Adam poker 2015-2022-the future

Hi again Dave cheers for popping by.....  Yes this is the time to do things with our lives....

Back to work today..... I've been asked to work on reception this weekend..   8-6 each day so two ten hour shifts... .said yes as I'm pretty well rested at the mo...... It will 1.2 20% extra pay as it's a weekend so I should get 220 pounds for it..... Cracking should make for an awesome paycheque next month.....

She said what would you like to do as she would come in for the rest of it .... I said I'll do it all lol.

If I can keep getting the extra hours at weekends really would help....

Think I'm on day 916 so 84 days till I hit the 1000 mark.

I'm off that Monday on a holiday day so I'll make sure to celebrate in style.

My manager has been off sick for another week last week and today...  A headache...    Other porter had covid and managers manager was on holiday so Joel was in on his own for the week...he did survive it tho so it's all good.

What am I looking forward to now? I spent Soo long looking forward to my move into flat week and celebrating each of day of that I kind of haven't got anything else planned...   

With this in mind I'll try and get it some overtime and earn as much as I can to save up a bit for rainy days...  

All the best Adam xxx

England draw phew ..... Great result away with Germany......praise the Lord for harry Kane.....

I'm back after a busy weekend...  Worked 21 hours over Saturday and Sunday at 1.5 overtime so should get paid for 31 hours when I get the paycheque at end of month...... Looking forward to that....

Was a busy weekend in and they said they will look out for me for other weekends that come up 

All good here ....  Been staying at my folks for a week now. I have option to stay at flat if I want but been happy to stay here a bit too.

All the best Adam xxx

Been a very busy month Soo far and previous month was busy too..... With this in mind I'm pretty run down.... Today was my 11th day in a row at work and it's been hot and busy with colleagues off..... It's only going to get busier at work as other porter has covid and my manager is off for three weeks from today sigh.....

With this in mind I was going to have a bbq at flat Saturday but I've now decided I've had enough of the heat so will try to stay cool inside over the weekend..... Have a lye in.....and rest up.

Just one more day to go tomo then the well deserved weekend.

Really need a rest as been getting pretty down last couple of days and a break from work will give me that .

All the best Adam xxx

I've made it!!!!! I've made it to the weekend....  Horray...... Time to chill

Your an amazing person adam..so glad I know you even if it is virtual. You have great strength and truly are a kind man. X

Thank you for popping by Dave and stace xxxx

Stace we have been thru Soo much and are still here I hope you continue to visit the site so we can continue this journey together xxxx

All the best Adam xxx

Catching up on my sleep today

Fully rested now and feeling a lot better.

My actions at work of putting forward things for the weekly bulletin have worked as I'm now doing the weekly bulletin.  I'm interviewing colleagues for it, putting together interesting topics.  I'd like to bring together the staff, de stress them and improve their time off.....

I've been watching a documentary on social media and it's fair to say it's a menace and is lowering people's mental health....  It's been designed to shape human users future..... The only industries where the products customers are named users are drugs and technology.  The advertisers pay for this change in behaviour..... It has really shaped the youth of today some say in a very bad way (mostly ex employees of these tech firms who have designed it to take up as much of the users time as they can, reducing time away from computers in oder to relax)..... If u are using a product for free? You are the product......  It's shaped elections..... And changed people's lives..... In the old days when you design and create a tool like a bicycle for example when not used it would lye dormant..... Social media acts in order to get used again thru notifications and is therefore extremely addictive...... These tech companies have become the most profitable companies ever in human kind.  I have not used social media for a couple of years as no matter how many times I deleted gambling adverts saying they are a sensitive topic they would still come up..... As someone who used to be very addicted to gambling having gambling come up at a click of a button and be Soo accessible is a somewhat scary thing..... Now since I'm not on Facebook I see less of these adverts and gambling is less accessible..... This is a prime example that the social media company cares more about the profit margin of an advert advertised to me as a user than the health and care of me as this customer.

There's a documentary I've watched a few times on social media it's called ...... On Netflix.

I'm going to put this in bulletin I think to help staff think more about their and their families social media usage. 

Not written much on here lately as been tired but now I'm recharged I thought I'd update on my progress.

Independence is my current goal...... Well my goal for this year.  Been buying lots for flat..... Curtains..... Slippers..... Sun chair ......etc ..... There's Soo much still to get...... Also got a tv for bedroom ...,.. might bring that back to parent forin bedroom.....

