Bad Boys (1995) Starring Will Smith

Probably should have dived into my brain to think of a more apt film but I have watched all four around 100 times and love them

So the topic is

Bad thoughts, bad actions, bad conversations - the addiction pull back

So I'm only 237 days gamble free but it's been a rollercoaster of laughter around my addiction and it's attempts to get me back in.

At first, I was waking up and thinking, must put my bets on or play slots which I dismissed.

Then I had dreams of relapsing and making a big win, dismissed that

So I consider this all to be direct on attempts. 

Then we moved on to thoughts of taking shortcuts in games like candy crush by buying bonuses. Thoughts of wasting money on things I don't need. Lack of respect for money, all dismissed.

I was placed to have a month in May where the addiction attempts weren't coming through so I thought that's it. Well that can be dismissed now. 

But last month, it took a new tact. A few instances have come up and I've told the truth but there was an element of the dragon breathing fire and telling me, oh that's uncomfortable, just tell a fib. The dragon is working over time on my tolerance, selfishness, ego and so much more so I need to watch out.

At the end of the day, as long as I stick everyday to connection, accountability, gratitude and routine then I can't gamble