DAY 1 - minute 1

Thanks guys for your continued support and kind words. I just came back from a long walk with my 1 year old and I can honestly say I really enjoyed it. Not something I would have done before because I would either have my head stuck in the computer or be down at the local bingo hall(not playing bingo I might add- but slots). I am so grateful that I have given myself this second chance at life without gambling while my kids are still so small because I can now enjoy every minute and know that they will never remember mum gambling all the time! Thanks for everyone on this site for keeping me strong and I will not you guys down!

Linda xx

Day 45 today and I can't believe how the days are racking up! I feel very proud of myself at the moment which is a great feeling. I am so looking forward to going out for a meal and a few wines tonight as I've been on my diet for 2 weeks and been super strict so it will be nice to have night off. Will have to go for a long jog tomorrow to make up for it though! Lol

I've lost 8 lbs since I started and need to lose 22 more before April 10th which is my goal.

Such an irony that I've changed from losing one type of pounds to another!

Keeping strong xxx

Linda

checking in with a massive hangover! day 46 clean x Linda

Hi Linda

I can vouch that massive hangovers still do not come close to that "rock bottom" feeling of desperation that gambling can bring. Feed yourself up with junk food, water and time and you will be fine in no time!!

Take care and enjoy the rest of your weekend.

Feb.

thanks FEB! yes I am doing exactly that eating small amounts of junk (week 2 of my diet so dont want to go overboard!) and drinking a lot of water. Kids driving me up the wall but you are right nothing compares to that gut wrenching despair that I was feeling a few weeks ago! I hope all is going well for you too x

Linda

Heehee! Hope the hangover wasn't from lady petrol??

hey louise

it was a mixture of everything- feeling much better now though even though the half hour on cross trainer just about killed me this morning! lol

xlinda

Hey Linda,

Lol...great to see you do everything in ur power to get that hangover out of the way :-))

Exercise is a good way to get the toxins out of ur system.

Stay strong, happy, calm...and sober of course lol

Keep it up, u doing fab!!!

Day at a time

S x

thanks sandra I really appreciate you and everyone else who posts on my diary.

x linda

so day 47 for me! skint at the moment coz another few days till payday but am quite happy just getting by and still managing to save a small amount each week which is great. Have had no urges to gamble they seem to be getting less and less. I do however talk about my addiction every day sometimes with my dad and other times with my other half or my best friends in fact I talk to anyone who wants to listen. I think the fact that I have made it so public has helped me because I cant ever go back. To be honest I genuinely believe that having gambled and admitting my problem and stopping has made me a better person. I am way more patient, more fun, healthier and I even look better- if I do say so myself lol!

No urge could ever ever be strong enough for me to give this up!

Keeping strong

Hardtimes (will change my name to goodtimes when I make it to dec 31 2014)

Hi HT

I'm sure you are heading in the right direction and speaking about your addiction is good for you. Maybe try speaking about recovery as well as it turns the whole episode upside down and hopefully move you forward in recovery. Recovery is a wonderful gift that reveals itself more and more as the time goes by. There is no end to recovery it just gets better and better as we go. Sometimes we hit bad times but getting through makes us stronger.

Take care

Hi Smiler

thanks so much for your post- yes I should have said, i talk about my recovery more than my past mistakes. they are gone and I try not to dwell on it too much. i talk about how I am overcoming my addiction and how it feels to be free from it. I also talk about the dangers of this addiction in society where it is being forced down our kids throats every day through daytime advertisments, football sponsors and tv shows. I am a true believer in we make our own choices but I do worry with all this glamorization of the gambling industry our kids will have a harder time in the future. All I can do is make sure my kids know the dangers and I will happily share my story with them when the time comes.

This site has been a real rock for me over the last few weeks as I get to rant and to give back by just being there as an ear for anyone who needs one.

I hope you are doing well and keeping strong and thanks again for your post xxx Linda

nothing to report apart from feeling exhausted (little one has ear infection again)- day 48 x

Hey Linda,

Just a quick one. Just wanted you to know that you're amazeballs. So there!!

2 more sleeps to 50 days - can you believe where we are after all the early days? I've just read the first few days and weeks of your diary - ferries and colds and hardships........still not easy.........but 7 weeks tomorrow and a celebration the day after!!

Proud to be part of your recovery but even happier that you're part of mine.

Mr Brightside

Thanks mr b

These feelings of being proud of oneself are really quite foreign to us cgs but the feeling is great! I can only imagine how good it will feel to make 100 or the year but with one day at a time we will get there, that is a fact!

Clean for 14 x

Linda