Having not had a bet for 17 months has enabled me to turn my life around, I have changed my approach to recreation as well as how I value my time and also how I have a new found respect for money.
I read in a book a while back that we are only as good as the people we hang around with, this does not include work as we are in many ways forced to engage, I mean friends that we have formed relationships with over the years.
Without sounding like a snob, if you break into cars etc it is more than likely that you will be hanging around with other similar types of people, not the type of people that will enable you to have a stable, balanced and honest life going forward.
Whilst I have no friends who have or do behave like that I do have friends who gamble. Now it was never an even or balanced conversation with someone who has stopped gambling is talking to an active gambler, in fact it can be hard work because most of their chat is about betting, what they have won, what on and when, they are still heavily engrossed in it.
They cannot watch sport unless they have a bet on it, nor can they really understand that you have stopped and plan to keep it that way. You are trying to get your friend to stop like you, however you cannot force anybody to do anything unless they want it themselves.
Because of the above I have decided to not see my friend as often as I used to. You see I no longer wish to be surrounded by gambling or people who have no wish to stop. At times I felt like my friend was testing me and my ability to stay stopped, whenever I mentioned that I was still clean he would go quiet it was like he was shocked, imagine how he felt when I said I was 17 months clean? Some people resent the fact you have stopped because they are unable to and honestly they have not really tried.
If you was a drug user who stopped why would you hang around friends who were still using drugs?, it’s the same as most addictions including alcohol. Sometimes you have to make hard decisions with friends and family, you do not have to close the door completely on these friendships, just keep your distance and control it so that your not put at a disadvantage.Â
Sometimes to protect ourselves we have to move away from others.
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Hi
THat is a very healthy decision.
Dave L
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