Hi all!
My name is Lucy and I am feeling very proud of myself right now, even if it is only two weeks free from gambling - I know it's early days still, but I can just tell that this is it.
A little background - three years ago I had my son, I had a really traumatic time with the birth/aftercare which led to me secretly dealing with postpartum depression as I didn't want to burden anyone with my issues, so on the outside everyone thought I was fine, but inside I was struggling all the time. Pretty much the same time my son was born, my partners Auntie (who was his only family member apart from his Mum) died unexpectedly, and he started to suffer with depression for a while after that. I also reluctantly returned full time to work after 9 months and, without anyone else knowing, I started to gamble secretly, as a form of escapism.
In the beginning it didn't seem a big deal, I have a decent wage, I was still able to live rather comfortably despite blowing hundreds and hundreds a month... then it happened. My partner was spending more time in the evenings watching football upstairs, baby in bed, long day at work done with a few wines in me... I blew £500 in one night on slots. I was in a state of shock. I didn't sleep that night - I had blew the rest of my money for the month in the space of two hours. I had a great credit score so I applied for my first ever loan of £1,500... I won't bore you with too much info, as I think you can guess how the next two years went for me... long story short, went from zero debt to £9,000 (which no-one knows about to this day, I am secretly on a plan with StepChange)
One month ago I decided that was IT - now I feel back to my once happy and optimistic self. I'm so glad I've had my wake up call - and I want anyone who feels like they need a friend to reach out to me xÂ
Keep focus!! 14 days will soon turn into 40 and so on keep at it ever need someone to talk to I’m here I’m only on day 3 I’ve got to 100 days before urges will come be strongÂ
Hi Chris 🙂 Thank you for responding - You've got this! It's a big moment when we wake up and recognise the problem (I was in such denial), but to think, we had a life before gambling existed in it and we do after too! Â
It sounds like you have been through a hard time but well done on your 2 weeks gamble free
have you got blocks in place to prevent relapse ? Great to hear you are on a plan with stepchange i am too and its great to watch the debts go down the longer you are gamble free Â
Loulou x
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Dear LOwen,
Well done, you have really made some headway. You have shared your story of the difficult times in your life and now you can continue to share your recovery story . We are pleased for you and we are here on the helpline and Livechat 24/7 if you need any one to one support and help from an adviser.Â
Best Wishes
FionaÂ
Forum Admin
Really well done Lucy. I hope you can continue beating this demon. X
Hi Lucy
keep going and beat those demons, I’m a problem gambler / gambling addict and that is something I will always consider myself, but I’m now 10 months gamble free and happy, focused with my job, family, hobbies and my finances are in a strong position.
stay positive and don’t relapse! I would advise putting every measure in place to prevent you from gambling.
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