Day 164
The snow has gone as quick as it came. Had a morning out with my lad getting some things for his mum tomorrow. Just having a maccies feel like a proper single Dad in here.
KTF
Any single mums about , or didn't you notice ?
The darkness comes back, but hope shines through,
Focus and strength is how i will get through.
All the hard work is easily overturned, by a spin of a wheel or a turn of a card.
This is the thought that keeps me sane, i dont wont to feel that same pain again.
No matter what we win is never enough, plus it is never used for bills or pleasaurable stuff.
It is always recycled in that endless loop, untill you reach £0 and the reality hits you
Then its another month of no food and bills to be paid,
But the next month we repeat it again.
I have hopes for the future and finally some money saved,
But make no mistake alot of my life to gambling i gave.
It took from me family and friends, and came close to taking me to my end.
The scars is my mind you can not see, but the healed ones on my hands show clearley.
The only thing that has got me through is a close friend and oldhamktf to.
A my darkest points they were the voice of reason, so the thanks i know share is equal between them.
Thanks for reading this guys
Hey Martin , thanks for all your support buddy , youv'e been there from the start . Were never alone on here as it's just one big club and I've got all my clubmates to thank for where I am now , always pleased to see you just over my shoulder my friend !
Have a great evening and I'll catch up soon , KTF
Day 164
Just spent a productive half hour on lunch self excluding from around 40 bookies. Called 0800 294 2060 spoke to a lovely young lady took all my details and the postcodes of the areas I used to bet in around me home and work and she brought the bookies in that area and I agreed to be SE for 12 months at all of them. Just need to email them a copy of my passport and another recent colour photo and that's done. It can be done by post if you prefer
Very easy yes i might be able to sneak in and place a bet but I'm not planning on doing it. Another block in the wall it's getting quite high now
I can't see any reason for not doing it but if you want to gamble with your recovery good luck.
KTF
Good post there Martin.
You really are backing up your words. Keeping it simple but very effective. As they say ' keep it up '.
Strength
Cheers Paul,
It wad quite empowering. I didn't need to do it as I gave excluded from about 15 which are very close to home and work but why not add more only a free phone call a bit of time and it just affirms my commitment to have a gamble free life.
Half hour very well spent.
KTF
Great to see your brick wall continuing to grow, and very wise words, my friend why gamble with recovery indeed,
Keep winning and keep building those bricks, recovery sure is ongoing :)))
Suzanne xxx
Thanks for posting that I will follow your lead and do the same this week. No need for a haircut, im still semi fresh.
Day 165
Sorry rob27 I forget to thank you for you poetic thoughts good to see your ticking over.
Robf got a email from SE saying my photo had come out all yellow so I need to take some tips of you.
thanks for all the other comments appreciated as always.
Nothing much to report today good day in work no urges just about to leave for GA set myself a new goal of not to miss a meeting for a full 12 months not missed on yet 23 on the bounce tonight. Just had a text of one of my GA guys saying he won't be there tonight, some people just don't get it no commitment........ Gave some excuse of his girlfriend going into labour earlier today some people eh. (Only joking she is in labour)
KTF
Day 165
Sorry rob27 I forget to thank you for you poetic thoughts good to see your ticking over.
Robf got a email from SE saying my photo had come out all yellow so I need to take some tips of you.
thanks for all the other comments appreciated as always.
Nothing much to report today good day in work no urges just about to leave for GA set myself a new goal of not to miss a meeting for a full 12 months not missed one yet 23 on the bounce tonight.
Just had a text of one of my GA guys saying he won't be there tonight, some people just don't get it no commitment........ Gave some excuse of his girlfriend going into labour earlier today some people eh. (Only joking she is in labour)
KTF
Sounds like a typical selfish girlfriend to me..... also joking..
How do I tap into your commitment? Good on you
Another good meeting tonight heard a therapy of one member which was very inspiring ending with 8 years of gamble free recovery.
Up at six in the morning but won't be able to get to sleep for a while yet always feel high for want of a better word.
Off to catch up on some boxset and relax.
Get to bed pal! Sleep is precious. Well done on keeping dedicated to this task. Love your positive posts.
Day 168
Good day had today. Steady day in work bang on target pulled it out of the bag late on wasn't looking good with an hour to go but never gave up and got six in one.
Got a text on my way home from my mate from GA who was proud as punch with his new baby who arrived today, he could of made the meeting last night after all.
Never thought when i went to GA ot joined this forum that I would meet people I now consider to be good friends.
Just checked my email today something I never used to like doing, used to be someone telling me a payday loan was due which just meant I had to get they money out of the account for gambling tokens before they got their hands on it. Today I had a email confirming my self exclusion had gone though so that's a total of 48 bookies im excluded from now. I'm sure that will soon be 50 the way these places keep opening up.
KTF
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