Deep breath and start again

Your doing amazing Annie! I'm so glad your feeling so positive, it's great ! Xx

Well done some great posts here. Good luck with the op and enjoy a few days rest after.

KTF

Day 14!! Feeling better after op - although been a bit groggy for a couple of days. I have spent quite a bit of time in bed over the past few days and 16 days ago this would have been an opportunity to lie all day and gamble. But not now.

I have been proactive today; I had a letter from one credit card company advising I was over my credit limit. Now normally I would just ignore it and hope for the best but today I stood tall and spoke with a gentleman and advised him I had a gambling problem which has led me to accruing these debts. He has cancelled my next direct debit to give me time to arrange my debt plan. He was really helpful and advised that they have a department who deal with finacial problems. He really made my day.

Best wishes to all xxx

Hiya annie , glad your feeling a little better , well done you on facing things head on, as you get a better sense of relief when things are out there and being delt with !.

I'm recovering well from my op too , just had my gamblestone removed ! it did the trick !! LOL .

Take care annie !

Alan x

Alan that has to the worst joke yet.

Sorry Annie pressed post before my bit to you. Glad your feeling a bit better and 16 days gamble free. As for the debt speaking with them if your honest they will try to help and while they must take some responsibility for irresponsible lending we signed on the dotted line so to speak. I have worried so many times about speaking to them and the felt so much better when I have spoke to them

KTF

Thanks for your comments, Dean, KTF and Alan. Day 16, just had 2nd counselling session and feeling positive. Also addressing my debts with Step Change; I have compiled a spreadsheet with incomings, outgoings and outstadning amounts owed to credit cards and loans and it is reading not for the faint hearted. I've got myself into a blinking mess but hopefully being gamble free and hard working will get these debts paid off before my daughter goes to Uni.

My daughter is a lovely wee girl, she is kind and thoughtful and very bright (unlike her daft Mum). She knows something is going on and I have been in two minds whether to tell her. But, I'll wait until she's a bit older as I wouldn't want her to worry.

LOL Alan - I've heard that's a tricky one to remove - just watch how you're sitting!

Take care friends and best wishes to all in their recovery xx

Hi Annie , it's never good reading when we add all those figures together. The important thing is that you have faced it full on so well done you . Try not to put to much pressure on yourself by trying to pay everything back too quickly , you still have to live and enjoy life ! As for your daughter , you'll know when the times fight and I'm sure when you do she'll understand what you've achieved to make things better and be very proud of her lovely mum ! Take care Annie and stay safe x

Hi Annie, first of all you are doing just fine, listen do not panic about your debts, they are on a plan,so they are not your priority, now, if this helps, my debts are ongoing, and a big reminder and tool for me, they are scars but positive scars because I am in control of my debt (if that makes sense) I in a strange way feel good about my debt because I know it is going down on my terms, and I have not accrued any more, I don't let my debt rule my life, (by my wages) that is one way I am kind to myself,

Keep moving OAUs stuff will fall into place.without you realising at that time.

Suzanne xxx

Thanks Suzanne, really encouraging words. The past few years have seen me climbing the mountain of debt and checking my internet banking daily to see if my bills are covered and then spending the remainder on gambling; over the past couple of weeks I've been checking it and feeling good that there is money in my account. I will try not to panic about the debts as I have a plan and it will be much easier finacially and emotionally in the long run.

So, day 16 has been and nearly gone, bring on the next 16 days - I'm raring to go!!

Take care buddies xx

Hi diary, been very busy with ill daughter so no time to post. Day 19 and things are looking up. I have arranged a debt payment plan which will last for 3 years and I so grateful to StepChange for their invaluable support and care. So delighted my debt will be cleared in 3 years, I thought it would have lasted about 10 years!

Cheers Dean xx

Yes. 20 days and in a different place than my last attempt at recovery; this is the real thing. I am talking openly and honestly with my husband and it's quite amazing how, in such a short time, I no longer have any urges to go to the lonely world of online slots. My husband is a sweetheart and if you have read my diary you will see that we have been here once before; I told him I had amassed a large amouont of debt through this evil compulsion and he happily took out a loan to cover the debt (didn't even go to the bank with me) and really never mentioned it again. As a result it did not take me long to start gambling again and I take full responsibility for that. So, this time I have made a point of talking to my husband about my gambling regularly and he has been a massive support. I am a very lucky lady indeed.

Best wishes to all in their recovery and, if you are just starting your journey please tell your partner and surround yourself with as much support as you can. xxxxxxxx

Day 22. Having a quiet day today. Had a couple of injections in my foot yesterday and not to walk, stand etc. Not sure if that will go to planas hubby has man flu and dog was spayed last week and is getting narky with 'the cone of shame'! All in all we are the fit family. Too much going on to think of gambling; and can honestly say it has not crossed my mind to go near an online slot in the past 22 daysand quite chuffed at that.

Take care all and best wishes in your recovery xx

Day 23 and floored with hubbys man flu! I will struggle on with the lurgy and still go to work whereas he has taken the week off sick! Mind you it does seems like a good idea 🙂

I am nearly the same amount of days to when I last relapsed but as I have said loads of times, it is completely different; I am completely different. My counsellor will call again on Tuesday and the plan is to try fortnightly sessions as I am dealing with my emotions, finances, relationships head on - honesty is definitely the best policy (a thing that so many of us lack when sucked into a life of addiction - but we can overcome!)

Best wishes to all and a big thanks to Dean for being there for me and so many others, you are a star xx

Yay, 25 days gamble free, go me! Still feeling rotten with the lurgy and even took this afternoon off work, which did not go down well with the bosses. Hopefully I should hear whether I am getting a new job soon as it's difficult dealing with life, being in recovery and work for a shower of ar$eholes!!

Best wishes to all in their recovery xx