Attempt to stop gambling and get out of debt.

student101, it sounds like you have a good plan for the way forward and to live a debt free life. You certainly don't come across badly, so no worries there. The good news is you have your whole working life ahead of you and any damage done can be reversed. You've just given yourself a little bit of an uphill task at the start, but your prospects are good if you're able to stay gamble free.

All the best and I look forward to seeing your diary become a success story!

IHi, I won’t go too much into my own story but will say that the amount of debt you’ve got for the amount you earn is manageable. Do not convince yourself you can gamble your way out of it, you won’t. I wish I stopped when I had the same amount as you but I didn’t and it just kept on growing and growing. Best of luck in stopping. I can tell you from my own experience that stopping is the best thing you’ll ever do.

Thank you both for your comments and best of luck with your journeys.

My main thing is getting a bit of momentum going. You hate the thought of having to deal with it over the next year which feels ages away, so as you said-you attempt to bet your way out of it. Then all of a sudden its 9 months later and instead of having the problem nearly sorted your in a worse place than where you started.

Probably an "in denial" view, refusing to accept its time to deal with circumstances.

I stopped for about 9 months two years ago and it was great, back then I worked part time and was only left with £300/£400 a month. I wasnt in control of my account and realised that other than gambling I had very little expenses. Even the wildest night out cant add up to the equivelant of £100 spins on the fobt.

Day 2 complete.

Decided I am also going to post every expense each day to keep track of what I am spending on other than gambling. Also, ask myself what steps I am going to take the day after in order to spend less. This blog is basically just to talk to myself lol

£13 spent on food for me and girlfriend today which is cheaper than the takeout we were thinking about so not fussed. We are both trying to get fit at the moment which is a good excuse to save money also.

Will take lunch tomorrow to work to save money, will also not purchase any extras whilst at petrol station.

When I get to 14 day milestones I am going to treat myself to bottles of single malt to add to my whiskey collection. The hope is, I will see this grow and be motivated. When I was gambling I would grudge or avoid paying £70+ for a bottle I really wanted yet would have no problem blowing a couple hundred on the machine-MADNESS. However, as I am trying to save money I will look for bottles on deal for about £30 as there are plenty.

I read alot of self development books as a hobby. Very few I have not read and one thing I find with them all is that what really matters in achieving any goals is taking consistent actions. Another, is listing the good things in life and putting our problems in context.

A technique I picked up from one of them and used when I was struggling to get a grad job was to ask myself every night- what did I do today to get a job? I became obsessed with having at least three answers to that question. I would apply for so many or do small things such as watch interview techniques on youtube. It worked great for me. It stopped my from burying my head in the sand.

I am going to ask myself everynight starting tomorrow- What did I do today to prevent gambling and improve my financial position?

I am also going to list one thing I am grateful for. Tonight I am grateful for my health. I attended the funeral of someone my age last year which was extremely sad. It puts into perspective our own problems.

Gambling is an emotional issue, the financial consequences occur because using - gambling - always results in a net outflow of money, hence overspending and debt.

It’s easy enough to focus on the money and debt but that’s just avoiding the real issue: What does the act of placing a bet give to you and why do you need it?

You can number crunch as much as you like by yourself but overcoming addiction means getting help, via GA and GamCare. You’re not alone.

In the meantime, have you signed up for GamStop?

CW

Hi CW,

Thank you for your comments. From the start the gambling really built up from working in a bookmakers, as someone who already gambled, having to sit and listen to odds and opportunities for sometimes 13 hour shifts it is hard to not find what you think are good bets. Eventually I used it as an escape when struggling in uni, go on the machine turn into a zombie for a couple of hours and have my only concern be what the next number on the wheel would be.

Now however, my trigger is the debt. For the past 5/6 months I would go 29 days with having a few hundred in my account and not gamble. However when payday would come and I would work out my debts I would always convince myself instead of paying 900 towards the debt, I should use 100/200 and try and win some back. I would then go on to lose most of it. I have always then been able to abstain from using the following couple of hundred I have left.

The scariest thing with my gambling at the moment is I can not stop when I start. Winning £1000 does not give me a buzz, whenever I do I feel that I have to risk it all to get to £10000. I can not remember the last time I kept any winnings.

I have put stops in place. I am signed up for gamstop. I no longer have my bank card and I only carry a credit card which can only be used for purchases ( does not allow me to lift money or use on gambling sites).

The reasons I am focusing on my debt is that 1. For a long time it has been the reason I have gambled. 2. I am bad with money even outside of gambling. I spend far too much when I am out every week.

Numbers numbers numbers. Don’t kid yourself that your debt is why you gamble.

Its always an emotional issue. We just attach ‘rationalisations’ so that we can avoid the real problems.

