fresh start

Nothing wrong with the site Boro it's just that you won't stop doing what youv'e alway's done for the last 7 yrs on here ?.

If you were totally serious that you wanted to give up gambling then you'd do whatever it took to achieve it , if you can't give up going in the bookies then give up having money around to fund it , everything's possible if you want it enough .

I wish you well mate whatever you decide but you can't expect anything to change without you changing first and that ain't gonna happen all the time you keep doing the same thing ?

All the best .

Boro,

Just read your earlier post. As someone who gambled as recently as 12 days ago I can sympathise with you and know how badly you will be feeling.

As a long term member of the forum you know what happens next. You have the necessary experience and knowledge to know that for a week or so you are going to feel awful, angry, sad, disappointed etc. What you do during this period will be crucial for you. If you gamble and lose you will gamble and lose again and one problem grows and grows into something catastrophic. Today wasn’t catastrophic. It is a massive setback which you can recover from. You may think that you could gamble and win and all will be fine again. Again, experience and knowledge shows us that that would only mask this situation and eventually we lose and lose again making all things worse.

So, that only leaves one workable solution. Suffer for the next week or so. Don’t gamble during this time. Ride the emotional out, get on here everyday and post your true and honest feelings. Nobody said this journey would be easy. It’s not easy but if we can put days, months and years together there is a chance of a truly great life.

Tomso

Thanks for your comments a9 and tomso you are both right in what you said

Another £200 down fobt are slowly killing me like.I just don’t seem to be able to stop playing them no matter what I do or lose on them. I just hope and pray that I get to April with the money I have and don’t play on them again. Totall madness today lost about £700 since Friday. I have used Apple Pay to gamble because I ain’t got a card and I begged me mam to lend me the other money I lost. Yep I put pressure on a 69 year old woman to lend me the money.

Oh mate, I feel for you.

Like I said before, please don't see April as the time when you will feel totally safe from this madness. Yes, the reduction in April is a good start but it's nowhere near to where we need the gambling industry to be with regards to controls. They are all businesses and they will be having lots of meetings and plans for their long-terms with not a single amount of empathy for people like you and me.

Time to remove Apple Pay, me thinks.

Stay strong.

NT

Hey Graeme

I guess when you come on here and post that you've gambled, it doesn't mean that the slate is now clean of that gambling escapade... It just means that you've come on here and posted and still have a gambling problem. Like us all on here. The problem isn't going away any time soon.

Your life doesn't have to be dictated by your gambling problem, if you want you can dictate your life in spite of your gambling problem.

Step 1: acceptance you have a gambling problem!

A problem of this nature (in its infancy) means you are lost and unable to see the wood from the trees, so from there go and invest in the wisdom and knowledge of those who see the trees clearly, you'll find them in GA rooms, therapy sessions, here on Gamcare, GP, church, mosque, synagogue wherever... But the point is there are people out there who can and will help you through this as they know and feel your pain.

It's mega tough trying to fight this alone. Your investing all your hopes in a month of a calendar year when really you need to invest all your hopes in you and your self-belief. And if you don't have any right now, try a different approach to recovery, one that nurtures this self-belief.

Stay strong friend and don't give up hope.

I don’t have any self belief. April will be the end of it for me. It’s the only way I stop is when they are reduced to £2. I can remember the councillor saying when you are on the fobt imagine your daughter on the screen what would she be telling you to do. That was the best advice I got and it worked for a while. No gambling today been at work all day

No gambling today

Boro,

Well done buddy for getting through the day without gambling. You’ve had a tough time recently but your back on it now. So be pleased with yourself tonight. Tomorrow will be better because of today.

Happy news to sign out on for the night.

Tomso

Cheers tomso. Well gone and bought myself a newer car so feeling quite happy and positive

Well got me new car a couple of days ago. I needed me card to get it so I ordered a new one. But with having me card I have been gambling heavily it came to a head today when I lost about £1500 most of it was winnings. Just stupidy going a £100 a spin in a world of me own at one point I was up.

But only got Myself to blame. The thing is I don’t think I ever stop gambling but can’t go on them machines. But how many times have I said this

Sorry to hear about this mate. If you can try to get through march without gambling then your beloved April will arrive and we'll see what happens then.

Do you think the ruling will definitely be enforced come April? No extensions or anything? No loopholes? I'm dubious... :o(

Anyway, could be a brighter year for you if like you say, the £2 stake will finally put an end to your gambling nightmare. You could actually start living your life again without the rollercoaster come April :o)

The other thing I wanted to mention is that I've noticed whenever you lose money you're always quick to mention that 'it was winnings' or 'i was up anyway'... I almost feel like by saying this each time you convince yourself that it's ok that you have lost or it's not that bad actually?

I think this is dangerous thinking. You just let go of £1500 Graeme. In one go. And you have nothing to show for it. I'm sorry to say but winnings or no winnings that ain't right fella. You know it's not right. That's a months wages for the average person. Those machines are supposed to be there for people's 'enjoyment and entertainment'. Of course we all know that's b******t - they are actually there to prey on people like you and me... Those for who the FOBT has long ceased to be entertaining or enjoyable anymore... Those who use it only as a means to get our fix.

Stop being the prey Graeme! £1500 is a mental amount of money to flush down the toilet! Please stop justifying it or trying to make yourself feel better by quoting your losses as winnings... I think one of the most destructive gambling mechanisms in your habit is your ability to make yourself feel better with this delusion about losing winnings.

The truth is that money was yours (albeit on the screen) and you blitzed the lot because you are too proud to lose. And too proud to seek out the help you need right now. Man... I didnt watch you lose the money but I know EXACTLY what went through your head when you lost that money as I used to do the same!

Anyway Graeme please, stop referring to these huge sums of money you are losing as winnings, only because it's not doing you any favours... Your blurring the lines between fantasy and reality to unburden the guilt and self-loathing youre feeling.

If you want it straight mate (and I know you respect straight talk) - it wasn't winnings as you'd already won it... It was your money. And you blew the lot. You blew a hideous sum of your own money which could have been used on you or your family. It's not winnings... It was already won, it was yours to keep. You only had to press on the screen twice to get to it yet you continued pressing the other parts of the screen that enable you to gamble as the feeling of gambling is what you're after, not the money...

What else can I say man, stay out of those bookies until April, lose the card and best of luck as always. You're a decent fella that's for sure... These machines aren't even hunting you down as they are stationary inanimate objects, you're hunting them down.

Going to work or I’d speak more. Your right I do justify it as winnings otherwise my head would be all over the place. I know it’s not right but it’s theconly way I make myself feel better. I have to get to March the 30 I was talking to the manager in hills she said that’s when the £2 stake will be active only 4 weeks

Maybe once your head is truly all over the place you may have more chance to stop gambling? What I mean is rather than tell yourself it was just 'winnings' so not that bad... Why not carry a holiday brochure around and each time you get an urge pull it out and have a look at what you threw away last time you got the urge...

You are losing unbelievable sums of money mate, that's a fact. Keep telling yourself that rather than it was winnings.