lost the plot..

Thanks paul and lili

Yep i'm a right night owl me..lol

Seem to come alive at this hour, probably because of my shifts at work cos i'm almost always on lates, which i prefer.

Am sinking a good few drinks, only cos its Xmas though lol...(b***** liar).. any excuse..

Have fun and enjoy, i've got a rum and coke here waiting for Mr claus.

If he don't turn up in the next hour or two i'm gonna drink it for him..lol

Takecare and have a good one

Hi night owl, have you woken up yet? Have a good Christmas fella.....and be a good boy!

Hope you're well and having a great day LB. Thanks for your concern and posting on my diary. As you'll see your doing better than me, but please keep it up, I've been following your diary even though I've not posted.

Thanks again

Simon

Hope your enjoying a large glass of christmas cheer! Enjoy your time off.

We can do this man.

Hi londonbloke.

Thanks for the xmas wishes. I hope you had a good day and that you enjoy your time off work.

Keep strong mate.

Hi Diary

Well another Xmas passes us by.. Hope everyone had a good one..

Being totally honest here, for me it is never that good... Always feel very lonely this time of year..guess its the lack of the family thing..

Had my mate round, in fact shes asleep now as i type this, she ain't a night owl like me..lol..

We had a lovely dinner and some great chats and watched a lot of telly, it was great to have her here... Shes a diamond to put up with me..

Been on the drink for the past 3 days, feel as sober as a judge just now even though i've hardly let up since Friday..

The most important thing is ..I have not gambled..Thats got to be a first for me at Christmas for amny a year, so thats something for me to be chuffed about..

I wanted too, god did i really want too, but I DIDN'T DO IT...So 2 fingers up to you, My Gambling Demons...29-0 to me so b****** to you.

I'm 29 days clean today...

Bring on the new year..I can do this and i am doing this..

Hang in there, keep strong, never stop believing in yourselves, if i can put a stop to this madness then nothings impossible.

Keep fighting the good fight..

Takecare

Keep safe

Cheers..

ignore the last post..

ran out of booze and went to the shop 2 hours ago..ended up in agora and blew all i had in my pocket then popped back home and took everything i could find out of her purse cos shes asleep and blew the lot on joker poker slots.

walked out wth 11.80 got a bottle what i went out for..

lost it ..am in the s*** again..shes going to f**** kil me when she wakes up..

i can't do it..

end

Lb... apologise to your friend.. eat humble pie and lots of it!!

You were starting to get a taste of normality and then you hit self-destruct... thats addiction... exactly what ive done on many occasions. If nothing changes then nothing changes.

You have choices just like I have choices.. you can make the right choices.. you CAN do it! .. S.A

Hi Londonbloke

What SA has said is spot on m8.

I have one thing to add.

Nothing changes if nothing changes.How true.

So the first thing that needs to change is.Start believing in yourself.I know how much you want to stop.This addiction needs 24 hour a day attention when you first stop kid,but it doesnt stay that way.It definatley gets easier as time goes by.When you are stealing off friends m8 .Then your addiction is affecting them.Your friend doesnt deserve this. You dont want to steal off her,.Do you.

Dont let this be just another episode of a gambling f**k up m8 .Let it be the begining of the end.All the best Jeff.

LB,i can only echo what SA and Jeff have said,.....the addiction makes us press "self destruct" just when we are starting to feel a little bit happy, and a little bit in control:),....it has happened to me in the past,and i would imagine lots of others too.

You have still made progress this last couple of months,don't give up on giving up'

Seano.

Ive just read the start and end of your diary I will read it all just wanted to read the last few bits to see how the journey is really progressing. I have battled the addiction for 5 years now, and have realised I only stopped for 2 and a half years coz mummy and daddy were watching me like a hawk, I was working hard, and litereally I had no money or time. Now the job im doing is less physical, Im less tired ish. Well i had a relapse after 2 and a half years. I started playing line poker again and the website happened ot offer casino games, anyway the damage is done now and I don't want to go back into old habits. I wish you all the best, but think about what you really want in life, think about ur dreams and aspirations, what will make u truly happy. I would say to you to avoid the drink, Im not a heavy drinker, but it can make u grow big balls, you feel invincible and you get that winning feeling, which it never is. I hope oyu the best of luck and wish that you can keep intouch via my diary too,

LB,

Hope your friend is OK about what happened. Hope you are OK too.

29 days is a long time. Well done on that. Now, dust yourself off and go for the same again. You are making real progress so don't let a slip turn into a binge.

Thinking of you.

Brian

Hi lb, I echo all the comments by all the others. You can pick yourself up from this. Come on fella. Thinking of you. Russ

Hi,

Not long now until we start a gamble-free 2011. And it really is going to be a great year!

GT

Hai LB!

Wishing you well bud, you've been a support of mine in the past and will continue willing you on. Was going to suggest for you having a read through your diary to remind you of your lows, but f******k it, its not the time to look back in either gambling or life in general...... The future's ahead of us, its our choice! Do we lay down or move on? no brainer there bud!

Here and now looking into a new year, the counselling on offer free from gamcare is quite a gift, a chance of making a 360 turn round in life! nothing ventured nothing gained......

YOU can do this LB, but only if you WANT.

Good Luck