these. I think it's very important to understand why we do it, what you're triggers are and what can you do if you get a trigger.

I don't think anyone can successfully beat this addiction on their own and need various forms of support as being lonely just increases the urges to gamble. Try to draw a line on the losses, the past and all the things that have happened as a result of gambling. I'm not saying forget about them but it is important to forgive yourself for the things you have done in order to move forward positively.

What's done is done and you can't change the past but you can use it positively to inform and shape the future.

Stay strong.

Bex

Hi Bex, thank you very much for your response and kind words. It's nice to know that I'm not in this on my own. What exactly are blocks can I ask? I've self excluded myself from a lot of betting sites, seems like when I lose,I self exclude but it's not exactly hard to open up another account on another site, that's where the problem is. As for why I gamble, I'm not exactly sure.. it's just something I've always done, I suppose it's the thrill of the big win and looking forward to watching the matches come in (I mostly bet on football) I suppose I just need to seek another hobby or interest to divert my attention, for me it's almost like gambling is a hobby and a past time when you're bored.. well done on your recovery, I wish you all the best and I take great encouragement from the fact that people can beat this.. kind regards, cai.

Hello Cai

Welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing your story

As you were encouraged to find out why you gamble, I just wanted to add that we offer a free counselling service which may help you work out why you are gambling. If you feel it would help to speak to someone privately then you can call our free helpline and speak to one of our advisers on 0808 8020 133. They would be happy to help you look at counselling and other options available to you. Alternatively you could use the netline, both links are below.

http://www.gamcare.org.uk/support-and-counselling/face-face-counselling/what-counselling

http://www.gamcare.org.uk/support-and-counselling/frontline-services/netline

All the best

Cade

Forum admin

Hi Cai

Blocks are what you put in place to prevent you from gambling and I've listed all the ones I can't find of below. Some may work for you, some may not depending on your circumstances and only you know what will be enough to stop you from gambling when you get the urge.

Firstly as I mentionedbefore, telling someone close to you to finally get it off your chest.

If this isn't an option then consider attending counseling from this site or going to a local GA meeting, you'll be surprised how much better they can make you feel once you get over the initial nerves.

Exclude yourself from all sites you use so you don't feel tempted at a vulnerable moment. If bookies are an issue then there is a national line you can call to self exclude from all the bookies in your area. I'm not sure of the number to hand but have seen it on others posts.

If you have someone close who you can tell, you can use blocking software which you can download on to your phone, laptop, tablet etc which prevents you accessing gambling websites. If you get someone else to do it then they can set the password so you physically can't access any siteseven if you wanted to.

You could consider opening a new bank account that only has a cash card to stop you being able to do online transactions or if you need to have direct debits etc, you could cancel your current card, order a new one and get someone to scratch off the 3 digit security code so you cannot use it for online transactions but still can use it in shops etc. This is what I have done and it's great as I can't gamble online even if I wanted to.

Maybe try and think about what you enjoy doing in your free time other than gambling and find some hobbies to fill your time constructively and something I've done is set myself some achievable goals that I could forfil if I don't gamble. You need to give yourself self something positive to focus on other than gambling.

I hope some of this may be helpful. Here's to another day gamble free.

Bex