I just can't stop!

Thanks for that! And You're right I need to know the reasons behind it!

Hello sorry to hear your pain all I can say is GA has transformed my life. I hated the world, I hear some say it's a social thing for me if you were standing too close you were the reason I was loosing my concentration was soley on my machine, I can't tell you when it changed from a social flutter to leaving myself without food! I pushed everyone out of my life as my fear was I'd get found out what a waste of space I was, plus I couldn't borrow of them so that's all I needed money & the big win!! So lost in my world of pressing a button and touching a screen years passed where I got more anxious my sleep was affected I was forgetting the lies I'd told the week before and felt my only chance of freedom was to call it a day, thankfully my attempt did not work but in hospital I thought how can I leave my kids with this to cope with, sometimes through my self absorbment I think it's all about me ITS NOT I'm hurting everyone I lie to & deceive I have to accept that, my last bet was 28/102015 thankfully I knew I was powerless over gambling and this same addiction let me to believe I'd be better if dead! I got to as many meetings as I can because GA does not judge me, I hear the same pain I suffered I hear that life on life terms can be a struggle but coming to meeting and talking about it gets me through another day, I have no reservations regarding "controlled gambling" for me it's black n white don't gamble on nothing and take yourself away from triggers I've met some lovely people in the rooms and the ones who do service, share honestly seem to be getting their lives back they sleep at night and accept the money lost and the time loss is that LOST can't change it BUT you can have a say in your future with the courage of getting help. I wish you all the best my names Julie and I am a compulsive gambler,

Thank god that your attempt failed and you are now free of this horrible addiction. And you can move forward with your life! And put that time lost gambling into something more constructive. I think the biggest hurdle for a gambler is the thought of winning big and getting yourself out of this nightmare! This is like my 4 attempt at quitting! I thought I had cracked it last time but I only stopped because the money ran out! Thanks for your reply Julie