How to be happy?

dear lucky0,

I am no expert on gambling but I do know a thing or two about depression. My advise to you is to go see your GP. You don't have to tell him about gambling ( but it may help) but he or she may be able to offer some antidepressant medication or councelling for your low mood.

Many people are reluctant to take medication, but what it can do is give a light at the end of the tunnel, to lift your mood enough so you can work towards happiness again. Everyone deserves to be happy.

I find getting out every day, enjoying hobbies (NOT self destructive ones) and engaging with friends and family again can really help, even if you don't feel like it you soon will.

Do you have a friend or family member you can confide in? My feeling is that you want to be happy and to be helped, or you wouldn't have posted.

It can be a long road, but you have taken the first step, it is the hardest one, be proud of that. go for a 5 minute walk tonight or in the morning, then do it again.

I so hope you will open up to the people who can help you, X

Hi Lucky0, I completely understand where you are coming from my friend.

I was the same; I gambled for twenty years before stopping over five years ago.

There is no question that you lose touch with how you lived and felt before; its not that you have changed but stress, worry, obsession, depression, anxiety and whatever else becomes the norm, the everyday; little else seems important.

It won't always be that way if you stop, zero tolerance, and push yourself to rediscover who you were. I felt lost and depressed after stopping; I wondered whether I really cared about anything or anyone after I had stopped gambling but you do start to change in time, you start to value money, you start to appreciate the simple things again like you did before you ever knew what it felt like to be trapped inside this vicious circle.

I knew I needed to push myself so I virtually forced myself into making some plans and follow through with them; now I do charity work, I write, sing, go hiking and so much more - these things give me genuine happiness and fulfillment that gambling never could.

The mind is like any part of the body when damaged; it needs time to recover, it needs time to recouperate; if you gamble, however small the stake, you aren't giving yourself a chance to feel any different my friend.

You will get there - take some inspiration from other people who have given up short-term; you do get little windows into how your life could potentially be after a while. Urges come and they go - if you "ride the storm", then it is another step up the ladder towards experiencing that.

I wish you well my friend, you can do this.

JamesP

I feel exactly the same mate, I've given up for about 6 months now but I have had a few slip ups and these are purely down to me getting bored and not being able to find interest in anything else.

Like you I'm no longer interested in going out and socialising although since those machines started eating every penny I earned I hadn't been able to go out for a long time but now I'm in a position where I can go out I just don't want to! I also just prefer to sit in my room on my own but I get bored very quickly, I can't really concentrate on tv or films, I used to make music to a fairly decent standard (had tracks signed by record labels) but I just have no interest in it anymore and I can't concentrate on games etc. like I used to either.

I'm at a total loose end with what to do with myself and feel very depressed all the time, I'm hoping that this gets better with time as at the moment I've totally lost the will to live. Sorry for not being more positive but just wanted to let you know that you're not alone in feeling that way

Thankyou all for the replies but I feel Arbee offered what I wanted to hear, just the feeling that someone is going through that same thing, I went out last night and ended up just going home about 1am, really wanted to go to the casino and just blow any money I had on me and I'm not even sure why, I can feel my urges coming back to me trying to make me gamble, I've resisted more than I used to but god

d**n it's hard, is there any way we could chat of this Arbee? Would help having a friend going through the same thing!