Going to stay overnight tomo at flat and go straight to work from it in morning...  Then if goes well look to stay there all the time gaining full independence.

Moving into flat has knocked saving but with some overtime, tight budgeting, looking at my usage at flat, I should be able to save more again.

All the best Adam xxx

Back at my flat tonight.... ready for work tomo..... fresh as a daisy...... rested a lot this weekend.... much much needed.... im sat now listening to music and resting up before an early start for work tomo....

Wish i could post pictures of my flat up as im super proud of what ive managed to accomplish not only over the six months from december completely renovating the flat and garden into what it is today but the seven years on here since 2015 getting better and better at not gambling in order to save money to own the flat outright.

I still owe money on it but am looking to pay it back over the next ten years (will be a tough ask), but im willing to put in some hard graft at work and will say yes to any overtime i can get in order to pay it back.

Then when i hit 50 hopefully my flat will be paid for and i can focus on saving for retirement after what i plan to be six months sebatical at work to chill in garden over a summer and watch the football.

That's my plan for the next ten years.....

All the best Adam xxx

The rest and relaxation  is so important, 

You should be super proud of where you are at , both not gambling and life in general.

testing, frustrating, crazy, not thinking straight, emotions all over the place, impulsiveness creeping in, thoughts of playing poker again have all stemed from signing up to facebook again two days ago.

Signed up to facebook just to look up someone for work just needed to know the spelling of their surname.  but once i had found it left my account open.

Then today after work got back and thought id go on started to look up friends and friend requests etc.... then i thought of the sunday billion free poker tourney i played years ago and thought id like to play that again....

So i looked it up and now u need to be an 8*8 member to play.... so then i crazily thought why not join as my gamstop is over can just play the free tournies (when calso infact my  mind became wired and i was thinking if i can join again i can play poker for money again? horray that would be great? of course totally forgeting all the years and misery it brought, the stress etc that at that moment went completely out the window,....

So i looked up my gamstop and tried to get it cancelled..... luckily it runs untill july 2023 so one more year...

So youd think that was the end of it,,,,, byut then i thought i live at new address i can use other email and sign up to a poker site with that..... the madness continued..... i had a moment of about to click on the deposit.... then tried to get verified and luckily my mobile number didnt get accepted as i think the reason is its on gamstop or related....

So now after a bath, speaking to my mum, and six hours of feeling uptight and agitated with the what ifs, should i shouldnt i's, i have come out unscathed....

But however the main thing was that if i was over the five year mark........on gamstop.....then i would have no doubt signed up and started playing i was soo gonna do it.....

925 days would be down the drain...... for what would no doubt have been a couple of weeks or a month of late nights and early mornings sitting at a computer eating unhealthily and ultimately stressing myself out....

Note to self today is a major wake up call.....

So no damage down but if it wasnt for my blocks id be back at it

 note to self massive day count doesnt stand a chance against my will sometimes to start playing again.

All the best adam xx

Dear @adam123,

Thank you for sharing, it is important to understand that no matter where in your recovery you are these things happen, but having your barriers in place and support around you allowed you delay yourself gambling which ultimately stopped you from gambling. 

If you need any further support please give us a call. 

Thanks, 

Ben

Forum Admin

Hi Ben,

The problem is if i could have gambled, i would of!!!!

I have the blocks in place but come next year there will be that opportunity again

If i act impulsively then i know i will gamble.

Need to put in plans of actions...

Five years not gambling online is huge

Already been four years i guess

My finances are soo much better....

This month my outgoings on bills are over 900 pounds...... due to 160 on annual tv licence..... so had i started gambling again who knows how much id have spent..... i only earn 1000 a month...

This month i should earn 1200 as ive doen overtime which is great as i can afford treats and save a bit for the winter months when heating the flat will be expensive.

The only thing that really matters at the moment at this time, this year, is that i wasnt able to gamble and im now in a better mindset.....  Next year is a different matter.

Looking to save 4k this calender year towards my debt, ive worked out in need to earn 900 pounds overtime from now till december and spend just 200 a month on food and socialising altogether....

Not sure whether its possible will see once im used to my new spending habbits..... Soo far i have no idea how much my food budget needs to be? will be buying savvy and only buying things on offer but will see how  much it costs.

All the best Adam xx