Gone and done it again

@old-but-new I last gambled on Monday lost 140 pound then pawned something in i couldn't afford to do lost a further 150 and have been saying ever since January when my family found out and had suicidal thought  I'm done never gambling again and yet got myself into further debt and yet each week i gamble so don't think its just you who relapses 95% of gambling addicts relapse until they finally succeed in stopping.

As for the debt I'm going to be spending all my benefits pretty much paying it back for at least 3 years the debt including the money i stole even though family don't know the extent of it i will be about 35 or 36 by the time i get to live my life again. 80% of that due to a 2 half year gambling addiction. 

Fortunately my credit rating is so bad i can't get loans or credit cards.

You say you don't have the mental capacity to stop. well you had made a start you know you have a gambling problem you have made the first step in your recovery by admitting it. 

What is your living situation do you live with family or on your own?   

those fobt needs to be banned it very easy to get carried away as the way they are programmed and some of the staff working their think its amusing staying stuff like nobody forcing u to play since i did moses i havent stepped foot in any of those bookies as it was getting to a stage i would have ended up doing criminal damage i also dont like the people in those places as they always asking for money moses was the best thing i have done, first 2 months was tough and now i can walk past those places without even looking at them

@uq4978e3d2 to be fair i have been in recovery over 13 years i first started going to Ga 2011 and had many relapses on the way longest gamble free being 3 years and many 6 months before a relapse it only since my last relapse coming on here and not doing everything my way has made the difference my last relapse was awful and i recored how i felt on that day it was the first time i started a diary on here and made few changes to myself to get to this position, i also understand why i relapsed and what measure i have put into place so i dont make the sane mistake rather then brushing it to the side

I can relate to a lot of what has been said already.

Im 40 now and have been wasting tens of thousands on gambling since I was about 16. Ive had problems with alcohol, drugs, spending, debt, overeating, you name it. Its all part of the same addiction, seeking that dopamine reward in the brain.

Gambling is probably the worst. Theres no limit until everything is gone and its horrible. 

Im starting again. Good luck to us all!