Back to MY Future

64 days since my last bet.

Not been on here as much recently but just read a story that bought back a thousand thoughts.

It really helped and was exactly what i needed. It just shows how much it helps writing your thpughts down, not just yourself but other people too. I wish everyone the best at giving up it really is such a waste of time.........

Hi Biff,

Thankyou for your comments and encouragement. I hope my story hasn't depressed you too much... I can see that there are quite a few parallels between our stories.

I'm over the moon that you have done so well, and that using your pain and the pain you have caused to your wife has motivated you so well. I hope that I can do the same... and I really mean it this time. No more broken promises. And although I am still in very early days I am starting to feel hopeful.

Your story has really helped me. I've read alot of stories on here that are stories of failure, and you begin to think that all is hopeless and that it can never be done... but you have just restored my faith when it was waining a little.

Truelly thankyou, and long may your success continue.

SF

Its been well over a week since I posted, im gonna try and post more regularly again as i didnt realise before but do now its not just me that my diary is helping but the odd person that may read it too, im not calling people that read my diary odd!!

Just finished on Day 72. 28 days away from my next target other than day 73. Ive had another counselling session since my last post, I didnt have much to say as Ive had no urges to gamble. From the last session I had to think of ways to occupy my free time. It came to me by chance really but ive decided to try and relearn spanish. I bought a set of cds from ******* so i can listen to on the way to work and also work on at home when i have nothing to do.

Now the weather is nicer and daylight longer its easier too, why would i want to spend time in a bookies or at home gambling online when its so nice outside at the moment??

Ok well i hope to write again in a few days, i wish every1 the best of luck and keep strong

It's ok Biff, you can call me odd...

I'm completely with you. Although my diary is mostly just for me to write down what I am thinking and feeling at any given time... which to be honest is mostly very depressing... if it can help just one other person to quit this habit, or even to just seek help then that is a massive bonus that i dont think i could put a value on. All I know is that it is better than winning any jackpot. I wouldn't want anyone else to go through what I and so many others have been through if i can in some way help them.

Anyway, keep up the good work,

SF

Well what a great weekend! I can honestly say i didn't think of gambling once not that i had been thinking about it too much beforehand but it never crossed my mind to think about any odds.

Another small milestone tomorrow, 80 days. i asked my wife a few days ago if she trusts me yet, she said i think so yes, that's certainly better than i don't know if i can ever trust you ever again, that was about 65 days ago.

My life has improved so much in this time its unreal. It just makes you think when you're gambling your not just risking money you are risking your whole life, how is that possibly worth the risk? Its taken a hell of a long time for me to realise this but now i finally do and its never going to affect me again. I've been lucky and managed thru the skin of my teeth not to lose everything that's important to me. lesson learnt. I wish everyone well in the next few days.

Keep strong, don't give in.

86 days today. 2 weeks until the big 100.

Have seen a substantial amount of money dissappear to pay off my debts, this will be happening for the next year or so, will have to get used to the horrible feelings of ...what a waste, why etc....

NO thoughts of gambling at all I def think the compulsive side has gone I just hope it never comes back , staying away is the only way to beat it.

Good luck for the next few days...stay strong

Biff stories like yours keep me moving in the right direction.My compulsion is dwindling day by day and i feel like i can trust myself again,i am going to talk to my daughter about this as i think she is at an age to understand,and that will also help me as all my mates and family now know i am off the betting.

Keep going as always..i will get to my 80 day target like you.Thankyou.

One week on and one week closer to 100 days. I think its a decent achievement for me. I ve been paid 3 times, there have been numerous events that I used to love betting on, The Masters, World Championship Snooker, Start of the County Cricket season, and still no bets.

100 days isnt the be all and end all and i dont for one minute think that Ive beaten this crazy compulsive gambling problem, but 100 days has been my long distance target and being just 1 week away feels good.

I think once you have hit rock bottom you have a choice to make. Gladly, with my brothers help and for the last 2 months my wifes' and with a fair bit of mental strength from myself, I am almost there. Ill have to think of my next target, I dont think anything to long distant so maybe as Ive nearly got to 100, 200 is the obvious one.

My life is back on track and only i can derail it, but im not going to. Im going to stay away from all types of gambling.....ITS NOT WORTH IT

Good luck everybody i wish you all well..stay strong

Hi Biff...

Well done for nearly getting to 100 days... that is a great acheivment.

How about 183 days for your next target??

Half a year!

Not quite so round a number as 200... but a little closer!

Anyway... keep it up...

SF

Well 99 days done 1 to go for my first big milestone....Everything going well, i hope to keep it this way

Good luck everyone

Well 100 days achieved!

Went into a bookies today for the first time in 100 days. I felt terrible in there like I was a naughty schoolboy doing something he shouldnt. I wasnt gambling though It was a local bookies that I hardly ever used to go to but one that I hadnt excluded myself from, I have now. I watched people handing over countless amounts of cash, as i was standing waiting for the form. i felt really bad for them especially as after 1 horse race and 2 dogs the cashier gave nothing back. I was just so glad those days are behind me, I never want to be that person again, handing over cash, and for what?

I wasnt tempted to gamble the £1 in my wallet to be honest i just wanted to get out of there as quick as I could. It bought back so many bad memories and it really affected me for about 5mins after.

Feel good now though, I went for along bike ride in the woods and now Im just looking fwd to the next 100 gamble free days.

All the best everyone

nice update, well done on the 100 days, great stuff

dan

Hi Biff,

Well done on hitting your first century.

That is a massive achievement and you should be gugely proud of yourself.

You don't need me to tell you to keep your guard up as complacency could easily start to set in. And you have proved that by continuing with putting exclusions in place even at this stage.

Really happy for you and your achievment mate and truely hope I can join you in the tripple figures in a cpouple of months.

Take care,

SF

Thanks for your comments Dan and SF. 100 days does feel great but Ill feel a lot better when i get to a year i think. Small steps though.

Stay strong

Well 49 days without a post, but it seems to have flown by, im not sure where the time has gone..

Anyway 1 day short of 150 now and no closer to gambling I can thankfully say. Im a million miles away from where i was 149 days ago, im so much happier and quality of my life is unrecognisable. No streess and no worries. I always want to feel this way and i owe it to my wife, where things have never been this good, and to myself.

I hope everyone else is doing well and I wish you well in the future.....heres to another 149 days, then il be nearer my 1st year since I was 17 wher ive not gambled!

Stay Strong