Btw addressing your **** is liberating

Sounds like you’re in the same spot I was in. I’d literally hate spending money on anything, constantly looking for the cheapest options but wouldn’t have a second thought of putting a couple of hundred in my betting account. I think that’s one of the most statisfying things when you go out and by something useful for yourself and don’t have those thoughts anymore.

The winning for me was the same also. I’ve been up thousands and thousands in one session and gone on to lose it all. Some people say this is out of greed but I genuinely done believe it is. I’m not a greedy person and I’ve always been very unmaterialistic. My thoughts are that this is all part of the compulsion. You can’t control it because in that moment you’re not there. It’s almost a trance like state. This is what fascinates me most about it really. To make people put their lives on the line, I think there is a lot about the compulsive side of gambling we don’t know about.

My advice is that once you stop for a good amount of time all these things become clear to you. I suppose the challenge is not getting sucked back into it again.

It’s a stupid past time and the best way you can get one up on the bookies is stopping entirely. Keep us updated.

I am not saying it is why I gamble, I am saying it has been a trigger. Self loathing over the money wasted.

I have put stops in place. I find focusing on the debt and numbers every single day gives me a physical positive thing I can do each day to improve my situation and keeps my mind focused on not gamling.

I didnt realise I had to conform to a certain method to post on this site.....

garvonmon. Thank for your comments.

yeah thats why im wanting to buy a reward every 14 days. To see the value of money again.

Chasing losses is universal amongst gamblers, it’s one of the signs that the compulsion is getting or has long since got out of control. But gambling really isn’t a financial issue. It’s about the compulsion to place the bet, about what feeding the compulsion gives you, about why you need to feed it knowing how damaging it is. Why do you feel and feed it?

The self loathing that you mention is also an emotional factor. Painful to look at but unavoidable if you’re serious about becoming a person who doesn’t need to use.

Move away from the numbers and the chance is there to start living again.

CW

Thank you for your comments, everyone is entitled to their view on the best ways for recovery however I feel fully commited and happy with trying to recover my financial position side by side with the recovery.

I know why I gamble, I have thought about it many times when stopping before. I stopped for 10 months one time and fell back into it as I took control of my account back too early. Then when drunk on a stag do I got involved in a group bet with friends which got me back started. This time better stops are in place aswell as friends knowing not to involve me.

I am someone who always focusses on numbers regardless of whatever project/goal it is. I like to use spreadsheet and be extremely organised. I even use them when making gym/diet plans. Maybe this is why I feel compelled to use a method which has worked for me with everything else, something I use daily in work.

I am not thinking the problem is just the debt, that once I get out of debt then all of a sudden I am no longer a gambler. Far from it and I hope that is not how my original post sounds. I am focussing on finances daily for a number of reasons.

1. It gives me something to stay focussed on my goal each day. As I have said I dont gamble every day, I go weeks with money in my account and have no compulsion. The problem is by the time it gets to payday and I have extra cash I have forgotten the pain of the last loss and I convince myself to give it a go again. By focussing on my spend each day and feeling the realness of the debt each day this will help me stay present.

2. Like many of you, I have forgotton the value of money. By doing this I allow myself to learn it again. Nitpicking over £2 here and £10 there will help teach me the value.

3. It allowed me to finally face up to the mess I have gotten into.

I dont understand why there is an issue with me focussing on the finances each days. Abstaining does not feel like much to me, I am not sitting here resisting an urge to bet, especially with the stops now in place. I don't mean to offend others who are struggling to fight the temptation, I have been there in the past and it was extremely hard.

If I posted that in order to help me with my recovery I had decided to throw myself into sport each day then I am sure people would be supporting it. I am foccussing my attention on something just as productive, attempting to recover my financial position.

Hopefully, I will still be sticking with this method and posting that I am a year gambling free and out of debt. Time will tell.

Day 3 complete. Spent money only on fuel. No additional spending so happy with the day. No thoughts of gambling other than dicussing it on this.

Feeling extremely motivated today. Early days but happy to be making positive steps. Also, made a couple of decisions I have been lingering on today, feels good to know what I need to do now.

What did I do today to prevent gambling and improve my financial position? I did not gamble, I cleared screenshots of bets off my phone, I posted on this forum and I stuck to my budget.

What am I grateful for today? The weather. Extremely sunny day always makes life look a little bit more positve.

Nice little anecdote in the audiobook today about achieving goals. When driving on the motorway in the dark you don't need to see the whole journey, all you need is the headlights lighting up the next few metres and the directions to get there.

Focus on the small steps, beat the day, hour or even the next 5 minutes if thats where you are. Don't worry about seeing the end goal.

I am setting a small goal of posting on this for 7 days straight.