2014 Challenge

Checking in on day 118 - Gamble free and urges still at an all time low. Hope everyone is staying strong and life is going good for them.

Hey everyone - that's check in closed for this week!! Update will be on at some point on Sunday morning. There will be a small window of opportunity between now and around 8.00am on Sunday for late check ins to be made.

Goodnight all,

Mr B

Morning everyone,

I’ve got really mixed feelings about the update today. The cup half full in me is absolutely buzzing that I’ve got 34 other soldiers to walk alongside in my personal journey to beat problem gambling……and that they are amazing enough to want to share their journey with me and everyone else. However, the cup half empty side of me can’t help but feel disappointed and let down by us having our statistically worse week ever as a group. The logic in me says that holidays, sunshine, Commonwealth Games and with growing length of recovery leads to less dependency on the Challenge and the site overall. I actually asked myself for the first time last night, “why do I bother?”………….but the emotional and moral/principled side of me says that we all made a commitment………and maybe that means more to me than it does to some others. Then I remind myself - I can’t influence what I can’t influence.........I choose to celebrate my ongoing journey and those of everyone who checks in alongside me - that’s why I bother…….and that’s why I will continue to bother between now and the end of the year - and beyond!

Many thanks for the lovely comments to Mother Brightside - she was really nervous about her spotlight - hopefully some of her words will resonate with us and give a great insight into the “other side” of problem gambling. To those who have mentioned it……yes, I am very very proud of her and realise how lucky I am! If you missed the spotlight and would like to read it, then you can find it on Page 374 in the post by OutOfTheCage.

In the update this week we’ve got the usuals of Headlines, Milestones (last week and coming week), roll of honour and the tally of savings. We’ve also got the results of the 2 question survey we’ve been running for the last couple of weeks. Better get on with it then eh?

Headlines for this week……..

Our army has a high number of casualties with 12 soldiers not managing to check in during the week. With 33 of the 45 team members on the list checking in we managed a very low retention rate of 73% - our lowest ever……but still defying statistics! There are 35 soldiers marching into the new week that will see us saying goodbye to July and hello to August - monthly update next Sunday. The breakdown of the 35 is that 45 started last week, 12 failed to check in and we had 2 returning soldiers. We have broken through a huge milestone this week……in fact we have smashed it - it’s around our average days. Each one of us is now a theoretical Century Club member - we each have 111 gamble free days as an average! There’s also another first in that everyone is in double figures of clean days - well done all soldiers - we’re all on solid ground………..while we know it can change quickly, the foundations are laid and this group could be the one that provides the consistency moving into the last 5 months of the year! In the coming week our “money saved” pot will break through the 0.4m mark and at the same time the collective time we will have abstained over the duration of the challenge will break through the 22 year mark. Projecting the week ahead and we will march past 8000 clean days as a group……with the current 35 soldiers having contributed almost exactly half of that!

New and Returning Soldiers……..

For the second week in a row, no soldiers joined the ranks this week. It’s brilliant to see Chirst21 returning safely to base camp and also luckygirl just missing check in coming back to the ranks! Have a brilliant holiday lucky and of course I’ll check you in for the week ahead! Thanks for letting me know.

Del’s Countdown………..

For the next 2 weeks I’m going to separate out the achievements and count of our team member who has got the longest number of clean days under his belt. In 16 days time, on Tuesday 12th August (hope I’ve got that right Del!), Del will have been stopped gambling for 1 year! This week, tomorrow in fact, he celebrates the 50 week milestone. We’ve got a get together planned for Friday 15th August in Glasgow - everyone is more than welcome to attend - please email me for details!!

This Weeks Special Feature………..the 2 Question Survey Results

For the last couple of weeks we’ve been gathering testimonies on the biggest areas of problem gambling and what advice those with that “type” of issue would give to someone starting out on their recovery journey. As a reminder, here are the questions we asked……..

“post about what your main problem gambling area was AND what 1 or 2 things you would recommend to someone with the same problem area would be in order to stop.”

It wasn’t easy extracting common denominators from the answers - it served as a reminder that, with a few exceptions, while the main area of problem gambling can be the same, our journeys to recovery can be very different.

