Miseryofgamblingjoyoflife

Start of day 4 clean off gambling. No urges whatsoever...although thats easy because not much sport on and the latest negative spout of gambling is still fresh in my mind.
Even in last few days i see small changes..feel like im sleeping/eating better. Worries are still there but there at the back of my mind and im spending quality time with my family. Even rediscovering old hobbies again(ones which i ignored while gambling..though i ignored everything anyway).

Nice to have over on the diary section when is the next meeting you can get to? I know from my meeting and you will know from when you was last at GA you will be welcomed back. There's no quick fix to this you need to keep working at recovery and here and GA are the best place to do that.

Keep close to your diary keep posting and reading and things will improve.

KTF

Hi JJ, good to see you have started a diary to log your recovery progress. Believe me when I say the first few days and weeks are the hardest mentally as the pain is still raw and we are still hurting from the latest big loss or whatever. When you feel up to it have a look at the different aspects of your life and where you'd like to improve. As CG's we procastinate a lot so I'm sure there's plenty to look at and do. Remember one day and one thing at a time though.

I can't say enough about the impact GA has had on me in such a short period of time. Getting back to your meetings is a big step in the right direction.

Thanks guys for your words of advice. Oldham i see 302 days...sam crow 52 days..so well done guys so far and never get complacent.

I once went to a meeting and a person who had done 13-14 years had slipped and lost more than half his life savings in just a few days. Was very scary how quick he just fell back into gambling. He had to go and tell his family after that. That was not my local meeting so i never heard what happened after..hope it worked out well.

As regards GA i screwed a person over..we spoke alot..they was a great help to me then BOOM,i cut them off and never went back! And thats last march..so 15-16 months ago. Since then iv done 2 months clean a number of times myself but damaged myself when the slip came

We're addicts JJ, that's the horrible reality of this addiction, we treat others like rubbish 🙁 If he/she is working the steps, they will understand & find forgiveness...Don't let that put you off going!

you wont be the first and you wont be the last, i have ssen a lot of people come back who just cut themselves off and find they need the support again and have always been welcomed back and whos to say that person is still there, alternativley if its that difficult look for another meeting but dont use this as an excuse not to do what is right for you.

KTF

Recovery comes first ahead of everything else i suppose must be the way. Theres 3 meetings all within 1 hour and 30 minutes drive ..all which ive been to before when i was doing really well (11 months and 8 months clean). Im so pumped up to leave this c**P behind...ive procrastinated all my life and gambling has dictated almost my whole life...out of the darkness and into the light!

Out of interest JJ what county do you hail from? I'm a Down man myself and attend the Newry meetings.

Im a tyrone man. Even newry is probably within range. Dungannon....donegal and omagh also

Day 5..payday. well dont know why its called payday..i wont be debt free most likely until january 2017(which would and could be worse if not for my decision to stop) . I must stay focused on staying bet free.

I remember sometimes payday i would gamble alll my wages plus more and the feeling of utter despair that followed. Well no more.

Its a long road back but a day at a time i can chip away at debts and eventually theyl be a distant memory.

Day 6. Becoming more human lol...instead of being in grip of gambling 24/7.
What i mean is..when i gamble..my mind is checkin results..wen next bet it..racecards..fixtures..etc. i cannot relax..my focus is obsessive in that i ignore other humans..i dont eat much..i am restless..irritable and angry. I live either HIGHS or severe lows...there is no middle ground.

As strange as it sounds...if halle berrry or michelle keegan asked me on a romantic date...or i could gamble all evening....ID HAVE GAMBLED lol....and thats the definetion of madness!!!

I am from Laois, anyway keep going your doing well.

Day 8 without a bet...no real urges to worry me..made my first payment of debt back today....another 6 months of payments and il be clear! Sounds easy in theory but will be more difficult in practice!
Sleeping normal again..not watching sports news or reading newspapers..have to keep up guard!

Gambling is a sneaky wee poisonous life wrecker! Time is right to kick it away!

Hi JJ, good to see to the early stages of your recovery are going well. There will be plenty more ups and downs especially in the early days, it feels like an emotional rollercoaster at times but it does get easier. Pleasure to walk this road with you.

Keep moving forward