Hi everyone

Hello everyone

i broke my hip over a year ago and while at home, never been a gambler ended up spending in excess of 7k over a year on online slots

this was so daunting to me as I don’t know how I got there as I haven’t ever really gambled. I was lucky as I was living with my parents parents and was only paying £300 rent a month I registered on Gamstop and for a few months I was ok.

about 6 weeks ago me and my partner moved into our own flat, I even had 1200 saved in a rainy day fund. I got scammed buying a car privately, it really took a hit on me and I had a relapse, in the short space of 6 weeks I now have over 20k of debt (Monzo loans, credit cards, flex.. ) I was using a foreign casino which allowed me to use credit cards

6k of that debt I had from before and have been paying of monthly for years but all together it’s now over 20k 

I hit rock bottom last night I used 1.5k of my credit card to try win the money back I knew I never would. I woke up this morning and I broke down to my partner. I had told him about the previous time but this time I thought I could control it but I can’t. 

it’s so daunting as I suffer from quite bad anxiety, the joke of it is I was so worried about the money I lost worrying about bills ect that it led me to gamble I almost want to slap myself because it’s so stupid that that’s what brought me here

my job pays 2200 a month and after rent bills and the debt I still have about £400 a month disposable. I’m going to try to put more towards the debt each month and do overtime where I can. 

I pay 500 a month towards the debts and have worked out it will take me just over 3 years to pay everything back.

it doesn’t help that I worry about things like what if I lose my job, what if I get ill, what if I don’t get commission one month. 

im 34 years old and the prospect of pretty much not having a life for the next three or so years is daunting but I know there are people worse off than me so I have to be grateful. 

wish me luck all 💜