The headlines do provide some insights into why gambling can get a grip, even though it may have emerged from fairly tame and seemingly “harmless” beginnings. There were 20 soldiers who took the time to answer the questions - there were some brilliantly honest details given - thanks to everyone who took part. Online gaming is definitely the biggest problem area…….slots being the main offender. Interestingly, where “virtual money” is used, problems got significantly worse when the transition was made from actual cash transactions i.e. physically going to bingo, bookies etc. An underlying trend is boredom………..either free time available and gambling to fill the void………or gambling in a slow paced environment i.e. online bingo, and then graduating to something which could provide theoretical “big winnings” in short periods of time. More than 50% of responders had key problems online……another interesting stat is that from those who had predominantly physical cash transactions, only one person spoke about online activity as well. While I’m sure others would have been dabbling online as well, the online aspect of their forms of gambling weren’t really spoken about……it was the activity, i.e. Horse Racing or football, that was the key discussion.

To provide something meaningful, here’s a breakdown of areas and advice…….

Online activity - slots, casino, sports and bingo………

Three very strong and simple pieces of advice - self exclude, install blocking software and hand over finances to someone you trust. That knocks out 2 sides of the triangle and gives a great chance to abstain. Of course, if someone wants to gamble they will find a way……….same goes for stopping, if someone really, truly wants to, then taking action on the 3 clear suggestions will take you a massive step closer.

Football and FOBT’s

There seems to be a link between the 2 forms of gambling, with most probably the fact that FOBT’s are in such close proximity to football coupons! FOBT’s were mentioned by 4 respondents - makes you wonder if the other 3 were heavy gamblers before these hit the bookies? I know my loss of control is certainly associated with them, but not the soul cause. Advice from these guys are around self exclusion, honesty with family and relinquishing financial control.

Horse Racing (& Dogs)

3 of those who answered had their main problems stemming from horse racing (and dogs). The impression given was that it was less online and more being in the bookies making physical transactions. There was a unique form of advice given by 2/3rds of the guys and surrounded complete avoidance of the sport - TV, papers, websites etc. Financial control handover was also mentioned and is again a thread through all areas of advice and removing a side from the location/time/money triangle.

Not exactly ground breaking research, but once again reinforces some of the findings of previous surveys - tell family, self exclude, hand over finances, install software blockers………are all seemingly critical to give a fighting chance. One thing to note for someone reading this looking for advice - closing an online account isn’t a strong enough line of defence - you can re-open……self exclusion is a much farther reaching method of preventing being able to gamble online with a particular “favourite” site if you had one.

Milestones Celebrated in the Last Week……..

Congratulations go to all of our following team members who celebrated major milestones in the week that’s just gone by:-

lostafortune, kickitnow and Julio all marched through the 20 week mark!

Luckygirl became our newest member of the Century Club! A massive milestone and that takes us to 19 of the 35 current members in this exclusive team! More than half of the soldiers!

NoCrisis has now reached double figures of weeks in recovery. Doesn’t sound like you’re having the easiest of times NC, but you’re doing superbly well to refrain from returning to a world that will cause you infinitely more misery. Keep going soldier, it does get better.

Wolf57 has now broken through the 50 day mark and is over half way to Century Club membership!

Milestones Coming up this Week………..

Monday 28th July - Del moves on to 350 days gamble free and another step closer to the year!

Wednesday 30th July - Lady Baggins of Englandshire reaches 150 days!

Thursday 31st July - triangle and ringerbell both hit the 20 week clean mark!

Friday 1st August - SuzyLemon hits the half century and celebrates 50 days gamble free!

Saturday 2nd August - Hitthefan reaches a major major milestone and in moving onto 182 days, reaches 26 weeks and in other words half a year!! D70 also celebrates with double figures of weeks being reached!

Sunday 3rd August - As the curtain closes on the Glasgow Commonwealth Games, fitzy sprints onto 10 weeks of being gamble free!

This Week’s Roll of Honour………..

Here are the names and tallies of our courageous army:-

Names Days Clean

bornagain 222

Happy Days 227

lostafortune 142

Mr Brightside 231

Del79 349

rst187togo 36

Hitthefan 176

Luckygirl 101

Baggins 147

Triangle 136

Scambling 232

Kickitnow 144

NoCrisis 74

Chirst21 123

ringerbell 136

delboygolf 129

Drew2002 119

Gladsdad 113

Pinky333 41

Strange 79

Wolfgang 117

help2604 82

Shorty8 127

Julio 144

John64 58

D70 64

Mileend 29

Fitzy 63

Wolf57 52

Elfie17 34

Matty21 36

GamAddict 28

SuzyLemon 45

markieb10 13

mjc1974 61

Drum roll………total days free of gambling since the Challenge began……….

7983 Days = 0.39915 million GBP in our pockets………………..0 GBP in the bookies!!!

That’s the update for this week then everyone and check in for the new week is now open! Hopefully retention will come in at a high number.

