A two-way agreement

Totally agree dave

Ive commented on newbies posts and hear nothing back.

Yes can only assume they have continued to bet so we just have to carry on abstaining ourselves and keeping in contact and supporting others who are always here expressing their successes.

Great work mba - keep up the good work.

I honestly believe a high proportion have a horrible loss and come here to sulk. Trouble is too many say it's ok it's ok when a few home truths would be far more effective.

Bottom line is you bet your money and take your chances - if you don't like losing or are losing what you blatantly can't afford to lose then you need to stop. Also get your head out of your backsides and stop thinking after lose lose lose you will magically start to win. You are buying entertainment no more no less - but it's expensive so stop moaning about the ticket prices!

It's a bit like saying - I hate damaging my lungs and carry on smoking then moaning because I am ill !

I will encourage people who genuinely want to change but can't be doing with those making no effort.

Dave

The issue I have Dave is that your applying a logical approach to a problem that there is often no logic to.

This thread is titled "Don't dismiss this" but you seem to dismiss another approaches to the problem. Your method seems akin to telling someone suffering from depression to "cheer up" and "count their blessings". It feels inappropriate to say people who post here in despair are "sulking" and need some "home truths".

I agree if people don't take action themselves they will never stop but you seem to have made this your personal crusade.

Hi DeLorean. Thanks for adding your thoughts.

I believe people need to be given all the support available but the point I am making is there are two sides to recovery and the person seeking help has to also make a proper effort if they are going to beat it.

I would never dream of telling someone with depression to cheer up etc but would be interested to know what small things they are trying to do to help their situation. If they said nothing then that's fine but they can't then expect to miraculously recover.

Logic or no logic the fact remains that to stop gambling it takes a concerted effort which involves seeking help and not just gambling and saying that's the way it is.

I am not expecting much agreement with me as people prefer to be told it's ok and when little / no effort is made to stop, again just be told it's ok.

The taking responsibility and putting barriers in place for when the urges occurred approach worked for me and several others so I suppose I am just trying to get others to give this a go to.

I have changed the title of the thread to something more reflective of the point I am trying to make!

Thanks again

Dave

Would you not agree that when someone takes the time to create an account and make their first post that this is their effort, nomatter how weak an effort you consider it to be?

So after years of gambling and the stresses that come with losing money you cant afford to lose and the debts and despair etc etc etc you think the process goes like this;

Introduce yourself on here

Receive advice on blocking software

stop gambling

.. wow didnt realise it was so easy!!

God knows why the gambling industry supports gamcare. Its really easy to stop this addiction!

... If only it was as simple as you think...

At the end of the day people are going to relapse, they need support from others who know what their going through not people looking down on them thinking their weak for gambling again.

After a relapse if everyone had your views they would potentially feel like an outcast on here because they didnt listen to your advice and would be ignored.

Giving up isnt easy if it was they would be no such thing as problem gamblers. Everyone would just stop after realising gambling just wasnt there thing. Thinking about it, it is their thing as if it wasnt they wouldnt do it. Just like smoking isnt my thing - hence I dont smoke

I was just trying to give a different perspective so will leave you all to encourage each other in the ways you see fit. Let's just hope nobody else makes the mistake of mentioning you need to take responsibility etc

I have probably exhausted the FOBT thread and regardless of what I say people will still play them so there is nothing more to add. It sounds selfish but I no longer play them (and haven't done so for almost 4 years) so not really my worry now. My barriers are in place so job done!

I wish you all well with your recoveries.

Dave

Anyone who follows my diary in the recovery diaries section knows i struggle with urges and temptation but that doesn't give me license to gamble

i like your new title Dave

Recovery or abstinence does require me to put in effort honesty and a bit of action

However if i do gamble again as the great philosophers say its what i do next that matters and im learning i need to get back up on that proverbial horse

But its not easy anything but to stop gambling and avoid that first bet

Yet if i want a better life that's what i must do

Even the gambling den's say gambling is entertainment. Even they say to set an amount of time and money you can afford to lose

So whats it to be?

Keep gambling or try and find a different way?

tri

Its not a mistake to mention about taking responsibility

as morphious said to neo in the matrix;

theres a difference between knowing the path and walking the path

Ultimately the only way anyone will stop gambling is by taking responsbility for the own actions but I can't ever agree with labelling people as "sulkers" etc.

That kind of language smacks of sneering at people often at the end of their tether. As we all know excessive gambling is often caused by complex emotional and personal issues that can't be solved overnight.

I respect any person on this site who says they have a problem , when they are ready they will address the problem

Hi Stephen2105 - thank you for adding your thoughts.

I read through your diary and can tell how hard you are fighting this - keep fighting and you will win.

I have been posting on here for 8 or so years and would never troll anyone or anything and on reflection think I have just forgotten how logic goes out the window when people are in the midst of the addiction and need to balance looking at things as someone who did manage to solve the problem with remembering what the journey is like.

If anyone has been offended by my forthright approach I apologise. I was genuinely trying to share the things I had to face head on to enable me to stop playing the roulette machines - particularly as they worked quite well.

I wish you all well with your journeys and recoveries.

Dave

Good response Dave

Purely my opinion but the hallmark of recovery is that I keep learning.

Sometimes I like to think I've stopped gambling and can go on my merry way and perhaps that is possible for some.

For others its different. Logic can go out of the door. Its baffling when it happens to you and you feel like your losing who you are as a person.

If you've never felt like this, I hope you never do. Its extremely unnerving.

Keep up the recovery work and hope life improves for us all

Tri

Thanks Tri - you have hit the nail right on the head. Keep learning and never be off your guard.

Well done for the great progress you have made and I look forward to reading many more of your posts.

Dave