Arguments.. Again

Hi Kimmii, good to see you posting here again,

You have come a long way my friend and you should be proud of yourself.

But your boyfriend has a right to be worried and upset; it's a bit like a former drug user having access to a small bit of heroin or C*****e every now and again, and using it in front of him.

It may feel like the odd £10.00 here and there, but can you honestly guarantee that, one day, it won't be more and you could potentially go off the rails? I would sadly say that it is almost certain to happen at some point if you carry on.

You have to question what you actually enjoy my friend; I devoted twenty years to gambling before stopping over five years ago. Since stopping, I write, sing, go hiking, do charity work and much more - these things give me genuine happiness and fulfilment that gambling never could. You enjoy something that doesn't really exist - it is a diversion, a distraction; you don't learn anything or achieve anything, even if you win.

Maybe there is something you can do together my friend; a new hobby, a new interest - however you feel, this isn't a healthy situation and you both need to move forward from it.

I had to change, I had to leave all forms of gambling behind, even pennies in a penny arcade are too much for you, me and everyone here; you are better than this, you are better than enjoying something that does absolutely nothing for you.

You are a good person, you are an intelligent person and you are young. There are a lot of open doors at your age; they won't always be there so I would take advantage of them - life and time is precious; don't give an ounce of it to something that is still probably doing you far more harm than what you realize.

JamesP

One sentence set alarm bells ringing in my head - "I hate losing to the point that I start crying". Common trait amongst us gamblers, we can't stand to lose, that's why we can't stop. We chase and chase and chase until we haven't got a penny left in our pocket. I was just like that, I couldn't even stand to lose a pound, it would eat away at me, I'd have to get even. But obviously I wouldn't get even, at least not all the time. Of course there are many people who are very disciplined in gambling, they lose they walk away they get on with life. But that sentence tells me that you might not be like that.

Perhaps gambling is not the main issue, is it your relationship that is causing you to gamble and making you feel in need of escape? I don't know that I'm merely speculating based on your post. I suspect your partner just wants to do what is best but only you know that.

I wish you the very best of luck in whatever you decide to do.

Rats enjoy rat poison until it catches up with them.

I went gambling recently, it was a harmless day at the seaside....but after jackpotting about 10 machines i started to feel i couldnt lose and started raising the stakes.

After losing a few quid i started to chase it and ended up going to the cash machine a few times...it ended up where the fun I'd had from the wins was lost and i was left with nothing but a feeling of stupidity.

I should point out that i never gamble in my own city now, never been into bookies and dont gamble online but I still get the urge.