Have a great and gamble free week everyone - if you are heading off on holiday at some point then please let me know if you’d like to be checked in……and have a brilliant time!

Mr Brightside

good morning everyone sorry for the late check in had some things going on but not to worry..i am now 29 days gamble free and feeling more and more relieved instead of stressed. keep it up everyone we are still here and going strong 🙂

Checking in on day 129

Great update Mr B. Don't get disheartened by the missed check ins. Having read the brilliant spotlight from your mum it shows just how much of an impact our actions have on those close to us. Because of this challenge that you started there are a lot more happy mothers out there, so that's got to make it worthwhile. The fact so many people have accrued so many days shows the impact this challenge has and I for one think without it I would have slipped up by now.

A lot of us will have read the spotlight and seen familiar things, we all have such similar stories. Its nice to see your mums side and its good to know that she has her son back and loads to look forward to. I'm looking forward to more contributions from Mama B.

Checking in on day 36, feeling really good. I'm loving updating my diary daily and see the numbers increasing, bank balance slowly going the correct way too, can't thank you enough for the continued effort you put into this group.

So what if retention rates are down! Without this challenge we would have less drive to abstain, look at all the positives coming out of this, hell who knows at the end of the year you could have helped 30+ people to stop for good. Give yourself a good pat on the back.

Mr B - another great summary, as ever. Please don't be downhearted about the numbers - remember it's quality not quantity, and what we have achieved as a group with your leadership is something to be very proud of.

I am convinced that it's all down to the weather - if you were to note on your spreadsheet the weekly average temperature I'm sure it would correlate with a falling-off of check-ins.

I know personally that these past few hot weeks have kept me away from the computer, busy with outside activities, and with my greatly advanced years just too darned pooped to sit in front of the screen.

I did try sitting at the keyboard with my feet in a bucket of cold water but something electrical happened and I now have an Albert Einstein hairstyle, (without the 'tache mercifully).

Big hoorays for all milestoners, especially our golden boy Delboy, but a special whoop-whoop to you Mr B for all your hard work and tenacity through all the ups and downs of this Challenge; remember - Dunkirk eventually led to D-Day!

Joanna

checking in on day 136

well done to all those who are commiting to the challenge

keep upbeat mr b

there's a lot of people who are commited and getting a lot out of this - myself included

thanks

Tri

Hi everyone just about got my head straight to post on here again...had a relapse managed to get to day 48 but gambled on and off for a few days...

I think I just took my off the prize, got complacent, let my guard down on a day off and because im going away for 6 weeks on holiday soon maybe saw a cheeky shortcut to win extra spending money! silly me! felt ashamed and embarassed that I let gambling win although no real damage financially only emotionally really.

I hope its a lesson learnt, day 1 again today.

Checking in on day 117 gamblefree.

sorry i really meant to find the time to answer the questions, but at the moment things really are not looking good both of Lou's parrents are very ill in hospital and her daughters wedding is in a week on saturday.

And I know that Lou is very scarred not just of her parrents might not make it to the wedding but they might dying in the hospital.

It's so bloody hard for me trying to build Lou up and knowing that it is for her own health not the best spending every day 6 hours and more in the hospital looking after her mum and dad.

I've been there in the summer of 2002 myself when my mum died 10 days before my birthday and 5 years later my older brother Peter and still now when I think of it the tears starting to run.

I just hope that Lou's parrents getting through it and hopefully having another few years.

I'm very proud of Lou not just for how much she cares about her mum and dad but also she keep telling me that she feels like having a drink but up to now she didnt touched any.

Sorry for writing my soul pain down here but it is all I can do at the moment.

A good and gamblefree week to you all

Wolfgang

Welcome back StoneRoses - just think, when your 6-week holiday is up you will be looking at nearly a half-century of gambling-free days. Keep going!

Hi All.

Checking in on Day 45.

Attending CBT sessions - they are giving me a better understanding of myself and my reasons for problem gambling.

Glad to be one of the soldiers!!

so blooming busy but at least it keeps me from gaming.

hi everyone. sorry for not checking in earlier but I've been at work all day today.

had a very low day on Friday with working long hours, being in pain and kids playing up as the holidays. on the plus side i didn't get any urge to gamble and that was one of my main triggers!!

i haven't gambled since Tuesday 27th may 2014. making 61 days 8 weeks 5 days!!!!

thank you mr Brightside for your support. with your support along with that of my family and friends i am feeling positive about the future.