Gambling will turn you into a zombie

That's a great post GMTB.

What I observed when just watching the goings on in a casino was actually really sad to see.  I Always remember the grim faces of people crowding round a roulette table...Sullen expressions..the late bets....the elbowing for position and regular disputes. The arguing and referring to the cameras. It didn't feel safe around that group if I'm honest with you.

People on other tables sat alone and just looking washed out or tired of it but unable to leave.  Obviously In and out of reality and I now have a better knowledge of the soup of drugs the body creates in a gambling environment

I didn't see a lot of people having real fun or entertainment but like any gambling den I find them seedy places. Always did really but my addiction was way more powerful to get me in there

I only went a few times in the earlier years usually invited by a work colleague or looking for an all night venue when depressed at night in the city. I have to say it was too much like a gambling environment for me and it required effort to get to one. Too many interactions with croupiers and pit bosses which has been interesting in my therapy as I'm obviously a loner or secretive gambler. The secret was part of the whole twisted experience.The bookies and arcades were deviously located where I could easily get to them

Same deal though and just as seedy in their way. I was so addicted that my dislike was on a back-burner so I could just stand at a machine. I hated being disturbed but ended up having the inane gamblers banter with someone crowding my space.....I felt like a geek because I don't have the banter....another reason why I faced a machine preferably in a more secluded corner.

Truth is I felt embarrassed by my actions and part of me seesaws in and out of reality, part of me was always in reality but the controlling part of me was away in a world of leprechauns and pure escape. Very confusing and mentally draining like an exhausting brain trip

So I get what you are saying and hope you won't go again even if invited

Best wishes for a gamble free life

Thanks for the replies

I think what makes the whole gambling addiction so dangerous is having so many avenues to get sucked into it

Boredom , curiosity ( this one i think is the starting point for a lot of people ) , greed , desperation , depression 

there is no one size fits all route into it

Ive taken a long time to understand addiction on the whole but it generally comes back to humans wanting some sort of  constant "buzz"or release or however you want to describe it 

Some choose drinking

some choose drugs

some choose s*x

some choose gambling

some choose eating 

These days the most popular buzz for a lot is social media again a little like gambling no obvious physical effects but scratch beneath the surface and you have more zombies addicted to finding out what people think of them 

I appreciate this is a gambling forum but we must understand nearly everyone is addicted to something we are a very very troubled species in general