Hope

Hi S.A.

Remember nodoby's perfect. We all try to live the best lives we can.Sometimes it doesn't go according to our blueprint we have mapped out, that's OK. Just take the next day and improve on it a little. Do not be too hard on yourself. You're a great help to me and I thank you for that.

Take care

Steve E

What a difference a day makes.

Yesterday.. depressed, anxious, negative thinking, full of self-condemnation and self-pity.

Today.. not depressed, not anxious, positive thinking, not condeming myself and no self-pity

Reason: Saturday night alcohol that went a bit far.

I forgive myself 🙂

Something else that gets me thinking. Just been watching this article on the news about the declining sense of community here in the Uk... its certainly the case with me. Since the age of 18 I have lived in about 15 different locations and set ups.. having never put down any roots. Don't get me wrong am not condemning myself here..its just how its been for me.

My gambling thrived living a rootless life. Perhaps I struggle less with gambling urges now because I have more stability and allow myself more support than i have ever allowed before.

Regards to all who read this.. S.A 🙂

Last gamble: 25th of May 08

Just wanted to say thanks for the message and nice one for not gambling since may, i cant talk about not beating yourself up because i have become a expert at that of late, but knowing that people like you who get inspiration from doing this not to gamble is very encouraging. all the best, peice out 🙂

ooo err sa... naughty boy,,, you know what the alcohol does lol... hope you had somet too eat with the curry sauce. lol id think chips hmmm... good too see ya still posting i havent felt the need too but somehow tonight i might beat my record lol

Hiya SA

Popping in to see ya 🙂 Glad to see you turned things around so quickly, pleaasee don't be too hard on yourself. In the grand scheme of things..you got sloshed after a stressful week.

Your still gamble free! and you are creating a stable life! not an easy feat especially on your own...give yourself credit for all the hard work you are and have been doing.

Me personally I just don't like getting drunk anymore..can't hack the hangover and view it as a waste of valuble time. But sometimes say to myself..I just take everything way too seriously lol..okay will stop rambling and thank you kind gentleman for the re inforcements on that fence. I won't be going anywhere near it 🙂

Del xxx

Thanks Del.. it is true i am very hard on myself sometimes.. depends on my mood and state of mind.

I have been to the doctors today..didnt actually see a doctor but saw the nurse.. weight and blood pressure checks etc. My blood pressure is sky high... I was on beta-blockers a while back.. it worked.. i stopped taking them.. now its shot up again. Ive never suffered with high bp until the last year. Need to look after myself. I will work on ways of reducing my stress levels.

In the past.. big stress equaled big gambling. Not any more though...progress

Regards to all who read this.. S.A 🙂

Last gamble: 25th of May 08

hey me del g and bandit are on msn come and join us my addy is [email protected] we cud have a laff x

Hi SA, that was so spooky.... I bought a red cabbage at the market before I read your post!! Who said red cabbage isn't exotic? its what you do with it that makes it exotic!

AH & I have resolved the lottery. You knew we would. But I'm having to really look at me too, and its not always easy. Coming on here has helped to keep me grounded and see things from another point of view. Thank you.

We all do it... beat ourselves up. Today, pat yourself on the back. You are doing the best you can to change things and that deserves to be acknowledged. Whatever c**P was happening for you last week you didn't gamble. Well done. Need to get to bed, up early 2morrow for work. Take care, Love Ostrich x

Hi S.A.

Hope all's going well with the stress reduction. Not sure how you do that though. The more you try to reduce stress, the more you get stressed thinking about it. There's a cheery thought.

Hope you're OK

Steve E

Hi SA, sorry to read about the BP, hope that you are managing to get some relaxation in, those relaxation tapes that you can buy in places like waterstones are good, also help you sleep

At least its not the gambling pushing up the BP. Keep calm, Bandit X

Hiya SA,

I'd agree with Bandit..getting in a bit of relaxation. Do anything that works. Part of my problem is pushing myself too hard, and I'm trying to create balance in my life.

Stress I realise now (although we need some of it to a degree) toooo much can have a serious effect on our physical well being. I've been crippled with stomach problems for ages now...and I think that its probably stress thats caused it all along. I'm now hoping that it is..because I can something about it..and have..and it's working. One being..cutting out coffee..simple intervention that has worked wonders.

Take care..and take a rest from all them fence re enforcements!..;-)

Hug

Del xxx

Thanks for your thoughts everyone.. rest assured I shall be abseiling into your diaries over the weekend 😉

A long day to day.. just me at work... got alot done but my brain feels frazzled now.. struggling to switch off and stop "thinking" about work related stuff. Its the weekend.. a time to chill out and relax.. to de-stress. i shall try and do that.

Regards to all who read this.. S.A 🙂

Last gamble: 25th of May 08

Sa

You are quite an insparation to me, I have been reading your posts and realise its not just me that feels this way.

I know its only a couple of weeks for me for in bingo years its a lifetime.

Hows your mouth doing now?

Love and Hugs

Hello dawns,

Thanks for your thoughts

My mouth is in good shape :-).. ulcer free. There was another one threatening but its since deciding otherwise.. lol

Its been a good day... nothing major has happened.. spoke to few friends on phone.. bit of shopping.. pottering about. This evening i have been stewing some stewing steak... with onions, garlic, guinness and stock... following a recipe i am. What a difference to the days when i would spend my Saturday evenings feeding machines.. a recipe that was very simple with a pre-dictable outcome...

I tell you something after I had done my money I would feel...........

EMPTY

NOTHING

Regards to all who read this.. S.A 🙂

Last Gamble: 25th of May 08

hi.i know the empty.........nothing feeling so well.id gamble.lose.go to my bedroom,turn out the lights.not even able to cry and think what the hell have i just done.if it was late at night then the feeling when u wake in the morning and realise what you have done is unbareable..stomach in knots,i never want that feeling again and not had it for a while.good luck in your recovery and keep posting.all the best neil.