Hello everyone,
I am 23 years old and started gambling at the age of 16. Like many others i started with football bets, on a saturday afternoon 1 or 2 pound at a time. 7 years later i have been gambling heavily for what feels like my whole adult life. I have lost a girlfriend who stood by me for 3 years and it has affected relationships with a number of friends and more importantly my family.
I have had one big win of around £10,000 about 4 years ago now and have absolutely nothing to show for it. I have borrowed from any place possible. Friends, family, girlfriends, loan companies. I am now on a debt management plan to pay off debts i owe to loan companies around £10,000, and still owe family and friends £5000.
I have only recently realised how much gambling has genuinely affected my life. I look at my friends, getting mortgages, getting married, and all i have really thought about for the last 7 years is gambling, gambling and gambling.
The worst part is the lies i am telling to family, friends, and myself. It is ruining my relationships with my family especially and i hate myself for that. I want to be open and honest about my problem now and stop it for good.
I am serious now about changing my life and stopping gambling for good before it is too late. Tonight i am going for my first group meeting for compulsive gamblers. It is the first group meeting i have ever attended, having tried one on one counselling a couple of years ago.
Any help or support from other members would be appreciated. I will keep updating this post until i am finally gambling free.
Hi Mate, I can totally relate to your story so thought I would send you a message!
I started to bet like you at 16 on horses/football but never ever had a problem. The problem for me was online casino slots which I starting using around 2/3 years ago. I got myself into £10k of debt & I regard myself as a sensible guy! Good education, job etc but can affect anyone.
The problem is breaking the cycle of chasing the losses because the money is never coming back. You have to think of everything you will lose in life by continuing, that's what's made me give up for good. You need to do it for yourself first and also your family.
It's nearly impossible to just give up overnight with no help or support & as nobody close to you knows you should really consider telling them so you d have some support. It's brilliant you've decided to go to group therapy and talk to others going through it or that have been there.
At the end of the day you have to want to stop more than anything else or you will end up so far in debt, losing everything & the future will look even more bleak!! At the moment you still have so much going for you and because your feeling low and gambling has taken control you can't see it. Honestly I promise with Help and determination you can get your life back on track mate and have the future you want so bad.
Goodluck mate and please keep me updated how it's going with the meetings and how your feeling. Take a day at a time & it does get better.
All the best mate
Paul
Thank you Paul means a lot. Went for my first session last night Every story that was told was relatable. Day 9 now without gambling. Still very early but I feel like this time is different. Feeling pro active like I want to do it for myself, rather than just to please others.
Mate same I am the same as you came here to try and stop doing this I got 20 days until this morning I relapsed and just lost £700 I've just put my last day gambled to 0 days but coming here will help you and people like us I'm gonna try and get to 40 days now it's hard but can be done look after yourself mate
That's good that you want to do it for yourself because that's your main objective to do it for yourself first others second. That's a good mentality as well take one day at a time and before you know it you will have gone a month then 2 and so on. Really pleased that you seem positive and have a determination to it.
Keep it going mate and keep us upto date!
Paul
Hello Gambler1812
Well done on reaching 9 days gamble free. Did you tell anybody about your situation? I saw you mentioned you'd like to be open and honest with family and friends. The best thing I done was tell my gf and my parents about my gambling, from then on i knew i was serious about stopping gambling. Probably the hardest thing I ever done was to come clean, as hard as it was i know now that I don't ever want to have to tell my family I've relapsed and got myself in trouble again. I'm about 16 months gamble free and telling people certainly helped.
16 days gamble free. Just been to my second meeting with the group again. Feeling more positive as each day goes. Got paid on Wednesday. And although a lot of t went to my debts I honestly feel the happiest I have in a long time. Still a long way to go to get to where I want to be. Will keep updating. Thanks for support.
Well done mate, keep going. You can do it. You'll enjoy life so much more without gambling.
Well done, you're doing great
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Missed the group meeting tonight. Feeling down. Had a bad week. Not gambled in 26 days but feel bad for some reason. Trying to remain positive but still owe a lot of debt which makes it hard.
Feeling down won't help but it is natural when we think of debt...Pick yourself, you have done 26 Days, be proud of that. Can you get to a group over the weekend? well done for coming on here.
Juliex
hi mate just reading through your story and I can relate so much,
I am 28 now but first tried to stop gambling around 23 and wish to God I had stopped then I thought I had been through the worst of it but I had only scratched the surface, you seem like you where on the same path as me so I would advise really kicking your heels in mate and try arresting this illness before more carnage and debt enter your life,
you are doing great 26 days is a massive achievement, just take 1 day at a time the debt might seem hard to deal with for now but once it's paid off your getting a new start with a much clearer mind!
get yourself to another meeting mate
matt
Hi I empathize with your story, to have a gambling habit is yet worse than any drug addiction, to be moody and sad all the time to be perpetually skint is nothing shy of a curse and is mental torture to then achieve what it should be the goal we fight so hard for a win and then blow it right away or buy pointless stuff we don't really need what is it that we are after? The feeling of being powerful how can we replace that I want to find out but something I know for sure is that as strong as we might be because you have to be strong to survive a gambling habit with all the despair that comes with, you aren't as happy as before I'll rather be happy than be a few quid on profit because that happiness only last for seconds but the price to pay is to say goodbye to your emotional well being for God knows how long I say f*k gambling, and f*k the bookmakers particulary.
Hi I empathize with your story, to have a gambling habit is yet worse than any drug addiction, to be moody and sad all the time to be perpetually skint is nothing shy of a curse and is mental torture to then achieve what it should be the goal we fight so hard for a win and then blow it right away or buy pointless stuff we don't really need what is it that we are after? The feeling of being powerful how can we replace that I want to find out but something I know for sure is that as strong as we might be because you have to be strong to survive a gambling habit with all the despair that comes with, you aren't as happy as before I'll rather be happy than be a few quid on profit because that happiness only last for seconds but the price to pay is to say goodbye to your emotional well being for God knows how long I say f*k gambling, and f*k the bookmakers particulary.
Hi mate, wanted to say congrats on going nearly a month now GF!! It's a big achievement on your road to a better life. You will have days sometimes even weeks when your feeling down as it's daunting paying back a lot of your debt but you have to look at all the positives. Your still determined to be GF and are nearly a month in now without a bet. Your being pro-active in going to meetings and talking to people about your issues as well as posting on here. Also your paying off your debts which although at first it seems like it will take forever to pay off it does surprisingly go down and look better every month.
Keep doing what your doing mate and stay strong as you can do this and your life will just keep getting better.
Take care
Paul
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