Help

You continue to be a shining inspiration Matt and are reaping the rewards of committing to recovery.

That 500 day mark is just around the corner.

Well done buddy.

DAY 480

Thanks guys for your comments, I do really appreciate them. It is nice to hear that I have in some way inspired some people to commit to their recovery.

So today has been an up and down day. I have secured a huge contract at work and will see our company well for a good few years. However this was put into perspective when a colleague told me this morning that he now has terminal cancer and has been given a maximum 2 years to live. In the past we have not seen eye to eye (generation thing and differing work views) however all that goes by the wayside when something like this happens. I feel so sorry for the poor guy and his family but shared my idea of a bucket list and he is seriously looking into it himself. Life is precious, it is short and it must not be taken for granted. Gambling isn't cancer and won't take your physical health but it takes your mental health and it will take your persona without a second thought.

Stay strong all and have a lovely weekend

Matt

Hi matt

Just popping by to say well done on the 480 days achievement.Sorry to hear the news about your colleague , times such as these remind us that life is indeed precious.
Take care
Annie x

Day 486

Thanks Annie, they really do appreciate it all the more.

I now consider myself to be an ex addict. It is still a dirty word but I plan to use it for the rest of time. I had an addiction that threatened me for 16 years, it affected my life, my well being and created an unhealthy version of me. I still have the potential to be that guy and that is something I will always live with but as long as that first bet doesn't come I will be guaranteed a better quality of life.

My past is my past, I have gambled, I have loved (although maybe not as much as I thought as no one knew me), I have lost but all this has made me stronger and I consider myself now to be a really good guy and I believe it. I am not perfect and never will be, I am however someone who knows himself and I bet (excuse the pun) that many people go through life never knowing who they really are.

Stay strong everyone.

Matt

Matt your Diary is too long to read all the way through but I've latched onto your last few weeks and 486 days is truly inspiring and you should be really proud of yourself, I am determined to follow your lead. Well done mate!

Wilsy

Here wishing you all the best and making it to 500 Matt - wow that will be an amazing achievement from where you have been . Keep going

DAY 494

Thanks for the support guys.

So less than a week from 500 days. Life is good, it is my Mum's bday today so taking her for dinner later with the family. I have bought her a nice present too. I am a world away from the days I was scraping money together just to be able to fuel my car and hoping for a win to pay for things. I still have debt to pay off, that will take some time but life is a lot more comfortable.

Work is going exceptionally well and I think this could be a big year for my company (fingers crossed). I really have my teeth firmly sunk into a better, gamble free life and I am really enjoying it.

I wish everyone here a nice gamble free Weeekend. Hope to check in again soon. I am sorry my updates are not as regular but life is very busy currently.

Matt

494 days, nice one Matt, no advice needed, just a huge pat on the back for doing so well.

Have a great weekend also!

Wilsy

4 days out for the BIG 500 GF DAYS ! Proud of you brother ! Take it easy 🙂

Sars

Great to hear from you Matt, am unsurprised that all is good for you as yours is a journey of strength and determination. Will be waving a flag when you hit 500 days, take care S x

Day 500

Hi all thanks as ever for your support and encouragment, it has been truly invaluable in getting to me to where I am today.

Been one hell of a ride but I somehow got here. This journey as we know is never ending and we cannot rest or get complacent. A year ago today I wrote...

Busy working on a Bucket List. Once my house is sold I am going to start getting a lot of them ticked off. I am in the process of booking a combined whale watching and Northern lights tour. Two things I am desperate to do and see. It is amazing what being free of gambling can open up for you.

If you have followed my diary you will know I went on the whale watching and Northern Lights tour (along with dog sledding). I set myself a goal I achieved it and loved it! Back when I set myself that goal I was in the throws of grief due to a horrible relationship breakdown. I lost 2 people I loved a lot but had the foresight that things could get better and they really did.

So yesterday was Valentines day, I haven't said much on here but I am in another relationship and this is a lot healthier than the previous one. She knows about my past, she knows about my gambling and that didn't stop her wanting to date me which was a big worry for me initially. However I had the mind set if someone can't accept my past they won't be part of my future!

As a valentine's gift I received a chance to tick off another on my bucket list, ride in a helicopter. It is apparently a high speed tour along the South Coast (where I live) I cannot wait to book it!

Anyway enough of that, I wish you all the very best and stay strong, stay gamble free and good things will be waiting for you too.

Matt

Congratulations Matt on 500 days gamble free. A heartwarming journey of rediscovery, a testament to your courage and an inspiration to many who are struggling with gambling issues.

Wishing you continued abstinence from gambling and the peace, contentment and happiness you deserve.

Well done on 500 days gamble free Matt ..... great to see you have fully got your life back and are in such a better place, a great example of what can be achieved and what we all are trying for ...... all the best.

Hi Matt, thanks for posting and being a consistent source of encouragement and inspiration.Wishing you buckets of happiness S x

DAY 501

Thanks again, your support to me continues to be invaluable.

Bit of a strange day today, feeling a bit empty but not sure why. No thoughts of gambling but maybe I have stopped and looked back and feel like at points I wish I had a time machine. Strange thing is though if I did have a time machine I have no idea where I would go back to!

I am a person who never let myself feel things before I would hide behind a smile and would always be upbeat no matter what was going on inside my head and behind closed doors. I no longer have any secrets and I am living my life now correctly but I do have regret and when I look back at the car crash that was my life I still feel some pain.

I know not every day can be a good day but I do feel a little frustrated with myself that I am feeling this way. I apologise for writing it on here but this diary has always been a safe haven for me to let out my thoughts and feelings.

Stay strong everyone.

Matt